Multiple Enneagram Subtypes/Instincts The seduction styles of various enneagram variant combos

[Psyclepath]

I suspect I am an sp/sx.

The description on the first page sort of fits, except I'm terrible at seducing. I did once manage to deeply seduce a girl by singing. I keep on expressing my energy in the most genuine way I can; for many, they recognize my intensity but do not understand it, and are afraid of me because they cannot comprehend me. I figure that if I keep expressing myself, I will create bonds. I need someone who understands me; a superficial connection means nothing to me.

 

[Neokortex]

I am so/sx and I don't really have a seduction style. Poor men must do all the work

Ah, darn, why do we always have to do the work...? And you call yourselves feminists?

 

[Virtual ghost]

So/sp

I've noticed that the so/sp style of seduction almost looks 3w2. The so/sp will try to seduce an individual by convincing them that they are uber successful. They will show off their clout, money, social prestige, and whatnot, and will seduce the individual by impressing them. The also often use the group to meet new people.

I think this is actually true for the most part. I often feel as if I don't have the ammo to do it any other way, what isn't completely unfounded.

 

[Lady Lazarus]

Sp/sx and sx/sp

The sexual/self-preservation and self-preservation/sexual types tend to have a very one on one style of seduction. Many times they don't like to seduce people through social groups. However sometimes in a social group they will pull aside a person away from everyone else and have a one on one interaction with an individual. It should be well noted that the sx/sp and sp/sx styles of seductions almost always work best one on one. They will quickly create an intense bond between just them and the other individual. The sx/sp and sp/sx style of seduction tends to be very subtle as well and doesn't really come off as in your face.

This is the only one that fits. Especially when I was younger. By now I'm much too marked up to manage not to purely self-inhibit.

 

[cascadeco]

I zero in on people I'm drawn to. That's what people do when they like someone, no? That's what 'seduction' is? Even non romantically, we're drawn to people we have an affinity for and away from people we don't? And the act of being interested in someone and honing in on that person requires 1:1 time, right? The OP's distinctions don't make much sense to me. (and the so/sp description doesn't apply at all for me)

 

[1487610420]

 

[Cloudpatrol]

I zero in on people I'm drawn to. That's what people do when they like someone, no? That's what 'seduction' is? Even non romantically, we're drawn to people we have an affinity for and away from people we don't? And the act of being interested in someone and honing in on that person requires 1:1 time, right? The OP's distinctions don't make much sense to me. (and the so/sp description doesn't apply at all for me)

The definition of seduction can be a few different things: to entice into sexual activity, to attract powerfully or to lead astray. I think the OP was referring to the first two, as you said: romantically or not.

I think the 1:1 time can mean different things to different people and maybe that is where the styles come in? ie. I can't be drawn to someone physically without also being drawn to their brain. So, for me 1:1 time involves more intimate conversing, on deep topics. Or having fun doing things, the 'two of us'. Someone I am close to doesn't relate to that at all. They are drawn more to people based on outer appearances/expressions and for them 1:1 time means: doing physical activities together even with other people involved.

So, one person's idea of seduction might be: a fun activity in a group where they can experience adrenaline and observe the other person. While another's might be: to be able to be alone with the person and find out everything they have done and what their dreams are or what they value etc. Another's idea of seduction might be to combine the two...

I think the idea in the OP is trying to generalize those and, like all generalizations, there is much room for where everyone specifically fits

 

[1487610420]

1:1 aka 1:2-3

 

[Obfuscate]

i more or less talk to people one on one because that is the most enjoyable... from there if a move is made, it is by the other party... i am not the sort that really actively pursues anyone... it does seem that the sort of people i like pick up on my interest well, so my passiveness in the beginning of things pays off well... i have never been the one to initiate a relationship... i guess i do things to make expressing interest easy or difficult based on how i feel about the other person... avoiding that initial expression of interest can be a challenge...

 

[Amargith]

Tbh, Ive been stalked by sx-sps and they can be..very tiger-like themselves. They also do the whole push and pull, ime - they'll draw you in, almost violently so, to then turn aloof...rinse and repeat. Meanwhile sp/sx seems to keep their distance, appearing uninterested, then suddenly jumps you and 'acquires' you in a very matter of fact way.


I have had another sx-so go after me...now that was a fucking wild ride

These days though, I see them coming coz I recognize the tools of the trade

 

[cascadeco]

The definition of seduction can be a few different things: to entice into sexual activity, to attract powerfully or to lead astray. I think the OP was referring to the first two, as you said: romantically or not.

I think the 1:1 time can mean different things to different people and maybe that is where the styles come in? ie. I can't be drawn to someone physically without also being drawn to their brain. So, for me 1:1 time involves more intimate conversing, on deep topics. Or having fun doing things, the 'two of us'. Someone I am close to doesn't relate to that at all. They are drawn more to people based on outer appearances/expressions and for them 1:1 time means: doing physical activities together even with other people involved.

So, one person's idea of seduction might be: a fun activity in a group where they can experience adrenaline and observe the other person. While another's might be: to be able to be alone with the person and find out everything they have done and what their dreams are or what they value etc. Another's idea of seduction might be to combine the two...

I think the idea in the OP is trying to generalize those and, like all generalizations, there is much room for where everyone specifically fits

Yeah, I guess I am just being nitpicky re the OP because the first thing I was thinking when looking at his descriptions was... uh... everyone meets people when they're out in a 'group' -- (ie you don't meet someone in a vacuum) -- whether that group be a school class, a web forum, a group of people who all chose to go to a bar on a saturday night (thus everyone has that in common), a club or organization (prob what many people think of when they think of an official 'group'), a group of friends/ friend of friends... etc.

And I did take 1:1 literally -- for me, 1:1 would be 1:1 time just me and the other person. I'm totally not opposed to doing things as part of a small group / group activities can be really fun, but I wouldn't ever call a group activity '1:1 time'. Without getting into detail on it, it's not like I'm actually going to get to know someone really well or 'seduce' them (lol) unless we break apart from the group / we do our own thing.

So... I kinda get the OP, but at the same time, I wasn't really sure how accurate it really was, which is why I posted what I did (esp since both myself and another so/sp early on in the thread didn't relate to the so/sp description at all).

 

[Cloudpatrol]

[MENTION=1206]cascadeco[/MENTION]

I didn’t think you were being nitpicky or didn’t comprehend the OP

I actually agreed with your sentiments! I would imagine the many facets of seductions and preferences people have would be difficult to describe simply…

I used to be obsessed with the topic of seduction after watching some TED talks on it. I would frequently grill friends on what it meant to them. I quickly realized that, most everyone had completely varying views on what seduction consisted of:

-liking to observe someone before getting to know them better
-getting the person alone, to find out everything about them
-being properly seduced with a good meal of a food they liked
-sensual whispering.
-clothes that were tight and revealing
-outfits that were flattering but left much to the imagination
-maintaining direct eye contact; without physical touch initially
-direct and lingering touches

and so on and so on.

Our subsets do play a role. As do: how our first experiences shape us, the values of the environment we grew up in, what things we are exposed to, how other’s react to us…

All those aspects involve different levels of social interaction and a large degree of personal preference. Challenging to “categorize”!

 

[ceecee]

So. Apparently the sp/sx are more likely to study at distance before they more actively decide to pursue, do to self preservation being foremost. . . hadn't crossed my mind earlier but aha. That's why other females I was interested in in the past ended up figuring many times that I wasn't interested in them when I was. I can't just jump in and pounce like some people can. Too cautious. Too risky. Need to test the waters, of which generally ends up a great test of their patience. I study. study. Then claim. If the opportunity hasn't predictably slipped away that is...

And yes... One on one is my only way of anything like 'seduction'. I'm extremely private when it comes to showing much affection. Which also has bothered some.

I agree as I'm also sp/sx but I'm not so afraid of those risks so much. I chalk this up to the 8. But I do study closely because I want to body language to tell me the story. I don't care for indecision so yes, I can see others having problems with that. It would be tremendously helpful for you to verbalize what you're doing to some degree. Then women wouldn't feel like you are dicking around and fucking with them.

 

[Epic Love]

I would agree with the sx/sp and sp/sx style.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

I typically hone in on one man and seduce him through wit, flirting, and often carefully placed overt notes of sexuality. When I was younger, I would use some playful teasing too (as in making fun of him in a harmless way). It's always been me who has said to men "so, when are you gonna ask me out/ask me to be your girlfriend?" All of a sudden, I find myself much more hesitant to use these methods to "catch" a mate, mostly because I don't wanna settle down with the wrong guy, so instead there is a longer screening process now. It's kind of strange for me because I am used to being extremely confident and in control of the situation - I still am, but it's... a bit different. Doesn't help at all that I am drawn to two men simultaneously atm. It's probably going to boil down to who pursues me harder or wins me over with something special character wise. Guess I'll have to wait and see. Fuck, maybe I'll walk away from both...

 

[kotoshinohaisha]

I'm sx/so xD

Geez. But I'm trying to limit myself now. Before it's easy for me to ask the guy i like. XD which in return also likes me. [emoji14]

But I'm limiting myself now. Because i don't wanna have heartaches again. Hahahahahaha

 

[Ender_lance]

Sx/So and yeah, pretty accurate, infiltrate, befriend 'target', slide in what seem to be Freudian slips to convey the message, tell shitty jokes that target that person to the whole group, generally, yeah, your description is accurate, then when there's a 3rd opportunity make a move, first chance could be mistake, second could be too soon, but third means they put themselves in a situation for someone to make a move multiple times, so i go for it then, had never thought about it as predator/prey hunting style lol.

 

[Psyclepath]

I'm awful at communicating. Makes me anxious as hell. Usually I just end up studying anyone I'm obsessed with, to learn as much about them as possible. I feel like the moment I give my intentions away, I'm creating a connection the other person was in no way prepared for and will immediately lose it.

 

[Agent Washington]

I think I'm too clueless to pull any of these off.

 

[~Alissia~]

I am so/sx and I don't really have a seduction style. Poor men must do all the work

haha, me too