Also I find it interesting you said once someone becomes your "close friend and confidante" you no longer see them as dating material. I've found people who fit this category are the
best dating material. Don't you want your SO to be a close friend and confidante?
I do lol I can't really explain the line I place between friends and lovers, it is just there. I haven't ever had a friend that was a lover, because I place a different value on my friends than I do a lover, I mean we can be close but there will be difference in the stuff we talk about.
It's not even an intentional cut off point, nor a rational one, it's just a feeling based reaction that happens.
I am closer to the INFP guy in question than I would ever have been if I had chosen to date him.
I've typed out about 3 different explanations that make no sense and deleted them. So if this one doesn't either, then phooey lol.
Don't think I don't sit down totally aware of how stupid this reaction is, I wish I could change it and fancy him again because he is the most sweetest guy, and the most trustworthy so you would think that would go in his benefit. But I view him as a friend and the spark has vanished.
I would love to meet someone who could maintain the spark AND be my closest friend and confidante, but honestly I have such a tainted view of men in general I doubt it could ever happen that way.
I am working on changing my bizzarre way of thinking though.
