[ISTJ] Understanding Male ISTJ Minds

[PinkIceTD]

You shall never understand our minds. NEVER NEVER NEVER.

apparently not. the more you simplify, the more complicated you seem.

 

[moonbaby]

By the way, I thought I would report that when I sent my ISTJs words back to him, he has not responded. He has actually become very distant and not around much at all....seemingly avoiding me. lol, sheesh. Complicated creature. I suppose he is trying to figure out the meaning of my actions.

 

[moonbaby]

Oh, he is sooooo completely avoiding me now. Wow, a 180! Can anyone give me an idea what may have him acting so opposite? Is he embarrassed? Or mad at me/himself?

 

[ArbiterDewey]

Oh, he is sooooo completely avoiding me now. Wow, a 180! Can anyone give me an idea what may have him acting so opposite? Is he embarrassed? Or mad at me/himself?

I don't really know at this point. I'd say he doesn't know what he thinks/wants. Avoidance due to marital obligation, yet personally desiring to get closer to you; however, unable to act on that impulse because of the former.

Dunno...

 

[Wild horses]

I make no secret of the fact that I love you ISTJs. You style of communicating absolutely fascinates me. I think probably I annoy the ISTJs in my life mainly because I am such a flake and they don't seem to tolerate that very well but I do find that our relationships are characterised by mutual respect and affection. as a result we all put our differnces aside at the end of the day because of our affection for eachother, very little gets resolved but it tends to add some spice to our relatinships

 

[moonbaby]

I don't really know at this point. I'd say he doesn't know what he thinks/wants. Avoidance due to marital obligation, yet personally desiring to get closer to you; however, unable to act on that impulse because of the former.

Dunno...

Somehow I tracked right with you on that...silly boy.
Thank you for your thoughts on this. I kept thinking 'could he have completely vanished all feeling'...though the other side of me was thinking just what you stated.


*i will add he has been very crabby with someone who has of late been harmlessly flirting w/me. He keeps questioning his intelligence/thoughts on subjects. It began as the flirting began (which I do not flirt back btw, I am very purposeful in such behavior)

 

[Cimarron]

*i will add he has been very crabby with someone who has of late been harmlessly flirting w/me. He keeps questioning his intelligence/thoughts on subjects. It began as the flirting began (which I do not flirt back btw, I am very purposeful in such behavior)

Question here: How subtle was he (the ISTJ)? Because you sound pretty observant in this... I'm trying to gauge how obvious I've been while doing this in the past with other girls. Maybe you're just really observant.

 

[moonbaby]

Question here: How subtle was he (the ISTJ)? Because you sound pretty observant in this... I'm trying to gauge how obvious I've been while doing this in the past with other girls. Maybe you're just really observant.

1. You say while you have been doing THIS in the past. Please tell me, just what is THIS. Who/what purpose does this represent serve??? I am so curious to know.

Is it to: a. Punish flirter and /or b. Proves something to me

2. His is very obvious, to me anyhow. He is calling him out in writing. Editing and correcting flirters thoughts, ideas and comments.

THOUGH, I am very in tune with and very connected to him.
I am sure he reads me like a book too- to some degree.

 

[Cimarron]

1. You say while you have been doing THIS in the past. Please tell me, just what is THIS. Who/what purpose does this represent/serve??? I am so curious to know.

Is it to: a. Punish flirter and /or b. Proves something to me

2. His is very obvious, to me anyhow. He is calling him out in writing. Editing and correcting flirters thoughts, ideas and comments.

THOUGH, I am very in tune with and very connected to him.
I am sure he reads me like a book too- to some degree.

True, that's expected when you know each other well.

When I've done this, it's to "prove" that the other guy is less worthy of you than he seems to be. And disguising it as a logical jab instead of an emotional jab lets me feel like I've hidden my emotions, so that it hopefully appears "subtle". Don't want to be too obvious with my emotions.

It's kind of me being protective of the girl. A very SJ "I don't think that guy is good for you" attitude, or "you deserve better than him".

I feel like I'm going out on a limb again, though. If my post looks wacky to another ISTJ, just let us know!

 

[moonbaby]

I dont think you are going out on a limb at all...It is pretty much what I thought based on his current and past behavior. thank you!

I could be wrong, I think he is repressing a lot right now. I keep expecting a blow in general. He is keeping his cool right now, just the jabs.

 

[ArbiterDewey]

I feel like I'm going out on a limb again, though. If my post looks wacky to another ISTJ, just let us know!

You know, I wonder if we're the only type, that, as a group, second-guess our own way of doing things as often as we do type-wise. Excuse that sentence.

So far, I agree with you completely.

 

[moonbaby]

Thanks guys..........you are so much help. As much as I think I know what may or may not be transpiring, you give me a far better idea of what seems to be transpiring.

It makes for an uncomfortable situation...so, at least kind of knowing what may be going on gives some comfort. **sigh**

 

[PinkIceTD]

I like agree with moonbaby about the insight you all provide.

I also like Cimarron's Doug avatar.

 

[BlueScreen]

You know, I wonder if we're the only type, that, as a group, second-guess our own way of doing things as often as we do type-wise. Excuse that sentence.

So far, I agree with you completely.

I think liking predictability might have something to do with it .

 

[Cimarron]

I think liking predictability might have something to do with it .

You mean the "look before you leap" thing? I've got that for sure (and it's very relevant to the thread topic).

 

[moonbaby]

Look before you leap, yes I understand that....I do that myself.

Though, there is an aspect I see in ISTJ's vs myself and other INTJ's.

If it is in front of you, status quo and a sure thing, you may choose that as more realistic and accept it rather than to put all your energy and hope and time into something that may be far better but not promised.

Does that make sense??? I am very tired tonight. Sorry. **yawn** zzzzzz

 

[Cimarron]

Look before you leap, yes I understand that....I do that myself.

Though, there is an aspect I see in ISTJ's vs myself and other INTJ's.

If it is in front of you, status quo and a sure thing, you may choose that as more realistic and accept it rather than to put all your energy and hope and time into something that may be far better but not promised.

Does that make sense??? I am very tired tonight. Sorry. **yawn** zzzzzz

The blue one doesn't look reliable enough, if I decide not to go for it. I like trying to consider all possibilities and taking everything into account, but sometimes when it's unreliable like that...

 

[moonbaby]

I don't know. *sigh*
After ignoring/avoiding me after copying his words back to him, he completely disappeared for 10 days....to only show up today, swoop in and defend my work in writing against another male who basically made it sound as if I were a silly girl...and was gone before I saw him.

Guys, is this a game?

 

[Cimarron]

How would it be a game? At the very least, it means he respects you.

 

[Cimarron]

All right, since so many have spilled their guts, I'll share something of my own. Also I'm very bored tonight.

I may have a small crush on a girl in my class. Maybe, I'm not sure. I don't spend time agonizing over it or anything. Strangely for her, she's the only girl in our very small class.

We were all working on group projects one day, and I ended up in a group with her. The teacher came around to check on our tasks, and that girl asked the teacher about where to get certain supplies. He said, "Did you try asking your partners? Cimarron, do you have that thing?" And I said yes, because I did. The teacher likes to joke around with (almost playfully pick on) us students; he's a student-teacher himself, so he pointed it out to her, "You see? Cimarron had it all along! Your partner is standing around waiting for you, wondering when you're going to ask him..." She started laughing, since he was just joking around with her, and I tried to laugh about it too and just brush it off: "Oh come on!" This was what I had in mind earlier in this thread or other threads when I mentioned "trying to distance myself from the idea of me liking her, hoping nobody notices it" but also "keeping in mind what she might think of me, and not sounding too harsh in my cover-up" since that would completely defeat the purpose. I know, it even sounds too complicated to me. Chalk the whole process up to shyness.

To kind of even everything out, when we were the last two people in class the next day, as she left I said goodbye, which I'd never bothered doing before. The next time, we were the last two out again, and as I was leaving she said goodbye to me! Cool. So I'm not getting my hopes up, but it's something I think about, a little bit.