External Feedback Appreciated

[Lillita]

Despite reading, I'm still uncertain. Any feedback is appreciated. I hesitated to just ask because I dislike the exposed feeling of putting personal information out publicly.

1) What aspect of your personality made you unsure of your type?

Some of the common descriptions of INTJ as having a death glare, others describing them as seeming cold and emotionless, common depictions of them as calculating and manipulative (world domination jokes), I don't relate to. I've tried reading about other types and the functions but it is somewhat overwhelming and nothing has clicked ("Aha, that's me!" moment) just yet.

2) What do you yearn for in life? Why?

Learning mostly. Always looking for mental stimulation and to sate curiosity.

3) Think about a time where you felt like you were at your finest. Tell us what made you feel that way.

During college. It gave me a reason not to isolate myself. Also received amazing feedback from a particular instructor I respected.

4) What makes you feel inferior?

Not much, but I hated when people would ask me what I did for a living while I was disabled with depression/possible hormone imbalance during my teens and twenties.

5) What tends to weigh on your decisions? (Do you think about people, pro-cons, how you feel about it, etc.)

What is most efficient and whether I have the means to realistically make that decision happen.

6) When working on a project what is normally your emphasis? Do you like to have control of the outcome?

Making sure I knew all requirements and being prepared for any potential hiccups that might occur --> As thoroughly as possible gather all relevant information to the project, organizing it by where it needs to go in the final project --> Plug everything into place and review for errors/flaws. I never cared for working in groups being shy/introverted and because others aren't always dependable/competent.

7) Describe a time where you had a lot of fun. How is your memory of it?

A college excursion to the High Museum of Art for an impressionist exhibit. I loved seeing the paintings in person, seeing the textures, and thinking that at another point in time, the artist once stood before the same canvas. It was one of the rare occasions of experiencing something for myself rather than strictly reading about it.

8) When you want to learn something new, what feels more natural for you?

I generally use multiple resources to approach the new subject from various angles. It takes advantage of differing styles of how the subject is presented, whether there is overall congruence in conclusions over time or divergent subtopics to explore.

9) How organized do you think of yourself as?

Fairly organized but not to the point of "neat freak." Clutter is distracting and it helps to counter absent-mindedness.

10) How do you judge new ideas? You try to understand the principles behind it to see if they make sense or do you look for information that supports it?

I tend towards the former.

11) You find harmony by making sure everyone is doing fine and belonging to a given group or by making sure that you follow what you believe and being yourself?

The latter.

12) Are you the kind that thinks before speaking or do you speak before thinking? Do you prefer one-on-one communication or group discussions?

Always think before speaking; often thinking without ever getting to speaking. One-on-one; even amongst family I know and love, I rarely talk in groups.

13) Do you jump into action right away or do you like to know where are you jumping before leaping? Does action speaks more than words?

Plan before doing. Actions do speak louder than words. Case in point: politicians.

14) It's Saturday. You're at home, and your favorite show is about to start. Your friends call you for a night out. What will you do?

This would never happen. I don't watch tv or listen to the radio. Only friends I currently have are immediate family and two people via online gaming that I haven't met in person.

15) How do you act when you're stressed out?

Withdraw.

16) What makes you dislike the personalities of some people?

Talk too much and/or about inane nonsense. Incompetence and laziness; if said person's failure gets in my way, I want to kill them.

Most can be ignored by avoiding people.

17) Is there anything you really like talking about with other people?

Politics, law/criminal justice, philosophy, history, technology, etc. Usually ENTP hubby is on board for it, but he didn't like it when I tried to discuss politics in "bed" recently.

18) What kind of things do you pay the least attention to in your life?

Pop culture I think is the term for it. Also have to keep a personal log to remember if/when regarding self-care (water/meals/etc).

19) How do your friends perceive you? What is wrong about their perception? ? What would your friends never say about your personality ?

This one is hard as social interaction is fairly limited these days. One I've heard overwhelmingly over the years is "weird." Others would be "innocent", "silver tongued", and a mix of appreciating blunt honesty and "I can't believe you said that!" Without being able to compare to a sufficient number of people, I'm unable to say if they are right or wrong in those perceptions or what they would never say.

20) You got a whole day to do whatever you like. What kind of activities do you feel like doing?

Dig around a bookstore, enjoy a drink or two while reading outdoors.

 

[PeaceBaby]

If that's you in the picture of your avatar, I would say you definitely have the look of Ni dom. Welcome to the forum!

 

[Punderstorm]

I haven't seen you before, so welcome to the forum!
INxJ, leaning towards INTJ actually. What functions/types do you kinda relate to?

 

[Lillita]

Ni vs. Ne
Definitely leaning towards Ni of the two as the more open ended and diverse focus of Ne would drive me insane. I usually start as broadly as possible but always start honing in, filtering until I have a clear and concise picture/set of information to work with.
Se vs. Si
Se is not me at all. I tend to be oblivious to my surroundings most of the time and am easily overstimulated. Si, I am keen on order, values, rules, to a point but only if they make sense. It isn't something I do blindly just because it's always been that way or unconditionally respect authority just because it is; competence is required.
Fi vs. Fe
Tend more towards Fi, as I prefer to process emotions internally and only share them externally if it's related to a potential interpersonal misunderstanding (ie, recognize a defensive/angry internal response as reacting to a perceived "lecturing" tone questioning competence, and neutrally discussing that rather than express the anger itself.). While I can and do experience sympathy or empathy for others, I don't relate to the "help/serve others" desire iterated in Fi/Fe descriptions unless it's someone I have a close personal relationship with. I think this is at least partially influenced by being forced to learn to cope with intense emotion while ill (depression or hormone imbalance during teens and twenties) and traumatic events.
Ti vs Te
I relate to the ordered, facts based procedures of Te, but not so much the "aloud" bit. I adored doing literature review research papers throughout school and college. My memory is really bad though, so having the exact information from it's source to reference against helps when trying to discuss/debate a subject with others. Ti, not really seeing the need for the internal consistency checking and it's focus on subjective rather than concrete factual approach. Ti sounds rather useless, honestly.

 

[Reborn Relic]

2 things.

Se vs. Si
Se is not me at all. I tend to be oblivious to my surroundings most of the time and am easily overstimulated. Si, I am keen on order, values, rules, to a point but only if they make sense. It isn't something I do blindly just because it's always been that way or unconditionally respect authority just because it is; competence is required.

Can you give some examples of rules you didn't follow? Rules you did?

Ti vs Te
I relate to the ordered, facts based procedures of Te, but not so much the "aloud" bit. I adored doing literature review research papers throughout school and college. My memory is really bad though, so having the exact information from it's source to reference against helps when trying to discuss/debate a subject with others. Ti, not really seeing the need for the internal consistency checking and it's focus on subjective rather than concrete factual approach. Ti sounds rather useless, honestly.

Ti does see the need for internal consistency according to literature on it, so while I could buy what you're saying depending on what you mean, I'll need you to explain this better.

 

[Lillita]

Off the top of my head, a class I had with questions at the end of chapters we had to answer. The assignments specifically said not to quote the text itself, but rather to summarize it in our own words. Trouble with the that was the book only devoted up to a short paragraph at most to the specific topic being asked about as it was an introductory course. I looked at it as you can't summarize a summary and attempts to do so are merely playing semantics and risk changing the meaning of the material itself. I quoted the text with references anyway and included a disclaimer as to why which my instructor found odd and inquired about stating he hadn't seen that before.

Others are more social or value based rules. For example, if you leave a store and realize you've been given too much change, I've heard others give excuses not to correct it such as "whatever, it makes up for the times I've been overcharged" whereas I'll still go back and fix it under the principle of honesty as it isn't my money to keep, regardless.

As far as what I said regarding Ti, I understood it as cross-referencing for consistency between their own internal ideas and values, as if they have to ask themselves who they are, as if they might stumble upon a contradiction or paradox in their personality or views. I've never felt that need, as I've always had a clear idea of who I was and believed to the point of being anal retentive and dogmatic about it. The closest I can get to that is digging deeper and fleshing out a particular view but not having to ask if it contradicted with another view. I probably could have phrased it better, as it wasn't my intention to dis Ti, but not understanding how the context it would be applicable to can exist. I may have misunderstood it.

 

[BeyondTheGrey]

You could be an INTJ, but you're not a 5. You're a 1.

 

[Lillita]

You could be an INTJ, but you're not a 5. You're a 1.

It's entirely possible. I'm not familiar with Enneagram. The one test I took, showed a bar graph, gave the main type without a wing, and a block of adjectives.

Read actual descriptions of 5s and 1s, and 1s fits much better, thank you.

 

[Reborn Relic]

Sorry for not getting to this.

Off the top of my head, a class I had with questions at the end of chapters we had to answer. The assignments specifically said not to quote the text itself, but rather to summarize it in our own words. Trouble with the that was the book only devoted up to a short paragraph at most to the specific topic being asked about as it was an introductory course. I looked at it as you can't summarize a summary and attempts to do so are merely playing semantics and risk changing the meaning of the material itself. I quoted the text with references anyway and included a disclaimer as to why which my instructor found odd and inquired about stating he hadn't seen that before.

Feels not-SJ to me, but I can't place why.

Others are more social or value based rules. For example, if you leave a store and realize you've been given too much change, I've heard others give excuses not to correct it such as "whatever, it makes up for the times I've been overcharged" whereas I'll still go back and fix it under the principle of honesty as it isn't my money to keep, regardless.

I'd associate with STJs but it's not definitive. Hrmmm.

Any other examples?

As far as what I said regarding Ti, I understood it as cross-referencing for consistency between their own internal ideas and values, as if they have to ask themselves who they are, as if they might stumble upon a contradiction or paradox in their personality or views. I've never felt that need, as I've always had a clear idea of who I was and believed to the point of being anal retentive and dogmatic about it. The closest I can get to that is digging deeper and fleshing out a particular view but not having to ask if it contradicted with another view. I probably could have phrased it better, as it wasn't my intention to dis Ti, but not understanding how the context it would be applicable to can exist. I may have misunderstood it.

Oh, looks like I misread what you said, actually. I thought you said Ti didn't check internal consistency and was weirded out.

But yeah, that does likely rule out Ti dom for ye. I'm not a great typer, so I still haven't come up with a type for you yet, but I wanted to check that and give this a shot. XD (And there was a specific answer you could've given that would've struck me as dom Ni, but if I thought of it and not you maybe it's more of a Ti+Ne answer, hah.)

If I were to attempt to differentiate between STJ and NTJ...first thought is what do you want to do with your life and why?

 

[Lillita]

As far as the honesty example, that value originated from observing my older brother growing up. He was frequently in trouble and would lie. Our parents eventually stopped believing him. I did not want to be in his position so endeavored to be honest no matter the circumstances.

Examples are a little difficult to think of being out of school and the workforce for so long.

Rule I don't follow: My husband gets on to me about wishing family happy birthday or happy mother's/father's day. The default well wishes seem canned, meaningless and insincere, so I generally refrain from saying anything at all. I'm not keen on holidays in general. I look at holidays as socially and commercially forced expectations. I'd rather do or express those things because I chose to at any point in time, rather than because I'm obligated to lest it be taken as not caring.

Rule I do follow: Traffic laws to the utmost of my ability. Annoys me to no end watching drivers tailgate, using turning lanes as passing lanes, rolling stops at stop signs, etc. I follow them under the same principle I use with my 9 yo son sometimes. What happens as an increasing number of people don't follow the rule/law? Hate it all the more when some people whine when they are caught but also complain when others disregarding it inconveniences them.

I'm not entirely sure what I want do with my life outside of reading/learning. Originally I was fascinated with the human body, what it looked like internally and how it functioned. I didn't pursue it in the end because all I knew was medical school was exceedingly expensive and was unaware of grants, scholarships and loans. I'd still love to do forensics of some kind for the same reason, but can't stomach the amount of debt it would involve. I've only managed an A.S. in Criminal Justice thanks to Georgia's Pell Grant and scholarship but it wouldn't be enough to cover further education. I'm the only one in my family with a degree (as worthless as it might be, haha) so it was confusing trying to figure out how to go about navigating the system.

Interests went human biology/anatomy-->animator/portrait artist-->foreign language-->criminal justice/law/forensics over the years. I never completely abandoned any of them, but cycle through them, sometimes, dabbling in more than one at a time. With deciding on a life goal, it's a mix of what seems attainable (cost/opportunity) and a cross of interest and contribution. The latter is why I don't talk much in general. There's this idea that unless I'm more knowledgeable or able to bring something new, there's no point in putting myself out there rather than staying quiet and observing/learning more.