[Type 7] B*tch-slap a Seven!

[Kasper]

The issue of blind spots was brought up in another thread and it has me curious, what do non-sevens see as the weaknesses that sevens often have that they may not be aware of?

Naturally sevens may reply with first hand experience, of course.



ETA: Feel free to b*tch-slap a seven via nohari here

 

[ragashree]

Off the top of my head:

1) Running away from stuff
2) Evading responsibility
3) Being scared of comittment
4) Avoidant behaviour
5) Not facing up to things
6) Thinking the grass is always greener
7) Being irresolute
8) Fobbing people off
9) Making excuses for failings
10) Not following through

Or are these ten different ways of describing one gigantic type 7 issue?

 

[Kasper]

Off the top of my head:

1) Running away from stuff
2) Evading responsibility
3) Being scared of comittment
4) Avoidant behaviour
5) Not facing up to things
6) Thinking the grass is always greener
7) Being irresolute
8) Fobbing people off
9) Making excuses for failings
10) Not following through

Or are these ten different ways of describing one gigantic type 7 issue?

All true, most of that falls under avoidant, impulsive and indulgent habits. I don't expect that they are blind spots to most 7s, it's likely the behaviour that's related to them is though.

I want to go deeper.

 

[ragashree]

All true, most of that falls under avoidant, impulsive and indulgent habits. I don't expect that they are blind spots to most 7s, it's likely the behaviour that's related to them is though.

I want to go deeper.

But often the blind spots are self-created, due to the fact that one of the things that is most persistently avoided is facing up to the consequences of previous actions (including those caused by avoidance). I think that going around in circles of self-perpetuating avoidance and self-distraction can help to shut a lot out of awareness - which if it was in awareness would have to be agknowledged, and maybe actually dealt with.

 

[Z Buck McFate]

9) Making excuses for failings

I knew an e7 who was so good at making excuses for things that he could convince most people (at least, those who didn’t know him well- and he’d instinctively avoid bouncing reality off of people who’d give him an answer he wouldn’t like) that his actions were justified- which enabled him to believe it himself. So I guess his blind spot was that his proclivity to manipulate was so out of control that he had absolutely no respect for anyone else’s version of reality if it meant he had to spend a single moment doing something he didn’t want to do: yet he was completely blind to the fact that he was disrespecting anyone. In order to avoid feelings of unpleasantness- he’d just avoid his responsibility to something or someone and come up with a convincing justification. As long as he could get *someone* to believe him, he felt convinced it was true (which is why I say it enabled him).

edit, also: He always felt 'manipulated' when someone tried pointing out that he was being disrespectful- which, of course, was actually just him projecting his own manipulation.

 

[Kasper]

But often the blind spots are self-created, due to the fact that one of the things that is most persistently avoided is facing up to the consequences of previous actions (including those caused by avoidance). I think that going around in circles of self-perpetuating avoidance and self-distraction can help to shut a lot out of awareness - which if it was in awareness would have to be acknowledged, and maybe actually dealt with.

Indeed, that comes down to awareness about an issue that is specific to the individual though, doesn't it? The avoidance/lack of discipline etc is the common 7 theme, what is being avoided is unique. It would create blind spots in regards to specific knowledge, the cause shouldn't be a blind spot, it just may not be acknowledged.

My issue here is I'm attempting to ask what my blind spots are, which of course would be things that I'm unaware of, so I can't find an accurate way to ask it, as I'm unaware

 

[Kasper]

I knew an e7 who was so good at making excuses for things that he could convince most people (at least, those who didn’t know him well- and he’d instinctively avoid bouncing reality off of people who’d give him an answer he wouldn’t like) that his actions were justified- which enabled him to believe it himself. So I guess his blind spot was that his proclivity to manipulate was so out of control that he had absolutely no respect for anyone else’s version of reality if it meant he had to spend a single moment doing something he didn’t want to do: yet he was completely blind to the fact that he was disrespecting anyone. In order to avoid feelings of unpleasantness- he’d just avoid his responsibility to something or someone and come up with a convincing justification. As long as he could get *someone* to believe him, he felt convinced it was true (which is why I say it enabled him).

edit, also: He always felt 'manipulated' when someone tried pointing out that he was being disrespectful- which, of course, was actually just him projecting his own manipulation.

Ah, that kind of take helps. Specific experiences with seeing 7s in action from a point of view that they are unaware. It's the discrepancy between the 7s intention or understanding of their actions vs anothers impression of their actions.

Guess I'm looking for a johari for 7s.

 

[ragashree]

Indeed, that comes down to awareness about an issue that is specific to the individual though, doesn't it? The avoidance/lack of discipline etc is the common 7 theme, what is being avoided is unique. It would create blind spots in regards to specific knowledge, the cause shouldn't be a blind spot, it just may not be acknowledged.

My issue here is I'm attempting to ask what my blind spots are, which of course would be things that I'm unaware of, so I can't find an accurate way to ask it, as I'm unaware

Ahh, now if you want to make it personal, perhaps it would help to actually talk about some specific things you've avoided. The act of bringing them into awareness could be therapeutic in itself!

 

[Kasper]

Ahh, now if you want to make it personal, perhaps it would help to actually talk about some specific things you've avoided. The act of bringing them into awareness could be therapeutic in itself!

You name it, I've avoided it!

I'm great with facing personal theoretical shortcomings, shocking with facing hard-cold things in reality that have to be done.

For instance, I'll spend a lifetime attempting to understand every aspect of myself and others so I can improve my core being, but I won't pay my electricity bill on time cause I can't be bothered. Yet at the same time I understand that facing reality is always better than avoiding it and things are rarely as difficult as they seem before you face them... still don't.

Reality is my nemesis.

 

[InTheFlesh]

1.Rationalizing everything to make them look like they did nothing wrong. One of my best friends does this and it makes me want to hit him with a golf club.

2.Ignoring everyones feelings and emotions in generall. He also does this and in turn he causes people to hate him or think he's a jerk.

3.Having a tendency to think they're better than everyone else. Most 7's I know really need to learn how to keep their ego in check

 

[Aleksei]

Guess I'm looking for a johari for 7s.

You're actually looking for a Nohari for 7's.

 

[Kasper]

1.Rationalizing everything to make them look like they did nothing wrong. One of my best friends does this and it makes me want to hit him with a golf club.

How does he do this?

You're actually looking for a Nohari for 7's.

True dat.

 

[Aleksei]

I decided to go ahead and make one. Feel free to add it to the OP.

 

[InTheFlesh]

How does he do this?

For example, if he offends someone and they bring it up, he makes it seem like since he doesn't hold emotions in conversations that others shouldn't either and tries to make them look bad for doing it.

I'm really sorry if I offended you, I just have a lot of built up anger towards this particular 7. You seem much more aware and ahead of him on trying to work things out with people

 

[Kasper]

Kickass Aleksei!

I'm really sorry if I offended you, I just have a lot of built up anger towards this particular 7.

Not offended in the slightest, t'was a question that came from curiosity, not emotion just want to understand how someone's behaviour seems from a non-7 pov.

Share more perceptions if you have any.

Is one of the issues that he's argumentative?

 

[InTheFlesh]

His arguing doesn't bother me if it's just for the sake of arguing, but it does annoy me when he can't admit that he's wrong which ends up being around 65% of the time

I'm a particularly argumentative INFJ anyways

 

[Giggly]

I want to go deeper.

Why?

 

[Kasper]

Why?

I think part of that can be put back on my ENTPness, I can't work well with something I don't understand, I have to pull it apart and see it for what it is before I can move forward.

I learn about myself by evaluating myself. I'm not interested in only focusing on the positive, I like, and even thrive with negative criticism as it gives me something to work on improving, thing is if no one ever tells me, and I can't see it, then I'll never change.

Forward movement is important to me, I can't be static.

It can lead to unnecessary over analysis at times, but I like going deep cause if I fully understand something I won't need to go over it again.

 

[FDG]

Off the top of my head:

1) Running away from stuff
2) Evading responsibility
3) Being scared of comittment
4) Avoidant behaviour
5) Not facing up to things
6) Thinking the grass is always greener
7) Being irresolute
8) Fobbing people off
9) Making excuses for failings
10) Not following through

Or are these ten different ways of describing one gigantic type 7 issue?

But...but....we are fun!!!

 

[Salomé]

1.Rationalizing everything to make them look like they did nothing wrong. One of my best friends does this and it makes me want to hit him with a golf club.

2.Ignoring everyones feelings and emotions in generall. He also does this and in turn he causes people to hate him or think he's a jerk.

3.Having a tendency to think they're better than everyone else. Most 7's I know really need to learn how to keep their ego in check

These are narcissistic tendencies which I also associate with unhealthy 7s. I have very limited (read no) IRL experience with healthy 7s. I honestly don't see any of this being relevant to you though, Trin.