Fluffy Ts and Cold Fs

[miss fortune]

Why do people seem to think that Ts are supposed to be all serious and such all of the time? And that Fs should be nice to everyone all of the time?

Thinkers who appear fluffy and bubbly around here get accused of being Feelers all of the time! And I can think of at least one sarcastic F who has been called a Thinker. Why?!? Can't a Thinker act cheery without someone suspecting that they aren't a thinker after all? or vice versa? :steam:

Please- somebody explain this to me- it's seriously annoying!

 

[The Ü™]

Can't a Thinker act cheery without someone suspecting that they aren't a thinker after all? or vice versa? :steam:

Never, it's against the law. Thinkers who are warm and cheery are traitors to their people!

Oh, and besides, you have Fe as your tertiary! This could theoretically make the ExTP more fluffy and friendly and the ExFP (whose tertiary is Te) more sadistic and controlling!

 

[Athenian200]

Stereotyping, primarily. It's related to the tendencies of extreme types.

Thinking types are usually logical in their behavior (especially dominant T's), and often behaving nicely or personally doesn't seem logical to them, so they don't feel as much incentive to do so. If they've developed their F, they may well do such things. Unbalanced T's are very cold, critical, and disagreeable, and unbalanced F's are very ditsy, anthropomorphizing, and subjective in their behavior.

It's also more likely that T's will be more comfortable behaving impersonally, and that F's will be more comfortable behaving personally. People tend change the tendency into an absolute in their mind due to processing limitations (I've done this myself, so I know).

 

[SillySapienne]

I'm an F who likes to think she's a cunt.

Also, all people have emotions, and all (some) people think.

 

[scantilyclad]

it is annoying! i remember one instance where a member told me that i seemed like more of an ISTP. i was like

it also bothers me a little when people post stuff like "my friend says he is an INTP, BUT HE IS TOTALLY NOT"

no one knows you better than you know yourself! it's rude to question someone's type IMO.

 

[substitute]

I dunno... I don't think of it as a T/F thing... I tend to associate 'maximum bubbliness' with EP-ness, to varying degrees.

 

[The Ü™]

it is annoying! i remember one instance where a member told me that i seemed like more of an ISTP. i was like

it also bothers me a little when people post stuff like "my friend says he is an INTP, BUT HE IS TOTALLY NOT"

no one knows you better than you know yourself! it's rude to question someone's type IMO.

While I've never had that happen to me, I can see why that pisses you off. People can't seem to differentiate a person's observable behavior from what's going on in their minds. The person's mindset is not the same as their behavior. To me, the former method of typing people is S while the latter method is more N.

I think it's foolish of people to think they know others just because of the way they talk and behave. What matters is what's going on in the inside. And that's the whole reason why the MBTI is unique as a self-actualization tool. (The FFM seems to take a more sociological perspective.)

 

[Athenian200]

no one knows you better than you know yourself! it's rude to question someone's type IMO.

Not necessarily. People can mistype themselves. It is rude to bring it to their attention (especially publicly) if they don't wish it, but it isn't rude to doubt someone's type or discuss inconsistencies in their behavior with someone else. It may lead you to realize the error they made in typing themselves, which can happen, and thus not allow that error on their part to bias your reading of people's types in future.

You are correct that it's rude to tell someone that they aren't or can't be the type they claim to be, but I don't agree that it's rude to question, especially if the questioning is done internally.

 

[scantilyclad]

Not necessarily. People can mistype themselves. It is rude to bring it to their attention (especially publicly) if they don't wish it, but it isn't rude to doubt someone's type or discuss inconsistencies in their behavior with someone else. It may lead you to realize the error they made in typing themselves, which can happen, and thus not allow that error on their part to bias your reading of people's types in future.

You are correct that it's rude to tell someone that they aren't or can't be the type they claim to be, but I don't agree that it's rude to question, especially if the questioning is done internally.

i did mean to say that it is rude to question it outloud. I do agree that some people might mistype themselves, but people need to figure that out for themselves.

 

[The Ü™]

While I've never had that happen to me, I can see why that pisses you off.

Correction, people at the Enneagram Institute boards seem to type everyone (including myself) as Enneagram 6, for some reason.

 

[Night]

I wear my Fur coat now and again.

 

[INTJMom]

...Why?!? Can't a Thinker act cheery without someone suspecting that they aren't a thinker after all? or vice versa? :steam:
...

It's only the childish, immature people who do that.

 

[Jae Rae]

I dunno... I don't think of it as a T/F thing... I tend to associate 'maximum bubbliness' with EP-ness, to varying degrees.

I used to tell my best ENTP friend he was a closet F. He's on the line for E/I, but definitely P. He seems more bubbly than fluffy, but warm and friendly for sure.

Jae Rae

 

[disregard]

Hmm... the thinkers I know are cheery.. they can laugh at themselves.. they break the law.. they're funny as hell... there is no correlation between thinking and not being able to let loose.

 

[The Ü™]

Hmm... the thinkers I know are cheery.. they can laugh at themselves.. they break the law.. they're funny as hell... there is no correlation between thinking and not being able to let loose.

Theoretically, that correlation is with J.

 

[Totenkindly]

I used to tell my best ENTP friend he was a closet F. He's on the line for E/I, but definitely P. He seems more bubbly than fluffy, but warm and friendly for sure.

That is typical for male ENTPs. The ones I know show that. Their tertiary is Fe. Because of that, they can also be very very affectionate in a "Feeling" sort of way... but that's not their primary way of sorting through things.

With ENTPs, you see their Ne and their Fe... you don't get to see the innards that easily.

 

[INTJMom]

When I think about how cold and mean and angry I used to be, it's scary.

But my history teacher wrote in my yearbook that I brought "sunshine" to his class with my smile. Go figure.

 

[Priam]

I'm always shocked by how many people register me as a "warm, if quiet, presence". Apparently I tend to radiate this placid center as a ground-state, when really it's mostly just me retreating inside and letting everything stay at rest. As well, doing work in "touchy-feely" non-profits usually gets one pegged as a big ole F, usually landing me on the INFP square. Gotta say, just for a day, that could be fun to wear for a little.

Just for a day, though. Then I'd want to pour gasoline over my head and make Buddhist shish kebabs.

 

[nightning]

I dunno... I don't think of it as a T/F thing... I tend to associate 'maximum bubbliness' with EP-ness, to varying degrees.

I agree with that... A ENTP friend of mine can turn very... crazily cheerful for the lack of better words.

And the opposite is IJ... I can be very cold at times.

 

[tovlo]

i did mean to say that it is rude to question it outloud. I do agree that some people might mistype themselves, but people need to figure that out for themselves.

I agree with you. I think it's an overstep of boundaries for people to start telling you what type you are.

I do personally value insight others can offer to my process by sharing how they see me from the outside, but I think it should always be understood by everyone that the only perspective someone outside of yourself can offer is an outside perspective. The only one who knows your internal world is yourself. Those external at best can only get shadow impressions of that internal world.

To impose a judgement of type any more forcefully than an offering of external observational insight to me is a violation of personal boundary and humility.