being specific enough?

[prplchknz]

I was wondering how many people have this problem with asking a question, and you think it's been specific but then people tell you that you're being to vague. And you can't figure out how to be less vague, because to you it's not vague at all. It makes perfect sense in your head.

 

[King sns]

I get accused of being vague when i'm not sure what i'm trying to say. Or, i've had the thought, I just can't put it into words. So this happens to me a lot. I am almost always able to make my question more clear by the second try. And sometimes I can do it for other people, to. I get what they are saying, so I can clarify for them.

 

[nightning]

I'm always too vague according to my parents (they're SJs). I guess they want more examples than theories... and I'm not giving them enough of a description.

It's like I'll give them a generalization based on what I noticed in the past... my impression of the situation. Then they'll ask for examples. How did I come up with that statement, and I couldn't recall specific instances to back it up. At least not right away... the memories eventually comes to me... but not until the conversation is long over.

So I guess I know exactly what they mean by "vague", but I can't comply to their standards. For most Ns... they understand what I mean more or less... or will question the approach I take less often.

 

[prplchknz]

I have the same problem with remember details or specific scenerios. Like the fact something bugs me can't really bug me unless I have something concrete.

 

[nozflubber]

I'm often the one asking for clarification, because I often suspect the intention of an overly vague question is to get into my psyche. "What the hell is goin on with you noz?" .... I'll be like, "I dunno, what IS up with me? My underwear might be too tight"

 

[ThatGirl]

I was wondering how many people have this problem with asking a question, and you think it's been specific but then people tell you that you're being to vague. And you can't figure out how to be less vague, because to you it's not vague at all. It makes perfect sense in your head.

What?

 

[LostInNerSpace]

I have a hard time with words. I'm often vague because being more specific would require more effort than I can budget for at that time.

 

[Gauche]

Well, my thinking processes are vague all the time, I cannot do without vague things; though when I speak I realise that the other person probably won't understand what I'm saying, so I try to translate to their own level, and simplify (and then it's harder to bring out exactly what I thought about, but it's better than not be understood at all)

EDIT: And I hate when someone speak to me like to little child. Then don't tell you what they want, only suggest something unspecific. Like "Will you help me"? and wait for my answer, or "What's wrong with you?", or "Oh you made it so well, how did you done it"?

 

[01011010]

I really dislike having to spell it all out, or list every single step. Why can't people just make the connection.

 

[nolla]

I am too vague for myself. I struggle to get the idea out of my head. So, I answered yes.

My room mate and I often debate over things and in the end (after an hour or so) we realize that we have been talking from so different perspectives that they aren't even the same subject anymore. Hah, so there you go. I don't think that it is only my problem, though. I've been thinking for a while now that our subjective realities are really a lot different. I mean, a lot!

 

[BerberElla]

I really dislike having to spell it all out, or list every single step. Why can't people just make the connection.

I feel the same way lol except when it's me needing things spelled out, then I see what a hypocrite I can be.

I'm always accused of being vague, when i try to narrow it down I can become really impatient because I can't really explain everything that I think properly.