[ESTJ] Ask an ESTJ!

[prplchknz]

I place enough of a dividing line between myself and others, that that would not make me feel better at all.

why do you place so much of a dividing line?

 

[Hawthorne]

[MENTION=4945]EJCC[/MENTION]'s avatar makes me chuckle whenever I see it.

What difficulties, if any, did you have settling on your type? Did you frequently second guess yourself? Did others do the second guessing for you?

 

[EJCC]

why do you place so much of a dividing line?

Probably because I'm the only one I can control. And because humanity at large is always disappointing me.

[MENTION=4945]EJCC[/MENTION]'s avatar makes me chuckle whenever I see it.

What difficulties, if any, did you have settling on your type? Did you frequently second guess yourself? Did others do the second guessing for you?

ESTJ was the very first result I ever got. There was never any question in my mind. It was a LOT harder to decide on Enneagram.

People who don't know me well tend to think I'm a Feeler. Or sometimes an introvert. But no one who knows me well second-guesses my type.

 

[EJCC]

Whoa why did the thread lock? That was weird.

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

Whoa why did the thread lock? That was weird.

The thread locked?

 

[prplchknz]

Probably because I'm the only one I can control. And because humanity at large is always disappointing me.

That's true, but I don't understand why separating yourself so much is a necessity.

Whoa why did the thread lock? That was weird.

I dunno but i thought it was to prevent me from asking more questions. my current question above is still a question but in the form of a statement.

 

[EJCC]

The thread locked?

Yeah, just for a second. Some kind of weird glitch I guess.

That's true, but I don't understand why separating yourself so much is a necessity.

I don't know either. It's not a decision I make, or anything. It's just something I do instinctively.

 

[prplchknz]

I don't know either. It's not a decision I make, or anything. It's just something I do instinctively.

weird. is that a you trait or do other ESTJs do the same thing? who are the other ESTJs so i can ask them?

 

[EJCC]

weird. is that a you trait or do other ESTJs do the same thing? who are the other ESTJs so i can ask them?

I think it's more of an e1 thing.

 

[prplchknz]

I think it's more of an e1 thing.

that makes sense.
[MENTION=20829]Hard[/MENTION] do you do this? and any other 1s.

 

[á´…eparted]

that makes sense.
[MENTION=20829]Hard[/MENTION] do you do this? and any other 1s.

Yes. I put lines everywhere (not just for that situation), and it's largely instinctual. If I didn't I'd go nuts.

 

[Forever]

Yeah, just for a second. Some kind of weird glitch I guess.

I don't know either. It's not a decision I make, or anything. It's just something I do instinctively.

Haha I read this on the activity as that you thread lock instinctively.

 

[Seymour]

that makes sense.
[MENTION=20829]Hard[/MENTION] do you do this? and any other 1s.

I am not an e1, but I do struggle with perfectionism.

I have an unreasonably high set of standards for myself, and then a more forgiving set of standards for others. That helps, on a surface level, prevent spraying my perfectionism all over those around me. If I actually expected others to live up to my ridiculous standards, I'd spend a lot of time angry and frustrated. (And why should they live up to my standards, anyway? They are my standards, and other people didn't sign an agreement to follow them.)

However, the "two sets of standards" is only a crude work-around, because the truth is that my perfectionism does bleed over onto those I am closest to. It also leads to be being critical and harsh with myself, as well. Having unrealistically high standards for oneself is real detriment to self-compassion, which involves learning to treat oneself as a fallible human being who deserves more than harsh criticism when one fails.

Plus, flogging oneself across the finish line in a state of utter exhaustion doesn't really lead to better outcomes in the long run, especially when one does so as a matter of course.

 

[Hawthorne]

It was a LOT harder to decide on Enneagram.

How'd that go?

 

[prplchknz]

I am not an e1, but I do struggle with perfectionism.

I have an unreasonably high set of standards for myself, and then more forgiving set of standards for others. That helps, on a surface level, prevent spraying my perfectionism all over those around me. If I actually expected others to live up to my ridiculous standards, I'd spend a lot of time angry and frustrated. (And why should they live up to my standards, anyway? They are my standards, and other people didn't sign an agreement to follow them.)

However, the "two sets of standards" is only a crude work-around, because the truth is that my perfectionism does bleed over onto those I am closest to. It also leads to be being critical and harsh with myself, as well. Having unrealistically high standards for oneself is real detriment to self-compassion, which involves learning to treat oneself as a fallible human being who deserves more than harsh criticism when one fails.

Plus, flogging oneself across the finish line in a state of utter exhaustion doesn't really lead to better outcomes in the long run, especially when one does so as a matter of course.

this is interesting i need to find some perfectionist and ask them about this. i'm sure they're everywhere.

 

[SD45T-2]

Do you get pleasure at times when you see others in pain or when you cause others pain?

Not usually. And I rarely cause others pain (at least that I know of).

How do you view emotional people?

I guess it depends on what they're emotional about and how mature they are.

Do you see yourself as emotional?

Not normally.

Do you ever fake positive emotions, because you have noticed it gets better results?

Just about never.

Are you very neat and organized?

I'm organized, but not especially neat.

Have you ever done any outdoorsy activities?

I loved whitewater rafting. Too bad I haven't done in since 2006. I've been trying to spend more time on the bike, but it's out of service right now due to technical difficulties.

Have you done them as part of a volunteer program?

Not that I can think of.

How do you think that relates to introverted sensing?

Do you like Bill O'riely? Do either one of your parents like Bill O'riely?

Not really.

What is your deepest fear?

I don't know. I don't think I can quite narrow it down to just one.

Do you see yourself as a know it all?

No.

Do you sometimes act like a know it all?

Maybe occasionally.

Are you good at doing your taxes?

Do you garden?

No, I don't have a yard.

Are you more negative then you are positive? Do you view this as rational?

I'm squarely in the Constrained Vision school of thought, as described by Thomas Sowell (INTJ 512, IMHO) in Conflict of Visions. I also agree with Rory Miller's philosophy of why there will probably never be a totally peaceful society because it's the most cogent explanation I've heard.

[MENTION=4945]EJCC[/MENTION]'s avatar makes me chuckle whenever I see it.

What difficulties, if any, did you have settling on your type? Did you frequently second guess yourself? Did others do the second guessing for you?

I got ESTJ the first time. That was about it.

 

[Sil]

Have you ever done any outdoorsy activities? Have you done them as part of a volunteer program? How do you think that relates to introverted sensing?

I do outdoorsy activities all the time. I'm planning an 8 mile hike this weekend.

I have not done them as part of a volunteer program, but would be open to it. Never came across a group for it so far.

I don't think any of this relates to introverted sensing, unless I wanted to suggest that my outdoor interests were somehow spurred by past associations. Which they aren't. It's more a Fi thing if we want to really, desperately try and make it a cog function thing.

Have you ever done anything off-kilter, or unexpected?

Yes. I climbed out a two-story window once while it was pouring rain and leapt off the ledge to a nearby roof. A distance of about 4-5 feet.

Why? Because I felt like it at the time and it seemed interesting.

Do you like movies about gladiators?

If they're done well, yes.

 

[Sil]

Do you get pleasure at times when you see others in pain or when you cause others pain?
How do you view emotional people?
Do you see yourself as emotional?
Do you ever fake positive emotions, because you have noticed it gets better results?
Do you resent that fact?
Are you very neat and organized?

1. If I dislike them, yes.
2. Depends on how they wield their emotions. Maybe provide an example?
3. Yes.
4. Yes because sometimes it gets better results.
5. Nope. I do it with intent. Why should I resent it?
6. Not at all. Don't let the list deceive you.

 

[Sil]

Question for other ESTJs and for people who know ESTJs: Would you describe ESTJs as being moody and volatile?

We have a reputation as being very emotionally stable and reliable, but my image/impression of myself is that the opposite is frequently true. And because strong and negative emotions can seem so foreign to us, we react to them as if it's the end of the world, even when it really isn't. It feels dramatic, and probably looks dramatic, especially to Feelers, who are used to dealing with those sorts of emotions on a more regular basis.

I am known for being moody. Volatile, no.

My moodiness is more two dimensional than what people might regularly think of when they hear the word "moody." My moods are either calm or angry.

 

[andresimon]

1. If I dislike them, yes.
2. Depends on how they wield their emotions. Maybe provide an example?
3. Yes.
4. Yes because sometimes it gets better results.
5. Nope. I do it with intent. Why should I resent it?
6. Not at all. Don't let the list deceive you.

I meant, do you resent others, because you have to do it that way as opposed to coming out strait out.
Are you, calm and collected around people you know, or more direct?
How do you treat guests in your home? Is treating guests well, important to you?