Bad true things about you (shake your self-pity away, THEN write plz)

[Ghost of the dead horse]

Negatives are too often clouded in self pity, sometimes expressed in too an encouraging environment.

"I'm fat"!

"No you're not, you're just lovely"

"ahh, thanks"
​

What else? Negatives can be told as a joke, meant to express the idea of opposite via various methods. Some kinds of jokes draw attention to person's good qualities, actually working as an advertisement for them.

Then there's token negatives.

"Ahh I rule the world, but I have bad hair".​

Lets get on with this. I want to go to the real negatives before half my readers quit. No, I don't want unrealistically completely negatives too; just the truth.

So. Just to get me started..

I'm ..

-jealous of people who have "life", meaning friends and community (more than I)
-disappointed I'm not any more intelligent
-disappointed my personality has been crafted at some point of a life, I'm not some "true, unaltered, ''' organic ''' person (if there are some)".. or "child of nature".. it's completely, unalterably, unrevocably impossibly for me, ever
-i've lost 5 years of my life
-i've got no taste in clothes in the last 5 years, and i've tried to emphasize the importance of ideas over appearance, noticing I have to give up. I feel like a bum wearing what I have.

huh that's enough for now.

 

[Night]

Great topic!

Foibles are fun to pick at. Best way to progress is to examine weakness.

I...

...can be short-tempered/dismissive towards others.
...have a hard time deciphering offensive v. funny when telling jokes in unfamiliar social territory. As a result, people misinterpret misguided attempts at humor for inappropriate 'edginess'.
...have a hard time 'bottling' my energy when appropriate, and occasionally piss off my (xNFJ) wife when we're watching a movie/TV.
...vacillate between great impulse control and willy-nilly spontaneity, which can wreak havoc on those around me.
...wish I protected better my connection with my mother.

 

[Salomé]

^ I don't see any of that in your online persona (except the mother bit )

-I'm ruthless with myself and others
-I'm horribly idle and waste my potential
-I'm completely disorganised and fail to accomplish my goals
-I value truth too much (at the expense of all else); yet I'm rarely completely honest
-I sometimes hurt people deliberately to push them away

 

[nanook]

since i know a hell of a lot of negatives of me, but analyze them based on their intrinsic workings, not based on how they effect others (while being aware of that), that is to say, not as behavioral traits, i could/would not give you a short list.

i would have to write a book, but it would be shaped by a shadow of "self hate", because that's just the problem with a person, who is ascending strongly at the cost of suppression of his origins, that is to say, a personality torn into pieces over several stages of development.

all the high leveled insight about ones "bad things" is judging these things harshly, because it is understanding the million of horrific consequences they would have, if set free, and that they had for so long, when they operated from the shadow. thus this judgment keeps these things locked in were they are, frozen in the shadow. what have I done? "self-defense" - murdering trans-personal live to stabilize the illusion of the own separate self. the devil himself, fallen from all grace, guilty of treason of all that is (w)holy. all the insight into one's failures is not much of a help, if it only makes one hide/run away from god (the w.holy).

so in a nutshell, that's the one negative thing behind pretty much all of them.

and when i voluntarily displayed some of my negative traits in a self-ironic humorous way - to make a topic more entertaining, a bunch of monkeys have torn me apart, just to tell me to 'get better already', while completely ignoring what the thread was actually about.

so no further examples for free.

and no, this is not where you try to accuse me of trying to sound deep, only to avoid being honest about something specific negative (voyeur!).

this is where it's your turn!

 

[Synarch]

^ I don't see any of that in your online persona (except the mother bit )

-I'm ruthless with myself and others
-I'm horribly idle and waste my potential
-I'm completely disorganised and fail to accomplish my goals
-I value truth too much (at the expense of all else); yet I'm rarely completely honest
-I sometimes hurt people deliberately to push them away

+1

Seems cowardly to just agree with you, but you've covered many of my most obvious problem areas, as well. Thank you for your honesty.

 

[Kangirl]

some of my negatives:

- spend my way out of bad moods
- often react to bad reactions to my sarcasm with more sarcasm, not less
- spend a lot of time thinking, and not enough time doing
- can be pretty vain
- extremely fearful (to the point of it interfering with my life) about irrational stuff - flying and wasps, mostly
- too addicted to praise from authority figures I respect

 

[Totenkindly]

Based partly on Blue's list:

• I'm ruthless with myself (and secretly ruthless of others but usually never let them know that, to protect them from me).
• I'm horribly idle and fritter away time in which I could accomplish things of value
• I secretly expect people to criticize what I do and/or reject me outright, so it colors how I approach and relate to them.
• Being good at seeing the pitfalls sometimes leads me not to try hard things and thus fail, whereas I could have succeeded anyway if I had just tried harder.
• I'm horribly undisciplined and have trouble keeping my life structured (e.g., staying on a tight budget or schedule).
• I'm embarrassed to admit I don't know something (or how to do something), and I don't like to ask for help unless people have already made overt offers to help me.
• I sometimes let people take advantage of my commitment to the relationship or willingness to flex and put up with more crap and pick up their slack.
• I don't like to hurt people and have sometimes not stood up for myself when I should have, or I feel guilty when I do stand up for myself.

 

[nanook]

okay, just because i like to talk about myself, i will throw in a free extra. actually, because it might be worth something, to look at this topic (bullying and self-defense) from a perspective that is not commonly held. have you ever been mobbed? i have never been mobbed for my personality (i don't count verbal mockery), but i have been held hostage violently, at the age of nine or so, for having a weak body and slight inclination to display fear (I am fun to play with). too bad, my fear did not stop me, from spitting one of two bullies into his face. i don't remember how i got out of this situation. probably i was kicking, then running.

so this is, where the metaphorical murder happened, that i was talking about (one of them - not the original probably, but the one of most symbolical value). and i murdered so much in that moment. and i still go back in my dreams to murder that guy again. and have pity for him, afterwards. but then the other guy tries to murder me.

i murdered myself, by putting proud over security, attacking the stronger force, rather than playing save.

i murdered him, for the delusional sake of my proud.
i murdered him again and again to justify that.
i murdered his friend, so there would be no witness of what i did.
i murdered the witness of my guilt.

i murdered myself, again and again, by blaming me for risking my live for my proud, suppressing anything that could be interpreted as display of proud by anyone (since i had projected the witness, thus no control over details) again and again, believing it's for safety (believing that it is for your safety as well), when it's just removing me from live. i have probably murdered a lot of proud people

i have murdered anyone who's heart relied on me staying alive, most notably my mother.

 

[Kyrielle]

I'm deathly afraid of rejection once people find out who I really am beyond my "surface self".
I have trouble accepting generosity in my direction.
I have problems realising my own self-worth.
I can be very blunt to the point of being rude.
I, generally, don't like most people.
I don't like asking for help, because I think I can always figure the problem out by myself.
I overcomplicate and overthink things.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

i would have to write a book, but it would be shaped by a shadow of "self hate", because that's just the problem with a person, who is ascending strongly at the cost of suppression of his origins, that is to say, a personality torn into pieces over several stages of development.

No accusation of failed depth in there, as you've always managed to stimulate my thinking.

Discontinuity of my personality has at times brought great distress to me, but at times, freedom. Many times I've felt extremely hard and deep, to the point of failing to live of act because of it. I think I have had to rework my most stable core of myself .. or the next most stable parts of myself.. for 5 times in my life. So many separate lives with little or no understanding between them.

Change from juvenile to mature. From strong to failed. From desiring to somethign devoid of feeling.

Sometimes it's just that the biomass of what's i've made up of has persisted, with my mind and cognition drifting to whatever.

Just replying to a part that most resonated with me.

 

[Synarch]

I like how much I am relating to the other "types" in this thread. We are all pretty similar in certain ways, it seems.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

I like how much I am relating to the other "types" in this thread. We are all pretty similar in certain ways, it seems.

I've felt a lot of insight and identity with us all in here.. it's time for me to sleep, and come back to this thread later.

 

[cascadeco]

-I'm quite hard on myself, and equally hard/judging of others (in my mind). But since I don't really like this attribute of myself, I am constantly trying to push the judgments away or water them down
-I'm probably a bit of a commitment-phobe. Strong independent streak is part of that, the other part is probably my not believing anyone would really want to be with me once they learned/saw enough - rejection thing. And if I'm truly honest, I suspect the reverse is more of what's at the root: Am *I* capable of being in a lifelong relationship? I sometimes doubt that I am.
-Have a few OCD tendencies. I can also obsess about aspects of myself or my life that I don't like and it becomes virtually impossible for me to pull myself out of it. Easily go into over-analyzing/psychoanalyzing mode.
-I second-guess and monitor myself a LOT, as a general mode of operation...but obviously this is an internal thing so wouldn't be that evident to others. So this probably leads to more of an inability to be fully in the moment, since I'm constantly analyzing things and monitoring what I say and how I say it. Also potentially withholding much of my personality from others.
-There are probably others but I think these are the main ones.

 

[Nyota]

Good subject. Normally I hate thinking about this stuff, but recently found how healthy is actually is.

I am sometimes overly sensitive to other's feelings. [this can be a bad thing...]
I over-analyze things way too much. Most often, it's about relationships.
I live in a fantasy world at times, and am disappointed a lot.
I hate it when people don't want to take my advice, and this has led to me (almost) never giving it out.

There's more... (maybe later)

 

[Split_Infinitive]

I can see myself in everything BaileyTodd and Kyrielle said! I'm pretty much disappointed all the time because nothing ever lives up to my distorted expectations. And yet I dare call myself a realist.

- I scare people away when my enthisuasm invariably changes into obsession
- I jump into conflict with both feet when it comes to getting things done or fighting to correct an injustice, but I run like hell when conflict touches me personally and then I pretend it doesn't exist.

 

[juggernaut]

-I have very little patience with anyone over the age of 10.
-I cannot abide laziness or slovenliness, even from people who are not in my immediate bubble.
-Emotions, my own included, irritate me.
-I interrupt a lot more than I should even when I'm genuinely interested in something someone else is saying.
-I don't care if I hurt the feelings of people I have nothing invested in.
-I'm exacting and determined, to the point that I often don't even realize I've hurt people that I do care about.
-I expect more from others than they are capable of.

 

[Orangey]

I relate a lot to the lists posted by bluemonday and Jennifer, so some of this may be a repeat of theirs.

-I am lazy and undisciplined. I have trouble getting things done, and when I do, they are never the highest quality that they could be if I had put more/longer effort.
-I often rationalize my problems as being the result of larger forces acting upon me, when in fact I, and I alone, am responsible for them.
-I tend to go into self-pity/self-loathing mode more often than I am proud to admit. A me v.s. the world sort of outlook is borne of this.
-I am critical of others and doubly critical of myself, which often leads to inaction.

 

[Polaris]

-I'm empty and dead most of the time.

-I'm very bad with practical decisions. When faced with one, I become antsy and try to rush to the right answer as fast as possible. Once I've made the decision, I wonder if it was the right one and if I should change it. It's as if I've only half-decided.

-I have a tendency to scorn other people as shallow and offensive. On the flip side, I beat my own self up all the time.

-I get things done, but not because I'm motivated. I have to force myself, and I hate that about me.

-I'm extremely prone to miss the obvious for the things most people would never notice. Because of this, I think people are unable to decide whether I'm stupid or intelligent.

-I'm hopelessly naive when it comes to the practical, everyday things that other people have no trouble with. This is another thing that makes me feel stupid.

-I fluctuate between being cold and being melodramatic.

 

[Shaula]

- I have difficultly taking responsibility for my mistakes and often find ways to blame it on others.
- I have difficultly initiating projects because I'm afraid of screwing it up. If it isn't perfect then it was a failure.
- I'm afraid of uncertainty and try to avoid it as much as possible.
- I become hostile if I loose an argument and arrogant if I win. I hate loosing so much that if I can't win then I'll find a way to take the other person down with me.
- I'm not nearly as caring or humble as I make myself out to be.
- I'm very critical and demanding of those who are close to me. I'm constantly trying to influence them that my way is the only right way.
- If I've accomplished something I feel proud of and I don't get a lot of feedback I'll 'fish for' compliments and praise.
- I get pretty hard on myself, sometimes self-destructive, if I'm not 'the best'. For some reason I view life like a competition.

 

[01011010]

-Critical
-Condescending
-Elitist
-Reclusive
-Dismissive
-Overly Cautious
-Misanthrope

My greatest folly is an irrational need for significant others to make sense. If an individual repeats strange emotional behavior on a consistent basis, it leads to me pushing them away. I also lose respect for them. This stems from my own short sightedness and illogical reactions.