[QUOTE
One thing ENFJs could do more to have their emotional needs met is to open up more about themselves. ENFJs are good at making other people feel good and finding out all about them, but they can hold back their inner self. As an INFP, I am best at meeting the needs of people when they open up to me. INFPs are known for having people confide in them and being good listeners and offering a lot of insight and advice, but I swear you ENFJs can be hard nuts.
I can prod my ENFJ friends and they just brush everything off with a joke.... On occasion one will dig deeper into their head and pull something out to share, and that's when our bond strengthens and I can bust out my skills.
Yeah but this is exactly what wasn't enough. Just listening and then forgetting to call and initiate..initiate anything...and then I noticed INFP's or this one is reflexive to a stressed phone caller and she will get up to talk with the person needing help.
And I just kinda realized I am just one more distressed person and I can share my inner self with her and like one other person period and she can't even take initiate, have
A facial expression, or verbal appreciation. SO I stopped calling and she fell off the face of the planet...way to go INFP's. Share my inner self and all I got was this....
[/QUOTE]
Hey! Don't dump on all of us, some of us can be quite pleasant and delightful!
Ok, now I'm a little bit confused here. But I'll address what I understand. Maybe things will clear up for me as I go.
Hmmmm. Initiating, I've had the opposite problem personally. I contact other people, but they are very busy and take a while to get back to you. "I know lots of people, I constantly have to let old people "go" to make room for dealing with all the new people." With that said, initiating generally isn't oe of our strengths, and even when we do its still very P "Hey, wanna do something sometime?" It could also be that they didn't wanna interrupt you [my ENFJ pal has a very busy social life and doesnt tend to answer her phone because of that], or maybe they didn't feel it was appropriate/expected to initiate something. Sometimes when we deal with people who are "very particular" we are afraid we'll offend their particularness.
We do to have facial expressions! Just not that many, or too too often, or too intensely [or else it IS too intensely]. Maybe your INFP "friend" smokes a lot of dope and doesn't connect with people???
what does "reflexive to a stressed phone caller" mean??? and "she will get up to talk with the person needing help. "??? did she cut off your phone call? did she quit your phone call to talk to console someone else face to face? I don't understand what is being said here.
How well did you know this person? Why did you say you " can share my inner self with her", or more to the point how much did you share that you qualify it as that? I could talk for hours about myself and my life and still not "share my inner self with someone." My point is what you consider "sharing your innerself" and what they consider "sharing their innerself" need not be the same.
Have you known other INFP's? Not all of us are particularly "well developed", and some definitely live more in their own heads/fantasy worlds than do others. [In defense to INFP's, I think other people would wish that "the real world" more closely resembles the "fantasy world" of any INFP's living "in their own fantasy world", ie we are idealists and dreamers, our dreams/hopes tend to be pleasant, at least more pleasant than the real world thats for sure]
We generally aren't the life of the party, or social butterflies, or really very social. We excel one on one. We can get into others heads and help heal them. ENFJs tend to be VERY social creatures. There are definitely some big differences/preferences there.
