How is your type misunderstood?

[FemMecha]

In what ways do you find yourself and/or your MBTI type most commonly misunderstood? I suggest you include links and quotes to verify the MBTI trait you mention just to keep things consistent. Personal traits should also be noted as such. This is just a suggestion to keep things from veering into unfounded assumptions to add to the confusion.

Areas of misunderstanding often include:
What people mistakenly read into your comments
What people assume about your character
What people assume about your abilities
How people interpret your actions
In general, how people are most critical of you based on your type.

 

[Metamorphosis]

People frequently think that we:

1. are arrogant
2. don't listen to people's opinions

,when in fact:

1. our lack of social confidence mixed with our social confidence causes us to appear this way
2. we use our N to dismiss stupid stuff before we finish hearing it

 

[Langrenus]

Good thread. But far too much effort to dig out quotes and links, although it is nice to see an attempt at some form of evidential rigour. I will absolve myself of guilt by stating simply that I know I could find evidence of most of the thoughts listed below, if only I could be bothered.

What people mistakenly read into your comments - that they're literal, or that I'm not aware of the (intentional) irony inherent in what is said/posted. This is a cardinal sin.

What people assume about your character - No idea. Bookish? Computer-literate? Cold, analytical, uncaring, unable to gauge the emotions of others and adapt communication styles accordingly, unwilling to take the points of others onboard? Overly defensive when challenged? Intelligent, theoretical, lacking in practical skills (including social skills?).

How people interpret your actions - literally, I imagine. Which would be a mistake.

 

[The Ü™]

People frequently think that we:

1. are arrogant
2. don't listen to people's opinions

,when in fact:

1. our lack of social confidence mixed with our social confidence causes us to appear this way
2. we use our N to dismiss stupid stuff before we finish hearing it

I think we disagree on less than 80 percent.

People think I'm:

1. Insane because I look at things from a different (yet logical) perspective.
2. Impatient.
3. Stubborn (when in actuality, I just know what I want).
4. Insensitive (though I don't take comments about me up the ass).

 

[Metamorphosis]

I think we disagree on less than 80 percent.

True. I exaggerated and really didn't intend it to seem like a bad thing, eventhough it probably came off that way.

 

[Llenyd]

I've had people assume I don't like them due to the introversion or "head in the clouds" aspects.

Quoting from the Personality Page profile:

The INTP is likely to be very shy when it comes to meeting new people. On the other hand, the INTP is very self-confident and gregarious around people they know well, or when discussing theories which they fully understand.

When my current manager (who I think is ESFP) first took over the department, she thought I hated her. She saw me be loud and boisterous around others then be detached and impersonal when interacting with her. She thought the difference in behavior was because I didn't like her.

As for the "head in the clouds" bit, there have been times when I'm walking down the hall lost in thought and not notice people speaking to me. I just keep walking oblivious to anyone trying to get my attention.

I did, though, have someone interpret the introversion in a different, and quite humorous way. I'm very much not a morning person, so I can be much more anti-social early in the day. She was the morning receptionist at the time and would greet me as I came in. I would give a slight nod of acknowledgment, but keep walking. I never stopped to chat nor gave a cheerful good morning in reply. So she assumed I was a mute. The first time she heard me talk was nearly six months after I had started working here.

 

[Ferdinand]

When I think I'm right I can be very confident and uncompromising, which leads people to think I'm arrogant or stubborn or impatient or whatever. I'm also quite prone to ironic comments, which leads people to think I'm mean or simply weird. People thinking I'm weird is not a misperception, though.

 

[Natrushka]

INTJ

People think because I am independent and self assured I don't have feelings. My tendancy to see speak about things that I know using declaratory terms can cause people to think I'm arrogant; I'm not, I just *know* in this case. When I don't know, I don't. Also, I like to live with an idea before I act on it, if you ask me do I want to go here, or do this, I need to think about it, get used to the idea, work it into the things I already had in my head up to that point you mentioned it - this makes people think I'm antisocial, when really I just have so much going on inside, I need to reflect.

 

[The Ü™]

True. I exaggerated and really didn't intend it to seem like a bad thing, eventhough it probably came off that way.

I really don't care if others disagree with me. In fact, it actually gives me a sense of self-pride knowing that I have a different perspective!

 

[FemMecha]

It is both interesting and kinda cool that this thread is currently rather flooded with INTJs. Very interesting...

(actually INTs are often misunderstood and possibly the Js a little moreso?)

 

[The Ü™]

It is both interesting and kinda cool that this thread is currently rather flooded with INTJs. Very interesting...

(actually INTs are often misunderstood and possibly the Js a little moreso?)

Well, I think an INTP is more enjoyable to be around to SP types because they, too, tend to enjoy things more. I guess SPs value them for their knowledge and easy-going approach, but they're afraid to confront the xNTJ because he/she has more of a temper. P's probably perceive xNTJs as assholes because they seem angry. SJ's perceive xNTJs as rude because of their cynicism.

 

[Natrushka]

I noticed the same, toonia. I also noticed the "similar threads" at the bottom of the page - Intros by INTJs ...

 

[Mycroft]

It is both interesting and kinda cool that this thread is currently rather flooded with INTJs. Very interesting...

(actually INTs are often misunderstood and possibly the Js a little moreso?)

The whole board has been flooded with 'em lately. WHO'S WITH ME FOR A GOOD OLD-FASHIONED PURGING???

 

[Athenian200]

My type? That would be INFJ. How am I misunderstood? Well, a lot of people think I'm boring, rigid, pedantic, and too anxious. I see my own behavior as safe, correct, courteous, and cautious. The difference is in the perspective.

 

[The Ü™]

My type? That would be INFJ. How am I misunderstood? Well, a lot of people think I'm boring, rigid, pedantic, and too anxious. I see my own behavior as safe, correct, courteous, and cautious. The difference is in the perspective.

INxJs are actually even more cautious than ISxJs, methinks. An INxJ's cautiousness can sometimes border on paranoia because of Ni's obsessive over-thinking.

 

[The_Liquid_Laser]

I don't really care so much that I'm misunderstood by most people, since I have a couple people close to me that understand me fairly well. That and it's pretty cool being able to understand others better than they understand you. Having said that here are a few things that you can learn about ENTP's.

1) ENTP's naturally understand almost everything about the world (except one thing). This means, for example, that I will always understand you better than you understand me. However, the one thing that is hard for an ENTP to understand is him/herself.

2) ENTP's often play the devil's advocate. They argue a lot (often for fun), but may or may not believe in the side they are arguing.

3) ENTP's lose focus easily. On a message board we'll stop posting about a topic before other types think the discussion is over. Also our friends might feel slighted if we haven't talked to them in a while. Really it's not personal, we're just distracted with too many other things to remember.

4) ENTP confidence is probably mistaken for arrogance often times.

There that is enough secrets for now. I can't give them all away.

 

[The Ü™]

Does anyone think that forum derailing is partly the Intuitive function at work?

 

[Kyrielle]

Does anyone think that forum derailing is partly the Intuitive function at work?

Probably. As is evidenced by your seemingly random question, which was probably caused by the idea randomly popping into your head. And while it LOOKS like derailing to everyone else, it makes perfect sense to you because there are ever-so-subtle associations between the alleged derailment and the original topic.

And just to rerail this recent derail:

I think INFJs tend to get mistaken for being friendlier than they intend to be. That's not the say that we're assholes or snooty or anything...just we don't really want to be as close as other people think. I think a lot of people don't realise that we're really playing our cards close to the vest, because we may tend to share personal information.

 

[Cindyrella]

People tend to think I'm sweet and innocent because I'm reserved and polite. And that I'm a big pushover.

Actually, I will step up to the plate to defend myself (or my loved ones) or my values if need be. And there's a difference between being a pushover and simply giving credit where credit is due (and I happen to believe EVERYONE has at least one thing they do exceptionally well, and therefore everyone deserves a pat on the back every once in awhile). I'm a big believer in positive reinforcement and the impact it has on productivity, enthusiasm, and morale.

 

[FemMecha]

Well, I think an INTP is more enjoyable to be around to SP types because they, too, tend to enjoy things more. I guess SPs value them for their knowledge and easy-going approach, but they're afraid to confront the xNTJ because he/she has more of a temper. P's probably perceive xNTJs as assholes because they seem angry. SJ's perceive xNTJs as rude because of their cynicism.

Point 1: Is there any reference in MBTI analysis regarding temper and type? It's my understanding that is not related. I don't have a temper at all. I guess that is one of the stereotypes that wearies me. I like to kid around and people will sometimes take it seriously. There is actually suggestion to the contrary for INFJs in particular.

They realize the importance of keeping their emotions in check and not saying things that can damage relationships.

Point 2: INFJs come to decisions easily when it is coherent with their world view. They also are intrigued by spontaneity and can love to break with routine. SJs are more systematic and find derailment of any sort more unsettling.

How INFJs Make Decisions
They tend to make decisions rather quickly if new information matches the vision. If it does not, they will want time to integrate the information into their vision and adjust the vision or reject the information. They might be prone to inaction when they get overwhelmed with the physical realities of a situation or when they have no idea of what the next step should be.

How INFJs Respond to Change
When a change does not match their vision of what is going to happen, they must trust that others are really looking out for the good of the people. This will help them adjust their vision, especially if accompanied by a good argument with a strong rationale and with new insights and evidence.

They often come to team relationships with pre-established expectations but are willing to change if met with new information or new teammates.

Point 3: Another area of frustration comes from assumptions about INFJs as subjective, emotional thinkers.

The quest for more knowledge...the meaning of life, the philosophical questions, my mind is always occupied, and what is exciting is when I get to follow through with an insight and do something. I am an abstract future thinker, looking at things from different perspectives.

Very often in an online discussion my purpose is abstract and distanced. Personal examples are only assumed to be imperfect fragments that suggest a more abstract theory. Many times people will assume my statements are directed at them in a personal way when nothing could be further from my mind. It always shocks me a little and I take care to correct the misunderstanding. I have at times wished I had an NT by my name assuming this misunderstanding would occur less often. I believe I also read someplace that INFJs are one of the most abstract of all the types. I would agree with that for my case. I purposefully avoid thinking in personal terms for the emotional sake of others and because the individual is far too complex to represent all. That is why a principle may be extracted from a single individual or event, but it only has meaning in more universal terms since there is no way to address the vast amount of personal details that apply to one person.

Of course it's entirely possible i have an INTJ twist to me. Ni is definitely dominant and Se not so much. Perhaps the whole Ti Te Fi Fe bit play ring-around-the-rosey inbetween. doot-a-doot-a-doo-doo...