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forum self v real life

FemMecha

01001100 01101111 01110110 01100101 00100000 01101
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
14,068
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496
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sp/sx
I suspect the impressions can be different in virtual and real contexts even if the person is thinking and acting the same. Introverts seem much more long-winded and active in conversations, and humor can translate differently. People can also subconsciously only show certain compartments of who they are. People sometimes seem meaner than they typically are, and people can also seem nicer and more reasonable. It all depends what mindset they are in when posting.

I'm not intentionally different at all, but I'd suspect I seem more outspoken online because I have time to formulate my thoughts.
 

Hitoshi-San

New member
Joined
Jun 26, 2014
Messages
1,078
MBTI Type
esfp
Enneagram
???
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sp/so
I'm pretty much the same on here as I am in real life. I've met people in real life who I am myself around and open with. My real life isn't anything particularly amazing - or tragic- it just kind of is. My family isn't super close, but we're not constantly at war, my friends' relationships with me aren't always perfect, but we're people. I will say though, I haven't seen/been involved in as many arguments as I have in real life, which, you know, surprises me a little. But other than that, I don't think there's a difference that I notice.
 

Smilephantomhive

Active member
Joined
Aug 11, 2015
Messages
3,352
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ISTJ
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6w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
I'm definitely open here, and I'm better at communicating. Offline I tend to have choppy (for lack of a better word) speech. And that's if I'm saying anything at all. I probably appear meaner Irl since I don't have time to come up with a polite response. Sometimes I say really stupid things Irl.
 

wolfnara

New member
Joined
Jul 22, 2015
Messages
508
MBTI Type
ISFJ
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sx/sp
I am similar irl. i'm not sure what my impression is on this forum :D
 

prplchknz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2007
Messages
34,420
MBTI Type
yupp
I think I'm more reserved and less playful on the forum than real life.

good that i misread this, first cuz i thought you were saying the reverse and i was worried you were a stick in the mud.
 

Null

-
Joined
May 15, 2015
Messages
315
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
I'm much more relaxed in real life and don't overthink everything I'm saying five times. Way too many people are reading what you're posting here.
 

danseen

New member
Joined
Oct 30, 2013
Messages
781
MBTI Type
INTP
i'm little different...i stand my ground whenever i need to.
 

Lexicon

Temporal Mechanic
Staff member
Joined
Sep 28, 2008
Messages
12,523
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JINX
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5w6
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sp/sx
I'm probably about the same irl. I'm more of a smartass here, at times, but that's only because text grants me the time to generate that sort of response. I can't always hold up the banter on my feet, as it were.
 

/DG/

silentigata ano (profile)
Joined
Mar 19, 2009
Messages
4,601
I'm not intentionally different at all, but I'd suspect I seem more outspoken online because I have time to formulate my thoughts.

Yup. I think that's how it is for most people.

-------

In many ways, I'm very similar to how I am in real life. I'm still gleefully weird and I love how it makes people laugh.

However, in other ways, I'm also very different from how I am in real life. Online, I'm extremely open. You can ask me almost anything and I'll be free to share it. Depressive thoughts? Homicidal fantasies? Sex dreams? I'll share almost anything here, especially how I'm feeling on a day to day basis.

In person, I'm extremely reserved and don't like being the center of attention.

So in many respects, and like others say, I feel like my true self on the internet. It's always been the place I come to talk about things that bother me, or just to generally be free to say whatever I wish.

I also tend to speak WAY more fluidly here because, as many say, I have time to think about it and revise it before posting. In real life, I can sometimes sound like I'm drunk even though I'm not.
 

melpomene

New member
Joined
Oct 24, 2015
Messages
32
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
1
Instinctual Variant
so
I'm way more friendly and considerate of other people's viewpoints online. In real life I tend to sum things up very blatently, give people my honest opinion or advice over a situation and leave it at that. I'm known for being the one that tells others what they should do, but I don't do that online for some reason.
 

Ene

Active member
Joined
Aug 16, 2012
Messages
3,574
MBTI Type
iNfj
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5w4
I'm way funnier in real life.
 

Forever

Permabanned
Joined
Aug 30, 2013
Messages
8,550
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3w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Generally I'm viewed more serious online. But I somewhat mastered the way of being friendlier too. :shrug: And I'm still sort of serious/playful in real life. I don't follow the whole "are you in my clan thing?" I mean if you are a friendly person and you've clearly shown it for whatever amount of time, then yeah you're going to see the more imaginative side of me.
 

Poki

New member
Joined
Dec 4, 2008
Messages
10,436
MBTI Type
STP
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I don't just randomly jump into conversations in real life
 

hjgbujhghg

I am
Joined
Jun 6, 2013
Messages
3,326
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INFP
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4w3
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sx/so
I think I am far more extroverted in the communication here, than in real life, but I guess that's understandable since the form of the debates is written and more or less anonymous.

I also think I tend to act more self confident or as tough here while I am far more insecure, anxious and introverted in real life.
 

Coriolis

Si vis pacem, para bellum
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Apr 18, 2010
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27,501
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5w6
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sp/sx
I don't just randomly jump into conversations in real life
Nor do I, but that's sort of the point here, so when in Rome . . .

Seriously, that's one thing I enjoy about the forum. If I post in a topic of interest, I can assume the other participants are interested as well, so I'm not boring someone who doesn't care.
 

Mole

Permabanned
Joined
Mar 20, 2008
Messages
20,282
Our forum self can be anything we like, while our real self is tied to reality. So there is a disjunction between our forum self and our real self.

This disjunction leaves the psychologically vulnerable open to predators such as bullies, group bullies, manipulators, and the sexually damaged.

I notice that Facebook is now requiring members to declare their real identity. Should we follow Facebook?
 

chubber

failed poetry slam career
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Oct 18, 2013
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Showbread

climb on
Joined
Oct 3, 2013
Messages
2,298
MBTI Type
ESFJ
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3w2
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so/sp
I am much more controlled, and much less snarky on the forum than in real life. Part of that is because I have to actually type out my thoughts which seems to serve as a filter on the forum. IRL I tend to just kind of blurt out whatever I'm thinking, which sometimes ends up being offensive, dumb, off topic, or, if I get lucky it will be perfectly timed snark. Either way, forum Showbread is kind of like the "lite" version of Showbread.
 

DiscoBiscuit

Meat Tornado
Joined
Apr 13, 2009
Messages
14,794
Enneagram
8w9
I am different on here vs irl. Mostly that is reflected in the fact that I'm pretty outgoing and expressive and feel most comfortable expressing myself verbally. I can write somewhat well, but nothing compared to the way I speak. Frequently I find myself wishing that I was talking to the person I'm interacting with here. Thoughts that sometimes take me hours to write and construct into posts I could verbally cover in 10 minutes with greater eloquence. It's one of the ways I think online communication hobbles me.

I'm observant irl and can get to know folks quickly irl, probably because I cue so strongly to nonverbal stuff and am such a strong verbal communicater. That being the case I have a very hard time getting to really know folks here. Only through extended one on one interactions like I havehad with some of the older members, do I really gets sense of who they are. The people in my day to day life demographically are very different from the people I encounter here. That also plays a role.

One of the biggest things that influences the irl online difference I think is how long one has been on the forum. I was more open when I first got here, but then there also weren't grievances with extant members to worry about then. Ones posting history follows you around, and sometimes it can be hard to discuss something when people are more concerned with settling old scores.

I'm way funnier Irl. I also don't get into deep down beliefs discussions irl. I'm more chill irl too, but I'm also attacked much less frequently there as well.

I'm.grateful for my time here though. If not for the hours I've spent talking politics here, I wouldn't be as confident or we'll versed in my views as I am irl. I have a hard time getting into fluff stuff here. Much more so than irl. But I also have a hard time staying close with people I don't see face to face regularly. I think that so much of the way I understand people is wrapped up in talking with them face to face, that I have a hard time prioritizing relationships with ppl where I don't get to do that regularly. Which I think is why I prefer talking policy and stuff here and not getting to know you fluff stuff.

You get very little of what it's like to know me irl on here. You will have a better understanding of my politics tho obviously. I would say that you see a part of me here, and no small part at that. But the picture will always be incomplete without knowing me irl.
 
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