I like the idea of ENFJ as performers.... I must admit to "performing" at times, especially in public.
What if there is no audience, except for you? Growth for ENFJs is going inside to those areas we reject and ignore.
Ultimately, the audience does not really have a requirement to watch, and can always walk away if they don't like the performance.
First, let me say that I
feel that you are being quite kind and generous--"performing" for me (and our assembled audience) and trying to "help" me to the best of your ability. That
feels like a healthy ENFj to me.
Second, however, I would like to add that I have been spending a lot of time in my inferior function (Ti), my PoLR, lately--just thinking, and thinking, and troubleshooting, and trying to find the best way forward when my Ni (secondary) tells me there's no good path to take as, it appears, my choices are all bad to varying degrees. Socionics predicts that this retreat into Ti is quite unhealthy for an ENFj (EIE-Fe). Instead, what I am supposed to do when my FeNi program loop fails me is to turn to Se. I need to just get out of my head and observe--get some new stimulus, meet new people, hear new voices, expose myself to new sensations. Instead, I shut myself up, runimate (Ti), and give myself an ulcer. The body speaks (through pain) and expresses the utter helplessness I feel when my FeNi program just doesn't work the way I want it to.
Third, I'd like to address your specific question, to wit: "What if there is no audience, except for you?" Indeed. What good to anyone is a performer without an audience? Here, my typical strategy (when I get slightly more healthy) is to find another audience. I reach out to family, friends, or people on an internet forum. I have an overwhelming desire to be performing for
someone. Otherwise, I feel I am
noone. That's the major downside of extraversion, imo, for the ENFj. All the same, I hear your advice. I might be happier if I could learn to perform "for myself" a little more often. Instead, I neglect myself more often than not when I am emotionally distressed, in the typical, self-sacrificing, doormat-like, overly-giving, and occasionally even self-immolating ENFj way.
Fourth, let me add that while you are correct to say that "the audience does not really have a requirement to watch, and can always walk away if they don't like the performance." That's quite true, and it is also outrageously painful when the person who's "walking away" is the person who ought to be the one who's most invested in your emotional health, i.e. your mate. This kind of rejection is almost unbearable (for me, at least). My options become (1) suck it up and deal with the fact that my mate knows it hurts me when she actively ignores me, but she's going to do it anyway, and will tell me so with either words or actions, in her typical, alpha quadrant way that is fueled by the alphas' belief that "we're all free, and you can't make me do anything, and
my need (to get away from all the negative Fe you're giving off)
must come first," or (2) find a new audience. Both options stink. I don't want a new audience. That's why I married the person I did. Now what? Here my FeNi ego block fails me. As I mentioned before, Socionics seems to suggest that, under these circumstances, I should turn to Se rather than Ti (pain).
Finally, as you almost certainly noticed, I have been riffing on the "ENFj as a performer" theme for a while lately, and I have collected (for easy access) some links to my latest ramblings (performances) on that subject. Here:
http://www.typologycentral.com/foru...ype/44645-anakin-skywalker-7.html#post2591762
http://www.typologycentral.com/foru.../33306-depressed-isfp-look-4.html#post2591674
http://www.typologycentral.com/foru...nships-vast-majority-fail-11.html#post2591775
http://www.typologycentral.com/foru...fj-/79347-enfx-cult-leader-5.html#post2592526
http://www.typologycentral.com/foru.../78372-silence-pretentious-6.html#post2593599
All this came about from my identification with the description of the ENFj male as "Hamlet" by various Socionics theorists. It just seems to fit me well.
More here:
http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin/content.php/59-Hamlet-Male-portrait-ENFj-by-Beskova
http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin/content.php/38-ENFj-description-Filatova
http://www.socioniko.net/en/1.1.types/et.html
Thanks for the response.
