Gawain
New member
- Joined
- May 16, 2015
- Messages
- 76
- MBTI Type
- INFP
- Enneagram
- 4w5
- Instinctual Variant
- sx/so
No idea. I don't really think of myself as someone who feels shame often. When I do, it's because I've hurt somebody. So I do everything I can to rectify the situation and make sure I don't do it again. Problem solved. Now that I read that, I think maybe my 5 wing comes into play, here. At any rate, my 5 wing definately comes into play when I'm trying to figure out why the theorists in question name shame as a defining factor of 4s. I think about it a lot, and then I double-guess myself sometimes.I could be wrong, but according to theorists, image types primarily deal with shame. It doesn't look like typical shame, though. So what is it actually like for 4s?
It really depends on the person and how much I've already dealt with that day. I work in customer service, so I'm used to being an emotional punching-bag. Generally, I can take anything and it has little effect. After a long week of hell, anything might be the straw that broke the camel's back. I don't internalize it if it's a stranger, though. I explode, and everyone knows exactly my thoughts and feelings on the subject when I blow.If someone criticizes you about something that you feel is unjustified, what is your inward/outward reaction? How do you process these kind of accusations? Or do you just let them pass?
As far as family and close friends, I will be indignant and argue. But I will also overanalyze their perspective to learn as much as I can about my possible shortcomings. Can't fix it if you don't know what's broken. And if it's not me that's broken, their perception is. So either way, I find the problem and work to rectify it. With varied success.
Dear lord, NO! If anything, that puts me into a "woe is me" state. When I do the thing that other types call "self-pity", it's usually a reflection on my feelings on the state of evil in the world at large. Whether I am on the recieving end of that evil is really incidental. Usually, the reason I am more likely to notice evil when I am on the recieving end is because I'm ridiculously oblivious to the world around me. I'm working on that. But it's hard to remember to pay attention to what's going on around me when I'm doing all this self-work and trying to grow at the same time. Just one of the paradoxes of trying to be a good person, I guess.Can this
get you out of "woe is me" and if so for how long? :hi: