VILLANELLE
New member
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2016
- Messages
- 731
- MBTI Type
- ESFP
- Enneagram
- 261
- Instinctual Variant
- so/sp
I just can't tell if I'm ENFJ or ENFP. I used to type as INFJ and I still often get that, so I don't know if I'm faking things or if I really am my type. I get different results each time but I know you have to type based on how you are usually, not in a moment, or whatever. But I feel like I'm changing a lot. I don't know. I could possibly have mental illness (shoot me in the foot but it's self-diagnosed, I know something isn't right with me, so...) and I feel like that's affecting it. I don't know. And I still struggle with my Enneagram type, like I'm not a right fit.
See, lately I'm drawn to sad shit. I've always been drawn to sad shit, but this time, instead of romanticizing it, I just don't know why I'm drawn to it. My mental state makes me drawn to it, I don't really like it. I'm not the most outgoing person, not that talkative, but I enjoy being in groups. I enjoy the company, I like knowing what's going on. I'm not the life of a room or party, but they don't drain me like they used to. I just like being around people. ENFPs are the introverts of extraverts as they say. I've been apart of the ENFP Subreddit for awhile on Reddit... so now I feel like I'm one of them.
I used to want to stand out and be different, and I tried hard. I tried so so hard, I thought if nobody liked me, fuck it! But the more I tried hard, I realized the more ordinary I am. And now I'm okay with that! I'm okay with being normal! The "weird, goth" or whatever I tried to fit into, that's not me anymore! Although I do still wear a lot of black and I don't put much into my appearance... but whatever. My insecurities, that's another story. I'm not the most confident person, but what is self-esteem, anyways? I try to remember to treat it as a concept.
I feel like I have a lot of energy, but it's quiet energy, but I just don't feel introverted anymore? Sure, I do need my alone time, especially after work or the end of the day, but I'm not exhausted and it's not this re-charging my batteries feeling.. but it is, but it's just DIFFERENT.
I don't know, guys, I just feel very very lost. I know this isn't something MBTI can fix, I just feel lost, like I'm not really my type, or any of them, but I'm not saying MBTI and enneagram is fake.
I'm trying to read up on the different types and see which one is more like me, and I'm torn on ENFP/ENFJ, basically. But I feel like my Percieving is more developed, I've heard that about my writing, I guess.
Sigh.
See, lately I'm drawn to sad shit. I've always been drawn to sad shit, but this time, instead of romanticizing it, I just don't know why I'm drawn to it. My mental state makes me drawn to it, I don't really like it. I'm not the most outgoing person, not that talkative, but I enjoy being in groups. I enjoy the company, I like knowing what's going on. I'm not the life of a room or party, but they don't drain me like they used to. I just like being around people. ENFPs are the introverts of extraverts as they say. I've been apart of the ENFP Subreddit for awhile on Reddit... so now I feel like I'm one of them.
I used to want to stand out and be different, and I tried hard. I tried so so hard, I thought if nobody liked me, fuck it! But the more I tried hard, I realized the more ordinary I am. And now I'm okay with that! I'm okay with being normal! The "weird, goth" or whatever I tried to fit into, that's not me anymore! Although I do still wear a lot of black and I don't put much into my appearance... but whatever. My insecurities, that's another story. I'm not the most confident person, but what is self-esteem, anyways? I try to remember to treat it as a concept.
I feel like I have a lot of energy, but it's quiet energy, but I just don't feel introverted anymore? Sure, I do need my alone time, especially after work or the end of the day, but I'm not exhausted and it's not this re-charging my batteries feeling.. but it is, but it's just DIFFERENT.
I don't know, guys, I just feel very very lost. I know this isn't something MBTI can fix, I just feel lost, like I'm not really my type, or any of them, but I'm not saying MBTI and enneagram is fake.
I'm trying to read up on the different types and see which one is more like me, and I'm torn on ENFP/ENFJ, basically. But I feel like my Percieving is more developed, I've heard that about my writing, I guess.
Sigh.