Small talk I've heard all before. But what is really going on in a persons mind and soul..that's incredibly interesting to hear. Makes me feel alive 
It's comparable to you having an 'AHA'-moment when experiencing a break-through with your abstract theories, I would wager.
That's what makes me tick. I enjoy understanding others and bonding. It's a nice fuzzy feeling
I disagree with you on that
Hehe, well I didn't really think INTx congregated in group, other than online
And the reason I take things personal is because I tend to cut the small talk and go straight for actually getting to know the person. And yes, it might be why sometimes I get hurt. It's also very rewarding when that connection does happen though. However, if that connection isn't there, I tend to disconnect myself unless I really do find them interesting. At this point I do not do the 'feeling'-thing though, just the curiosity-thing.
Like you, I do do the small talk when forced into it, but generally it bores me. I prefer a more personal one-on-one with a person though, or a good banter session in group (a chance to be silly is always fun), but that's it. Hence first encounters try my patience often, till I can figure out when it is safe to banter or get more personal. I guess what I'm looking for with this thread is a way to cut through all the small talk and get to the good stuff
I don't mind rejection as such, but it does make me wonder as to the reason I guess. If you let me know how to relate to you, whether or not in this deep way or in a superficial one, I'm all ok with that. It's the uncertainty of not knowing however that drives me mental
And thank you for not nitpicking at my analogy and understanding it the way I meant it
I never said they have the monopoly on intelligence. But I do tend to get talking with I's more than E's. I find ENTP's also very interesting, but that's not the type I usually end up talking to (with a few exceptions). You also misunderstood what I want. I want to understand. I do very much enjoy the rare occasions I can make a deep emotional connection, but I'm fine with just knowing where I stand with them as well and keeping it superficial. It's the uncertainty I'm trying to get a grip on I know connections with other people are not high on their list of priorities, but when they do make one, it's definitely worth the wait, IME.
I usually know when a connection isn't working. What I'm uncertain about sometimes, is why. Occasionally it's clear: differences in values, opinions that are too sensitive to debate, or just a general dislike of too much interaction, or just plain rubbing each other the wrong way and not being able to get on the same page. And sometimes you can still readjust and superficially connect when you know what the cause is. When you don't know the cause, you cannot fix it
Grin, it tends to get confirmed later down the line
Don't discount it coz it's a feeling. And there are different gradations in connections, btw.
Depend on the person. I've had all kinds of connections with people. But I've had several people being surprised at telling me things they tell no one, and I consider that pretty deep and special. I also tend to have conversations with those people for hours on end about personal stuff. The most intimate connections are often with people that over time become soulmates. And yes, I do check if they feel the same way
I know, and I don't mind your sceptiscism
I realize that it doesn't work that way for you. And I wish I could take you to my world and show it to you, so you could understand. But I'm happy just sharing how I understand the world, if you are in need of such answers.
So how is one to tell them apart with NT's? I mean, when you know someone already, then it usually isn't that hard to tell, but when you've just met them and they make a potentially hurtful comment, it can be hard. What are the telltale signs that we shouldn't take it serious, and when do you actually mean it? Or, do you use those remarks to test the waters yourself? Help us poor confused NF's understand...*goes hide*
