Multiple Enneagram Subtypes/Instincts The seduction styles of various enneagram variant combos

[The Great One]

I have been investigating the seduction styles of various individuals with various enneagram variant combinations. Here is what I've noticed about how each enneagram stack seduces people....

Sp/sx and sx/sp​

The sexual/self-preservation and self-preservation/sexual types tend to have a very one on one style of seduction. Many times they don't like to seduce people through social groups. However sometimes in a social group they will pull aside a person away from everyone else and have a one on one interaction with an individual. It should be well noted that the sx/sp and sp/sx styles of seductions almost always work best one on one. They will quickly create an intense bond between just them and the other individual. The sx/sp and sp/sx style of seduction tends to be very subtle as well and doesn't really come off as in your face.

Sx/so​

The sexual/social style of seduction is almost like a tiger hunting for prey. The sexual/social style of seduction is very direct and in your face. There is no confusion as to what the sx/so is after. The sx/so style of seduction can either come off as extremely sexy or down-right creepy. With this style of seduction the individual in question goes to a social group and basically steals people out of that social group and makes their own group. Also, they can infiltrate the social group and work through the group to seduce the individual.

So/sx​

The social/sexual style of seduction also works through the group. However, many times they will want to seduce individuals through the usage of groups. Many times they will try to be liked by the group and win the admiration of the group, and then win the individual that they want to seduce that way. Also, they often enjoy a fairly small group to hang out with as well.

So/sp​

I've noticed that the so/sp style of seduction almost looks 3w2. The so/sp will try to seduce an individual by convincing them that they are uber successful. They will show off their clout, money, social prestige, and whatnot, and will seduce the individual by impressing them. The also often use the group to meet new people.

I'm not sure about how sp/so seduces people.

This is what I have observed about various enneagram variant seduction styles. My so/sx and so/sp descriptions probably suck though so I probably need to revise them. However, what do you all thing about my observations?

 

[Rasofy]

That's pretty good!

Sp/sx works for me, and so/sp seems to work pretty well for my brother. He seems to want to borrow all my items that could communicate high status.

I used to have a fancy Bulova watch that could draw a lot of attention, but all the attention directed to what I have rather than to what I am got boring quickly. Not for him though.

 

[Thalassa]

Yes, sx/so seduction style is either intense and almost creepy, or it resembles war, it may make other people uncomfortable, not unlike a 48 hour scorpion mating dance.

NO U!

There's actually nothing quite like two sx/so together...but they can develop love/hate or unstable or abusive relationships with one another, I think, if they're immature or not careful.

JUST FOR THE LULZ.

 

[skylights]

Sx/so​

[...] With this style of seduction the individual in question goes to a social group and basically steals people out of that social group and makes their own group. Also, they can infiltrate the social group and work through the group to seduce the individual.

Even with making friends in school... I remember zeroing in on the people I felt super-drawn to... then infiltrating the group... using it as an excuse to get closer to them... using it as a vector, a vehicle... then once I was completely enmeshed in the group to the point that I was part of the group 100% of the time, so I could see that person 100% of the time they were present in the group, then I'd begin to draw that person away from the group into our new coupling... actually speaking of, I'm sort of doing that with someone right now. I mean... isn't this how everyone goes about making friends?



I didn't realize I was that creepy.

 

[Rasofy]

Even with making friends in school... I remember zeroing in on the people I felt super-drawn to... then infiltrating the group... using it as an excuse to get closer to them... using it as a vector, a vehicle... then once I was completely enmeshed in the group to the point that I was part of the group 100% of the time, so I could see that person 100% of the time they were present in the group, then I'd begin to draw that person away from the group into our new coupling... actually speaking of, I'm sort of doing that with someone right now. I mean... isn't this how everyone goes about making friends?

I usually make friends somewhat accidentally, but it doesn't have to be this way.

I didn't realize I was that creepy.

Aw, c'mon. I'm willing to bet that your approach would be ranked on the 'extremely sexy' end of the spectrum.

 

[skylights]

I usually make friends somewhat accidentally, but it doesn't have to be this way.


Aw, c'mon. I'm willing to bet that your approach would be ranked on the 'extremely sexy' end of the spectrum.

What's funny is that it's only really been an sp/sx who's pursued me, that ever ended successfully. Otherwise I was mostly the pursuer, or not interested.

 

[Siúil a Rúin]

Have to say this is one of the few stereotypes that I would say actually fits me. The sx/sp one-on-one subtle style is all I can relate to doing.

 

[HongDou]

Hmm, I relate both the sp/sx and sx/sp style and the sx/so style. sp/sx and sx/sp in the sense that I need my one on one time with him to connect and I find that the most meaningful part of getting to know someone. sx/so in the sense that I'll sometimes start my own group with various people and the person of interest so we have some common ground. Next time I'm interested in someone I'll have to take note of how I try to seduce them. I do notice that I remain intensely focused on that one individual when I am in a group and unconsciously end up smiling and laughing at them a lot. I think it's a habit that I picked up a while ago when I came across this quote:

"Every time she laughs, she hopes he's watching. Not so that he sees she's happy. But maybe, just maybe, he'll fall for her smile - just as hard as she fell for his."

Edit: I just remembered a few years ago I did insert myself in the friend group of this guy I was hardcore crushing on.

 

[pinkgraffiti]

that's really good but... can't you separate sx/sp from sp/sx?

 

[Amargith]

Well...you're not supposed to 'tell' people about the tiger-prey stalking

I usually end up getting pursued myself, ime, despite being sx-so. What most don't know is...uhm, they've been selected beforehand (though I'm open to surprises, as it sometimes yields the most amazing gold nuggets).

When I do actively pursue, it is usually done to push someone's buttons or for show/play. I always back off after the show is done. If they pursue me after that...we'll see what happens

As for the group dynamic...there is nothing quite like feeling someone follow your every move while you go about your business in the group you both feel comfortable in and returning the favour.

I guess what I'm saying is...I identify with the sx-so description, but there is more to it than that

 

[Southern Kross]

Sorry, but the So/Sp is way off for me.

 

[brainheart]

Sorry, but the So/Sp is way off for me.

Fours screw up everything.

I would say I am primarily like this:

Sp/sx and sx/sp

The sexual/self-preservation and self-preservation/sexual types tend to have a very one on one style of seduction. Many times they don't like to seduce people through social groups. However sometimes in a social group they will pull aside a person away from everyone else and have a one on one interaction with an individual. It should be well noted that the sx/sp and sp/sx styles of seductions almost always work best one on one. They will quickly create an intense bond between just them and the other individual. The sx/sp and sp/sx style of seduction tends to be very subtle as well and doesn't really come off as in your face.

But sometimes I'm like this, although it's once every ten years sort of rare, and I'm either manic, drunk, or both, and the sp/sx style didn't work and I'm really desperate:

Sx/so

The sexual/social style of seduction is almost like a tiger hunting for prey. The sexual/social style of seduction is very direct and in your face. There is no confusion as to what the sx/so is after.

 

[mintleaf]

Sx/so​

The sexual/social style of seduction is almost like a tiger hunting for prey. The sexual/social style of seduction is very direct and in your face. There is no confusion as to what the sx/so is after. The sx/so style of seduction can either come off as extremely sexy or down-right creepy. With this style of seduction the individual in question goes to a social group and basically steals people out of that social group and makes their own group. Also, they can infiltrate the social group and work through the group to seduce the individual.

...

This is what I have observed about various enneagram variant seduction styles. My so/sx and so/sp descriptions probably suck though so I probably need to revise them. However, what do you all thing about my observations?

The bolded is very accurate for me. Maybe creepy, but at least I'm subtle about it.

If you want to revise it, this thread might be helpful.

 

[The Great One]

That's pretty good!

Sp/sx works for me, and so/sp seems to work pretty well for my brother. He seems to want to borrow all my items that could communicate high status.

I used to have a fancy Bulova watch that could draw a lot of attention, but all the attention directed to what I have rather than to what I am got boring quickly. Not for him though.

I'm glad that you like this.

Yes, sx/so seduction style is either intense and almost creepy, or it resembles war, it may make other people uncomfortable, not unlike a 48 hour scorpion mating dance.

NO U!

There's actually nothing quite like two sx/so together...but they can develop love/hate or unstable or abusive relationships with one another, I think, if they're immature or not careful.

JUST FOR THE LULZ.

I've noticed that sx/so couples tend to be manic and eros.

Even with making friends in school... I remember zeroing in on the people I felt super-drawn to... then infiltrating the group... using it as an excuse to get closer to them... using it as a vector, a vehicle... then once I was completely enmeshed in the group to the point that I was part of the group 100% of the time, so I could see that person 100% of the time they were present in the group, then I'd begin to draw that person away from the group into our new coupling... actually speaking of, I'm sort of doing that with someone right now. I mean... isn't this how everyone goes about making friends?



I didn't realize I was that creepy.

This isn't what I do. I generally do best working in a large group setting though. However, what I do is that meet a person through a large group and chat with them in the group. Then, I will single that person out and want to be completely alone with them after that, and completely exclude the group. My friends hate me for this and tell me that I am "putting hos before bros", but I could give less of a shit.

Hmm, I relate both the sp/sx and sx/sp style and the sx/so style. sp/sx and sx/sp in the sense that I need my one on one time with him to connect and I find that the most meaningful part of getting to know someone. sx/so in the sense that I'll sometimes start my own group with various people and the person of interest so we have some common ground. Next time I'm interested in someone I'll have to take note of how I try to seduce them. I do notice that I remain intensely focused on that one individual when I am in a group and unconsciously end up smiling and laughing at them a lot. I think it's a habit that I picked up a while ago when I came across this quote:

"Every time she laughs, she hopes he's watching. Not so that he sees she's happy. But maybe, just maybe, he'll fall for her smile - just as hard as she fell for his."

Edit: I just remembered a few years ago I did insert myself in the friend group of this guy I was hardcore crushing on.

Personally, I believe that sx/so can do either. Sx/so can either seduce through the group or one on one.

that's really good but... can't you separate sx/sp from sp/sx?

They just seem so similar to me. However, it has been said by the enneagram institute that often times Sp/sx types will use Sx to meet self-pres needs, and sx/sp will use sp to meet sx needs. In other words, they use their second variant to satisfy their first variant. A perfect example of this can be seen in the movie, "Gone with the Wind". In the movie we have Scarlett O'Hara (Sp/sx) who basically marries Rhett Butler for his money: she uses her looks and sex appeal to meet her self-preservation needs. Then, we have Rhett Butler (sx/sp) who basically is a sugar daddy to Scarlett and just gives her money whenever she wants. So therefore, he used sp to meet his primary sx needs. Keep in mind this is all coming from the enneagram institute: I didn't make this stuff up.

 

[mcgooglian]

I'm sp/sx and I don't seduce though I do tend to prefer one on one time with people, and since I generally talk to girls more, it's lead to complications. Sometimes they become interested and for some reason they think I'm also interested in them half the time.

 

[pinkgraffiti]

They just seem so similar to me. However, it has been said by the enneagram institute that often times Sp/sx types will use Sx to meet self-pres needs, and sx/sp will use sp to meet sx needs. In other words, they use their second variant to satisfy their first variant.

mm, i may be wrong, but i had a distinct feeling that an sx-dom would revert to so. it was something about the natural flow of the variants (there is even a diagram for that)... and indeed sp-dom would go sx. I can't find it, can you?

 

[skylights]

^ Yeah, sp → sx → so → sp. I don't remember the source for it either, though I do remember reading it.

Like sx moves into the outer world, sp attempts getting super close, and so cleans themselves up.

It's interesting, though, because you'd figure there would be some differences between sx/so and sx/sp in how they go about courting. Maybe the instincts tend to "double up" and sx/so moves into so/sp while sx/sp moves into sp/sx.

At the same time, I also kind of feel like we all tend to broaden scope, attempt intimacy, and do a better job of self-presentation when we're trying to bag someone.

 

[Cimarron]

I'm not sure about how sp/so seduces people.

Neither are we. Thus begins to unfold the complexity of the problem.

 

[21%]

Even with making friends in school... I remember zeroing in on the people I felt super-drawn to... then infiltrating the group... using it as an excuse to get closer to them... using it as a vector, a vehicle... then once I was completely enmeshed in the group to the point that I was part of the group 100% of the time, so I could see that person 100% of the time they were present in the group, then I'd begin to draw that person away from the group into our new coupling... actually speaking of, I'm sort of doing that with someone right now. I mean... isn't this how everyone goes about making friends?

I thought this was INFJ-specific. Seems I was wrong!

 

[mmhmm]

i always have a favourite.
and then i pull them out of line.