Could you type me? I’d appreciate it.
I’m going to do this out of order since I think someone said I was chaotic neutral.
i guess this is more chaotic evil tho.
but yeah. I’m not doing that bitch chickpea first. Fuck that. Plus. You are someone who I feel like I might have fun spewing some thoughts on.
so. I’ve read through your blogs here and there and it has made me absolutely convinced that you are a 9. Like. I think I could be hanging off a cliff and if someone asked me to reconsider your type and I could live Idk if I could really justify anything else. (Ok. Ok. Maybe a very phobic 6- or a really weak 3 typing)
I do think you are 3 influenced. I recall you saying that as a teenager you were really pushed into being very results driven. And that it has caused you stress in the past. Now. I might be wrong. It’s been a while. And if I am- I’m sorry and you can just ignore this whole paragraph. But. Yeah. I think your connection to 3 is strong. The fact that it was your sort of natural state of being- until you crashed- speaks to me as if it was the so called “next step” towards development for you from 9. For a while maybe you felt “stable” enough to push towards some of those 3 oriented goals- but, because you are a 9 core- they never really fully felt like YOUR goals and so of course- you’d burn out. Once you had to start adulting- you couldn’t just follow the path of 3ness that was set out before you. Not during a period of huge adjustment. So you fell to reactive 6 for a while. Which from what I gather- created a LOT of concern in the people around you as you became super anxious and constantly agitated and just- waaay more reactive than you had probably ever been before. All the while- while reacting- feeling resentful because you are still a 9 core and you STILL hold so much back. Even if no one sees it.
anyways. If I am misremembering things- which is totally possible… I don’t read much on here anymore unfortunately. Skip the above. But that’s part of why I think you are a 9. A 9 and a 6 and a 3. You just seem to ping between those three types so much that even tho they are all part of a single triangle the only other type Id consider for you would be a 4 fix. But no. Introverted 96s are waaaay more “stuck in thouvht loops” than people would give credit for.
but yeah. Enneagram. 936.
9w1 3w4 6w?
the 1 wing probably helped you maintain the discipline to “achieve” those 3ish goals. 8 would have meant a probably less consistent performance and less ability to “go with things” for as long as you seemed to. While 8 can be dynamic and charged- it also tends to steamroll. It doesn’t “stay on the tracks” to “stay on the tracks” like w1 does.
3w4 is kinda explained above. Strong fix. Honestly all of your fixes are relatively strong. And your wing is pretty strong too. Its actually kinda impressive. Usually there’s some sort of “neglected area” but well. Not with your enneagram. It actually might be a bit of the problem now that I’m thinking of it.
I do think you are in some sort of spiral where you are unable to break out of the 369 triangle.
if I had to guess what was going on it would be that you are in an Fi-Si loop. I used to think ISFJ, but I don’t think so anymore. I don’t think you use Fe. I think you are a 9 and an introvert and a sensitive one at that who is pinging back between overanalysis of your feelings and the drag of si providing soooo much backup for them. The fact that it actually seems to be what is sort of troubling you- this sort of fixation (that word sounds meaner than it is- more “analysis”) of the past- and the inability to really “use” this focus to propel yourself forward- makes me think it’s not your dominant function.
i think you were probably a sensitive INFP 9w1 who was pushed into using functions and motivating forces that you were very weak in for a very long time. Te was demanded of you- and while your 1 wing sorta made the best of that situation- it wasn’t really “who you were” at the time. Sorta like being forced to write with your feet instead of your hands. Yes. You can do it. But eventually you’ll just resent you couldn’t use the very valid and muuuuch more effective limbs connected to your shoulders. You’ll think of EVERY time you had to “make due” when you really didn’t- and with a connection to 6 and non dominant Si- it’s gunna be a lot. Or it was a lot. I genuinely am very very very extremely sorry for what you seem to have gone through. It seems very unfair and doesn’t seem like you really had much “help”, only a lot of judgement.
anyways. Final typing. INFP 9w1 3w4 6w? sp/so. Idk any of that other stuff but I’d put you in Hufflepuff tho tbh I think you’d do ok in any house. I just think Hufflepuff would be the kindest.