What are your greatest fears?

[RadicalDoubt]

That nothing I do will change anything regardless of how much effort I put into trying to make that change (ie. sort of like throwing a stone in the ocean)

 

[Tanker64B]

That I'll never achieve anything worth remembering.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

Sometimes I worry that I've become completely constructed of sadness.

 

[Mind Maverick]

Terrifying.

 

[Lark]

Maybe not being respected..

How do I deal with it? By being competent and accomplishing things.

I think I can understand this.

Although I have to say that I discovered the hard way that sometimes neither of those things count for much and are fast forgotten.

Objectively, almost everyone is replaceable, my organisation have behaved in the past (and still does in some of its directorates) not simply with this in mind but also does not value any of their employees, occasionally all pretense to anything other than this disappears and some truly nasty attitudes emerge and things are said.

So, so much here still depends on status and power struggles running there of, at best I would say the organization manages chaotic (accidential or one of) good but a lot of the time functions almost as chaotic evil or lawful evil. By which I'm talking about compliance with their own policies. Evil may be too strong a term, harmful may be better. The whole thing does result in precisely the sorts of problems and predatory behaviour in the community going unaddressed which the organization is meant to exist to address in the first place.

All the appraisals of this type of thing which I've read, attributing it to public ownership for instance, I think are reductionist and "hopeful". If that makes sense. As though a few easily understood remedies could correct this style of thing. I'm not sure what can remedy it but its more than a single change that's required at least. Some of the problems are with the profession and management per se, also factors which could only be described as wider social or cultural issues. Like a lot of the individuals or trends I see as ruinous within these services would only be benefited or accelerated by privatization or marketization.

To be honest a lot of my fears, I'm not sure if that's the right label for it, relate to these kinds of things. Which I am also aware could be a reflection of where I am in the demographic cycle of things too. Which is grand. Entropy, deterioration/degeneracy is a really awful thing to behold and there's so many criminal types just waiting in the wings to take advantage of it.

When it comes to actual fears its hella more basic, you dont want to be the victim of violence, murder, crime, harm, those sorts of things.

 

[Mind Maverick]

Thalassophobia. It's not the vastness that scares me...

...but rather, being in water you can't see everything in. By the time you see the predator it's too close for you to evade its attack.

I've seen lakes / ponds like this irl, and you look around and see gator eyes poking above water...fucking psychos, there's no way I'm going in there.

Have you ever walked through a haunted house just waiting for something to jump out at you? It's like that, except in this case that 'something' is real and it's actually going to eat you. You actually might die or be seriously injured; lose a limb or so, etc. That one moment of fun in the water can negatively impact your life forever if you do survive.

 

[Lark]

That I'll never achieve anything worth remembering.

I used to think about that, then I think my thinking on it changed and I didnt mind the idea that nothing may remain afterwards to be misinterpreted and misconstrued long after I had disappeared, I sometimes wonder what half of the thinkers I've read would imagine of people in totally different times interpreting their writing or views as though they were bang up to date

 

[highlander]

I think I can understand this. Although I have to say that I discovered the hard way that sometimes neither of those things count for much and are fast forgotten. Objectively, almost everyone is replaceable, my organisation have behaved in the past (and still does in some of its directorates) not simply with this in mind but also does not value any of their employees, occasionally all pretense to anything other than this disappears and some truly nasty attitudes emerge and things are said. So, so much here still depends on status and power struggles running there of, at best I would say the organization manages chaotic (accidential or one of) good but a lot of the time functions almost as chaotic evil or lawful evil. By which I'm talking about compliance with their own policies. Evil may be too strong a term, harmful may be better. The whole thing does result in precisely the sorts of problems and predatory behaviour in the community going unaddressed which the organization is meant to exist to address in the first place. All the appraisals of this type of thing which I've read, attributing it to public ownership for instance, I think are reductionist and "hopeful". If that makes sense. As though a few easily understood remedies could correct this style of thing. I'm not sure what can remedy it but its more than a single change that's required at least. Some of the problems are with the profession and management per se, also factors which could only be described as wider social or cultural issues. Like a lot of the individuals or trends I see as ruinous within these services would only be benefited or accelerated by privatization or marketization. To be honest a lot of my fears, I'm not sure if that's the right label for it, relate to these kinds of things. Which I am also aware could be a reflection of where I am in the demographic cycle of things too. Which is grand. Entropy, deterioration/degeneracy is a really awful thing to behold and there's so many criminal types just waiting in the wings to take advantage of it. When it comes to actual fears its hella more basic, you dont want to be the victim of violence, murder, crime, harm, those sorts of things.

Did you ever watch The Corporation?

 

[Abcdenfp]

Thalassophobia. It's not the vastness that scares me...

...but rather, being in water you can't see everything in. By the time you see the predator it's too close for you to evade its attack.

I've seen lakes / ponds like this irl, and you look around and see gator eyes poking above water...fucking psychos, there's no way I'm going in there.

Have you ever walked through a haunted house just waiting for something to jump out at you? It's like that, except in this case that 'something' is real and it's actually going to eat you. You actually might die or be seriously injured; lose a limb or so, etc. That one moment of fun in the water can negatively impact your life forever if you do survive.

I didn't know this was a thing but I have this too.. there is a blue hole on one of the islands here and in the center of the hole is a platform you swim out too.. you can also jump into it. ( ummm hell no and wake everything up!!) so I got brave Enough to get to the platform but then the fear of getting back in because I could see directly down into the abyss really had me freaking out.

 

[Lark]

Dud you ever watch The Corporation?

I think I watched at least part of that, its a vague recollection though so I probably need to at least give it a rewatch, netflix or amazon?

 

[Population: 1]

 

[The Cat]

Are you my mummy?

 

[Mind Maverick]

Trump actually winning the 2020 election...

...but sadly, Milgram also already proved that there's a possibility.
"What people cannot be counted on is to realize that a seemingly benevolent authority is in fact malevolent, even when they are faced with overwhelming evidence which suggests that this authority is indeed malevolent. Hence, the underlying cause for the subjects' striking conduct could well be conceptual, and not the alleged 'capacity of man to abandon his humanity ... as he merges his unique personality into larger institutional structures."'

My greatest fear is that normal, regular people you meet every day are the same in character as Nazis and other war criminals, but only await opportunity and permission. Sometimes they are.

The above is relevant to this.

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

QAnon is a significant fear for me. My ex was a follower of that, so I've been aware of it since its beginning. I'm afraid of how many of my neighbors are involved with that now. I'm afraid of how it is becoming mainstream. I'm afraid that the followers have a lot of it backwards like who exactly is involved in sex trafficking.

I don't actually trust any politician or leader, but I feel a new level of nausea and anxiety.

I also know about the group dynamics of shared paranoia and was raised with it. This is on a mass scale.

 

[The Cat]

QAnon is a significant fear for me. My ex was a follower of that, so I've been aware of it since its beginning. I'm afraid of how many of my neighbors are involved with that now. I'm afraid of how it is becoming mainstream. I'm afraid that the followers have a lot of it backwards like who exactly is involved in sex trafficking.

I don't actually trust any politician or leader, but I feel a new level of nausea and anxiety.

I also know about the group dynamics of shared paranoia and was raised with it. This is on a mass scale.

This is how things got out of hand in the Dark Ages.

 

[Schrödinger's Name]

Within two months it'll be two years ago that I met my former girlfriend for the first time. No, this isn't an emo-heartbreak post; I use certain life events to measure/keep track of time. The fact that it's almost two freakin years ago makes me feel so uncomfortable.

Thank you Tumblr, exactly this:

(Also yes, I have been like this since the ago of +-13. Always using certain 'events' as some sort of 'checkpoint'- to measure how much time has passed. For someone who thinks/thought about dying a bit too much I do have a strange reluctance to how fast I seem to be running out of time. I love myself a nice contradiction from time to time.)

 

[Peter Deadpan]

Within two months it'll be two years ago that I met my former girlfriend for the first time. No, this isn't an emo-heartbreak post; I use certain life events to measure/keep track of time. The fact that it's almost two freakin years ago makes me feel so uncomfortable.

Thank you Tumblr, exactly this:

(Also yes, I have been like this since the ago of +-13. Always using certain 'events' as some sort of 'checkpoint'- to measure how much time has passed. For someone who thinks/thought about dying a bit too much I do have a strange reluctance to how fast I seem to be running out of time. I love myself a nice contradiction from time to time.)

I also measure time from events. I don't really possess the ability to track time with numbers/dates.

The passing of time gets scary (for me at least) when you see it reflected on your person and know it's all downhill from there (unless you are going to commit to some extreme body transformation, which I personally think about all the time but never start). Death is something I've imagined many times, but I don't actually meditate on dying, and so I haven't truly begun to face my mortality. That in itself is quietly frightening because I know I'm avoiding or blind to it somehow.

*adds 'meditate on death' to list of things I'll never start*

 

[Mind Maverick]

Invincibility, immortality...if those existed. You couldn't pay me a million dollars to be either one.

 

[Schrödinger's Name]

I also measure time from events. I don't really possess the ability to track time with numbers/dates.

The passing of time gets scary (for me at least) when you see it reflected on your person and know it's all downhill from there (unless you are going to commit to some extreme body transformation, which I personally think about all the time but never start). Death is something I've imagined many times, but I don't actually meditate on dying, and so I haven't truly begun to face my mortality. That in itself is quietly frightening because I know I'm avoiding or blind to it somehow.

*adds 'meditate on death' to list of things I'll never start*

How many people ever face their mortality? Except for the ones who fear death or have lost important people because of it? It seems like people are very busy doing their own thing- not thinking about the possibility that they or their loved ones could die anytime soon (though 'Miss Rona' may have changed that). I mean yeah, technically I know I can (and will) die but it's still just so ????????? Meditate on death... interesting concept.

In my case I wouldn't say it went downhill per se. But things are/feel 'different' (dûh). Another way I keep 'track of time' is by my playlists, which is sometimes annoying- but it can be 'fun' too.

 

[The Cat]

How many people ever face their mortality? Except for the ones who fear death or have lost important people because of it? It seems like people are very busy doing their own thing- not thinking about the possibility that they or their loved ones could die anytime soon (though 'Miss Rona' may have changed that). I mean yeah, technically I know I can (and will) die but it's still just so ????????? Meditate on death... interesting concept.

In my case I wouldn't say it went downhill per se. But things are/feel 'different' (dûh). Another way I keep 'track of time' is by my playlists, which is sometimes annoying- but it can be 'fun' too.

You can also find yourself surviving things that have killed other people.