[ESFJ] what do you guys think of ESFJ girls?

[Skyward]

They're cool once you get to know them. Some of them can be really egocentric though. At least here in California.

... but that's California. ( All the people I know from California (INFJ, ENFJ, INFP) are great people, please have patience with my snarky quip )


Haven't recognized an ESTJ yet, but I do think I know one ESFJ. I can totally agree with the 'well put together'-ness they have, and the perfectionism? I have have a bit of that, too, so I can empathize



( The thing with Fe is that it's a people-mover and uses the status-quo as a reference point. Sometimes when the EFJ thinks people need to be moved, the people don't WANT to be moved, leading to contention because EFJs will push a LOT )

 

[Eagle]

My mom is an ESFJ, 'nuff said.

 

[Magic Poriferan]

Gender distinction basically doesn't matter unless intimate interaction is possible. So, keeping that in mind... Turn the E into an I and I'd be more interested.

 

[NewEra]

My cousin is a female ESFJ. She's very nice, but at times can take things the wrong way. She's helpful and seemingly caring.

 

[Bubbles]

Sister is an ESFJ. As someone who's lived with one for years and years, plus shared a room for half of those years? They're smart, organized when they want to be, friendly, laugh easily...but if you switch on that temper, the angry F will go and go until she says it's not going anymore. There is no reasoning in this state, my friend. You just wait out the storm. The worst part is sharing a normal conversation then getting snapped at because something has been secretly bothering her for awhile. And you cannot convince the ESFJ she's wrong; you just nod and agree, nod and agree. In public, ESFJs are very good about keeping anger and emotion in check. At home, for some reason, they feel they can share their moods and nagging because they'll be loved regardless.

If you're looking for a relationship? Patience, patience, patience. That's all I can say.

Other than that, they're wonderful.

 

[swordpath]

There's some very attractive attributes to the ESFJs. The caring, the social ease, the sense of duty, the youthful spunk they seem to have towards life.

 

[lorkan]

Almost like Bubbles, but I have an ESFJ mother that I live with. Very immature and disorganized. Tends to nag all the time when home and when she doesn't have anything to nag about, yet, she tells about her booring life and how people around her piss her off because they don't have common sence. They really are in-your-face 24/7 if you don't have your shit together. And they are never wrong. Probably the least introspective of all types I know. (I don't know any ESTJ's so I can't do any comparements).

(Yes I'm angry, had a fight with her recently)

 

[maliafee]

I love ESFJs and can tell you a myriad of good things. The ONLY thing that gets on my nerves is that the ones I know hold major grudges (also my ESFJ cousin will never let me share her snacks with her and says if I wanted some I should have asked when she was preparing the food 10 minutes ago...). HOWEVER, I mean, the trade off is so great -- the rest of them is terrific.

 

[Virtual ghost]

Well, it is well known fact that ESFJ girls don't go too well with INTism.

Personally I am not a fan.


However ESFJ chicks can be quite hot and flirty.
Usually they talk too much. The actual problem is not that they are doing that. The problem is that they don't say much with all those words.
It is not too hard to hurt their feelings. Quite easy to find.

 

[raz]

Well, it is well known fact that ESFJ girls don't go too well with INTism.

Personally I am not a fan.


However ESFJ chicks can be quite hot and flirty.
Usually they talk too much. The actual problem is not that they are doing that. The problem is that they don't say much with all those words.
It is not too hard to hurt their feelings. Quite easy to find.

My mother is ESFJ, father is INTJ. I just don't get what he sees in her. I'm not saying she's a bad person. It's just, they're on such different wavelengths. It must just be the opposites attract thing.

 

[proteanmix]

My mother is ESFJ, father is INTJ. I just don't get what he sees in her. I'm not saying she's a bad person. It's just, they're on such different wavelengths. It must just be the opposites attract thing.

Would you also wonder what she sees in him?

 

[pure_mercury]

None of these supposed attributes of ESFJs sound anything like me, except for the talking frequently and the deep concern for others (even if they don't want it). I am completely convinced that there is massive mistyping going on.

 

[King sns]

I'm going through a little phase with having esfj friends. I really appreciate their need to bring people together. They tend to be good event planners. They just want to have all their friends together and be happy. I noticed that whenever theres a fun event or trip going on, often its an ESFJ steering the wheel for planning. Its great.

I hate 'em when they are cranky.
They like to bang dishes while they are washing them and slam cabinet doors. (Well one in particular, atleast. ) Each of the others seem to have their own ways of making the world around them know that they are miserable and they are going to drag us all with them.

On a brighter note, the same applies to a good mood!

 

[raz]

Would you also wonder what she sees in him?

She said that my father really cared about her and it made her like him.

 

[pure_mercury]

I'm going through a little phase with having esfj friends. I really appreciate their need to bring people together. They tend to be good event planners. They just want to have all their friends together and be happy. I noticed that whenever theres a fun event or trip going on, often its an ESFJ steering the wheel for planning. Its great.

I hate 'em when they are cranky.
They like to bang dishes while they are washing them and slam cabinet doors. (Well one in particular, atleast. ) Each of the others seem to have their own ways of making the world around them know that they are miserable and they are going to drag us all with them.

On a brighter note, the same applies to a good mood!

See, I don't do that at all, and one of my biggest pet peeves is when people take out bad moods on everyone else. Drives me up the wall.

 

[King sns]

See, I don't do that at all, and one of my biggest pet peeves is when people take out bad moods on everyone else. Drives me up the wall.

I might add that I don't know any male esfj's.

 

[spirilis]

A fairly recent addition to my local group of friends is an ESFJ and he's actually a really chill dude. One time at a party somewhere along the lines he got talking about religion and church groups and somehow I ended up talking about sociology for 3 hours well into 2AM with him.
But I haven't found any ESFJ women in my group of friends yet. I've never really become close to any in the past but I've known some acquaintances, and somehow they had a way of making me timid of my own insecurities... guess I just wasn't used to or ready for their personality.

Actually now that I think about it, a friend's mom is an ESFJ and she's an interesting lady, full of stories and advice 'n stuff. Oh yeah and she takes care of you no matter what, leaving no opportunity to say "aw you didn't have to!!" or similar. Like an alpha-mom figure. LOL

 

[pure_mercury]

I might add that I don't know any male esfj's.

Hmmm, I wonder if that makes a difference. I know that, when I get angry, I don't flip out and make no sense whatsoever. I focus like a laser and excoriate people for the things they did wrong, and I don't let them get off-topic. I've been told that experiencing me when truly angry/disappointed is like being broken down on the witness stand by the world's scariest prosecutor.

 

[BlackCat]

It might be good to note mercury that I don't relate to anything people say about their bad experiences with INFPs, or much of anything people say about female INFPs. I can see where they are coming from and give advice but I can't say I do much of it. I think gender plays a huge role in what you're like as a type, and also people's actions are relative to the individual.

To add to the thread I think ESFJs are pretty cool. SJs in general I get along with well as friends. When ESFJs are mature they are great. A friend's mom is an ESFJ and I can talk to her about anything for hours on end. She's also very intelligent. I think that extroverts in general get milder as they age, and they get less annoying to introverted people.

 

[pure_mercury]

It might be good to note mercury that I don't relate to anything people say about their bad experiences with INFPs, or much of anything people say about female INFPs. I can see where they are coming from and give advice but I can't say I do much of it. I think gender plays a huge role in what you're like as a type, and also people's actions are relative to the individual.

To add to the thread I think ESFJs are pretty cool. SJs in general I get along with well as friends. When ESFJs are mature they are great. A friend's mom is an ESFJ and I can talk to her about anything for hours on end. She's also very intelligent. I think that extroverts in general get milder as they age, and they get less annoying to introverted people.

I think I've actually gotten more extroverted as I've grown up. Of course, I am a weirdo.