As an INTP I realized very late in life that my mind's drive to optimize the hell out of anything and everything sticks me with two very bad side effects.
1. I completely ignore opportunity cost because I'm focused on optimizing to death with the variables I have
2. I don't take care of myself
I will talk about point 1 next time. This time I'd like to talk about #2, and ask fellow NTs and in particular INTPs and in particular girls whether they experience this as well.
Basically the mind sees my body as a nuisance, and itself as a mere spectator. As it does this it tries to optimize for parameters as if I weren't even there with my needs and feelings.
Money: When I pick a hotel try to spend as little as possible with no concern for comfort. After all, spending the night is a biologically imposed delay - not part of the grand plan. Any money spent on accommodation is basically wasted. As I ponder the hotel cost I am confronted by a million ways in which the same money would gratify the mind a lot more.
Time: I try to squeeze as many activities into a day as possible. I need to go to the gym. I want to finish at least 3 separate work related tasks. Clear all emails and phone calls. And more. As I do this I may neglect showering, shaving my face, I may eat too late, not sleep properly etc.
So in other words my mind tends to experience the world as a frigging disembodied agent. It monopolizes all resources sparing very little for the body and only when the latter compromises its functioning.
I'm making it a bit too dramatic, perhaps with time I have already improved on this a bit. But still there are times when I realize all of a sudden that I'm feeling miserable! And I snap out of thinking and realize I'm treating myself like trash, I should spend more time making my body feel good rather than indulging hour after hour in mental gratification.
It's hard though. I have a particular attraction to exciting things, especially intellectually exciting things. I wish I had the time to write an automated program to plot Ulam's spiral on many multidimensional manifolds and do a multidim pattern recognition program to see if prime numbers create a stable pattern under any conceivable geometry. This would take years full time - I'm not sure anyone's worked on pattern recognition on multidimensional geometry. I'd like to make a game starring me. I started it years ago, the engine, the first two screens, then I didn't have time to finish it. I'd like to become a real pro at the violin rather than just dabbling. This is a total must do, I'm willing to sacrifice pretty much anything.
Do you see - there are an unlimited number of fulfilling, rewarding, extremely exciting things my mind wants to do, and the body can't keep up.
I need to relax, talk with people, eat some chocolate, appreciate the moment, so I can reduce cortisol, produce some melatonin, and so forth. I need to force myself to go out when I see some sun, so I can produce some vitamin D and improve my mood.
But generally the mind monopolizes resources. The body starves of resources until the mind's functioning is compromised.
I feel I should take better care of myself. In the end I'm like an adrenaline junkie or a crack addict except that my crack is knowledge, but not even knowledge, it's more like feelings cranked up to the max that I get when I penetrate some new sphere with my awareness or see the fruits of my unbounded creativity.
Coming back to you, do you feel the same and how do you cope?
1. I completely ignore opportunity cost because I'm focused on optimizing to death with the variables I have
2. I don't take care of myself
I will talk about point 1 next time. This time I'd like to talk about #2, and ask fellow NTs and in particular INTPs and in particular girls whether they experience this as well.
Basically the mind sees my body as a nuisance, and itself as a mere spectator. As it does this it tries to optimize for parameters as if I weren't even there with my needs and feelings.
Money: When I pick a hotel try to spend as little as possible with no concern for comfort. After all, spending the night is a biologically imposed delay - not part of the grand plan. Any money spent on accommodation is basically wasted. As I ponder the hotel cost I am confronted by a million ways in which the same money would gratify the mind a lot more.
Time: I try to squeeze as many activities into a day as possible. I need to go to the gym. I want to finish at least 3 separate work related tasks. Clear all emails and phone calls. And more. As I do this I may neglect showering, shaving my face, I may eat too late, not sleep properly etc.
So in other words my mind tends to experience the world as a frigging disembodied agent. It monopolizes all resources sparing very little for the body and only when the latter compromises its functioning.
I'm making it a bit too dramatic, perhaps with time I have already improved on this a bit. But still there are times when I realize all of a sudden that I'm feeling miserable! And I snap out of thinking and realize I'm treating myself like trash, I should spend more time making my body feel good rather than indulging hour after hour in mental gratification.
It's hard though. I have a particular attraction to exciting things, especially intellectually exciting things. I wish I had the time to write an automated program to plot Ulam's spiral on many multidimensional manifolds and do a multidim pattern recognition program to see if prime numbers create a stable pattern under any conceivable geometry. This would take years full time - I'm not sure anyone's worked on pattern recognition on multidimensional geometry. I'd like to make a game starring me. I started it years ago, the engine, the first two screens, then I didn't have time to finish it. I'd like to become a real pro at the violin rather than just dabbling. This is a total must do, I'm willing to sacrifice pretty much anything.
Do you see - there are an unlimited number of fulfilling, rewarding, extremely exciting things my mind wants to do, and the body can't keep up.
I need to relax, talk with people, eat some chocolate, appreciate the moment, so I can reduce cortisol, produce some melatonin, and so forth. I need to force myself to go out when I see some sun, so I can produce some vitamin D and improve my mood.
But generally the mind monopolizes resources. The body starves of resources until the mind's functioning is compromised.
I feel I should take better care of myself. In the end I'm like an adrenaline junkie or a crack addict except that my crack is knowledge, but not even knowledge, it's more like feelings cranked up to the max that I get when I penetrate some new sphere with my awareness or see the fruits of my unbounded creativity.
Coming back to you, do you feel the same and how do you cope?