Compulsive Talking and Its Causes

[BadOctopus]

Have you ever met someone who never seems to stop talking? I don't mean simply a talkative person who is skilled in the art of conversation. I'm referring to a person who dominates every conversation, interrupts others constantly, and doesn't seem to realize that his or her incessant talking is annoying and stressful to other people. What do you suppose causes that? Is it anxiety-related? A symptom of ADD? Or is it just need for attention?

 

[prplchknz]

could be anxiety if i'm expected to talk it happens. well sort of what happens is i'll start talking about some pans or something that i got and i can see the other person getting bored but i can't stop. so if you would stop fucking glaring at me and expecting me to talk this wouldn't fucking happen. damn people!

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

I can usually pick up cues when someone wants me to bug-off in person (not that I'm talkative around most people), but over text-only formats, it gets harder to pick-up on. I'd need something more explicit; I can read too many possible meanings into things.

 

[Jaguar]

What may be annoying and stressful to one could be completely normal to another. I don't wonder if someone is "ill" just because their communication methods differ from mine.

 

[Qlip]

Possibly the need for attention, possibly the need to dominate. Some people think that the way to make things go their way is to be the loudest, and sound the most important. Some people just prefer talking about themselves to talking with people, all of the time.

Some people talk through anxiety, but mostly they do this to fill in the silence and are less prone to interrupting conversations.

 

[Virtual ghost]

What do you suppose causes that? Is it anxiety-related? A symptom of ADD? Or is it just need for attention?

I think that this happens when all those reasons merge.
I know people who fit the profile more or less and that was my conclusion about them. They are not bad people it is just that they trully talk a lot.

 

[Jaguar]

Possibly the need for attention, possibly the need to dominate. Some people think that the way to make things go their way is to be the loudest, and sound the most important. Some people just prefer talking about themselves to talking with people, all of the time.

Some people talk through anxiety, but mostly they do this to fill in the silence and are less prone to interrupting conversations.

Have you dealt with women who go on and on and on and on when talking to you?

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

Have you dealt with women who go on and on and on and on when talking to you?

I pretty much deal with people who do this every workday. I want to say "Can we just get the job done here? I don't care about little Jimmy's karate lesson." I can't say that, though. I can't even have anything in my tone reflect that I'm even thinking that.

 

[Qlip]

Have you dealt with women who go on and on and on and on when talking to you?

Yep. Mostly it bothers me depending on whether me being there is somehow important, or if I could just be replaced by a cardboard cutout. I assume you know someone?

 

[Destiny]

I do know of a person in real life who fits into that profile.

This person is very loud, outgoing and talkative, and people usually dislike this person at first sight.
Conversations with this person often revolve around themselves, and they can often spend hours talking about themselves.

And being the non-judgemental person I am, I decided to ignore their flaws and I got further acquainted with this person, then I realised that this person also happened to lack empathy, often holding grudges with people for years and then taking revenge on their enemies and then bragging about it.

I'm pretty sure this person has some form of undiagnosed illnesses or personality disorder or something, I suspect it might be a combination of ADD and aspergers, who knows.

 

[prplchknz]

wait do you mean people who never shut up? or people who don't talk often but then when expected to sort of babble?

 

[GarrotTheThief]

I actually find that strong silent types are the worst compulsive talkers in selective situations.

I find generally, extroverts, may talk a lot in groups, but one on one, I find the introverts to be the ones who won't stop talking.

I generally talk a lot and compulsively talk about my interests because I have aspergers....but for people without apsergers, I find introverts bare the most traits in similar with me...

Hence one man may be seemingly stoic but actually a diarrhea mouth in another situation.

 

[Jaguar]

Yep. Mostly it bothers me depending on whether me being there is somehow important, or if I could just be replaced by a cardboard cutout. I assume you know someone?

Many. But I extricate myself, eventually.

 

[GarrotTheThief]

An example of a strong stoic type is my friend. He never talks in groups. When we are in groups I talk a lot. But he loves to rap - he is an introvert, and freestyle.

Alone it is a nightmare. It is always about listening to him rap. He won't shut the hell up. If you tell him that you don't want to hear rap he brings up how friendly you were in the group.

He also criticizes and gets embarrassed easy when he brings anyone around and they talk too much in the group...it reminds me of that thread I started about silence being a form of narcissism....the stoic who uses silence to detach and deliver retribution because he expects a reward for their silence.

But yet, when it's just me and him...FLAP FLAP FLAP FLAP FLAP...

This is what I mean by selective introversion.

I find the ones who don't speak in the group want to suck the life out of only one person. Much better to spread the damage, but the "Stoic" tends to only see what they do in the group and use his close friends as a mirror for practicing looking cool to the group - again, could be some mild narcissism going on.

I'm not saying all introverts are like this. But in my experience, they are very clingy and annoying. Just be your own swashbuckling self and don't get mad at me for talking to random people as if they were good friends - as an extrovert I am somewhat of a charmer and this is just my nature, as Tupac says.

I guess what it boils down to is that the Introvert is maintaining a facade of sorts to the group because society turns on them, so they have to learn...sometimes this incubation turns into flat out narcissism.

The extroverts may talk a lot but they speak mostly in groups of three and up.
The introvert clings to others in groups as a life support, and instead unloads their thoughts to that one person.

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

He also criticizes and gets embarrassed easy when he brings anyone around and they talk too much in the group...it reminds me of that thread I started about silence being a form of narcissism....the stoic who uses silence to detach and deliver retribution because he expects a reward for their silence.

I'm silent because I don't want to get involved in some kind of drama that I'm apathetic to. I also know that plenty of people will express one opinion in public, and express an opinion in private that is quite different. Or, they'll like somebody at first, until that person does something in public that they perceive as an embarrassment, and then the opinion will change. I have many good reasons for being silent and holding myself apart from the group.

 

[BadOctopus]

wait do you mean people who never shut up? or people who don't talk often but then when expected to sort of babble?

I don't mean people who babble when they're nervous. I think we all do that from time to time. And I don't mean a chatty person; I actually like them. But conversation should be a give-and-take activity, with both people participating. I'm talking about people who, every time you're with them, they do all the talking, and they barely let you get in a word. It's almost like you might as well not even be there.

 

[Jaguar]

I also know that plenty of people will express one opinion in public, and express an opinion in private that is quite different.

Off with their heads.

 

[prplchknz]

I don't mean people who babble when they're nervous. I think we all do that from time to time. And I don't mean a chatty person; I actually like them. But conversation should be a give-and-take activity, with both people participating. I'm talking about people who, every time you're with them, they do all the talking, and they barely let you get in a word. It's almost like you might as well not even be there.

oh my best friend does this, he does have a diagnosis of adhd autism and bipolar. but i doubt the adhd and autism but i'm not his therapist. i have no problem telling him to shut up. we get along well because we're practically an old married couple and he says he appreciates that i can give it to him straight but i have noticed that when i have issues i can't talk to him because it always go back to him and his problems and i've gotten mad at him for it a few times.

 

[Julius_Van_Der_Beak]

Off with their heads.

I like the beesuit punishment better. Although this fellow seems to enjoy it.

 

[Jaguar]

I like the beesuit punishment better. Although this fellow seems to enjoy it.

You're fucking twisted. I like that.