[ENTP] ENTPs.... do you come across as being romantic in relationships?

[Intricate Mystic]

I've read that ENTPs frequently have this characteristic. Have you found this to be true in your relationships?

 

[BlahBlahNounBlah]

Absolutely, completely, 1,000% ... if I'm serious about the relationship.

 

[LEVINA]

I am a girl. What would be considered romantic in a guy's point of view?

But not really, a dinner at a romantic restraunt with roses and the titanic theme music while he slowly proposes is a extreme turn off.
I get extremely uncomfortable expressing "love". I passionately hate the fluffy feeling.
It feels like you're being suffocated. I need to laugh a little, act crazy, or be with myself after that (Which is one of the few times I do want to be with myself).

Maybe I am a mistyped SP.

 

[BlahBlahNounBlah]

I am a girl. What would be considered romantic in a guy's point of view?

But not really, a dinner at a romantic restraunt with roses and the titanic theme music while he slowly proposes is a extreme turn off.
I get extremely uncomfortable expressing "love". I passionately hate the fluffy feeling.
It feels like you're being suffocated. I need to laugh a little, act crazy, or be with myself after that (Which is one of the few times I do want to be with myself).

Maybe I am a mistyped SP.

I think it's more that you're using cliches to define romance.

 

[LEVINA]

I think it's more that you're using cliches to define romance.

Yeah maybe. Maybe I'm also using more of my feelings toward other types of love. I really do not like fluffy feelings.

Going by this, I have a tendency to push people away whenever I get that feeling.

Question now: I can't really say anymore about the topic unless I know what kind of romance you guys ment. If everybody has their own idea of romance, I can't really say anything else. I just generally find the whole cheesy "in love" jazz a very ...well- cheesy and un-easy thing!

 

[Qre:us]

I am a girl. What would be considered romantic in a guy's point of view?

But not really, a dinner at a romantic restraunt with roses and the titanic theme music while he slowly proposes is a extreme turn off.
I get extremely uncomfortable expressing "love". I passionately hate the fluffy feeling.
It feels like you're being suffocated. I need to laugh a little, act crazy, or be with myself after that (Which is one of the few times I do want to be with myself).

Maybe I am a mistyped SP.

+1, I can relate.

I think it's more that you're using cliches to define romance.

Very possible.

Yeah maybe. Maybe I'm also using more of my feelings toward other types of love. I really do not like fluffy feelings.

Going by this, I have a tendency to push people away whenever I get that feeling.

For me, I feel a bit ridiculous taking such gestures seriously, and, there's a little child inside of me that can't help but giggle when another is trying to be serious serious with such gestures of grande romance.

I kinda feel embarrassed for them, if the gestures are 'cheesy', and my cheese factor is set on ultra-sensitive trigger.

What I try to achieve, and appreciate in the other: uniqueness in idea earns major points, esp. if it's catered to the subtlety of our relationship; some quirk of his or mine, and playing on that is and .

But....

Learning to move from a position of detachment to attachment is not always a smooth transition, for me, in the realm of intimacy and feeeeeelings.

Awkwardness at trying to decipher between what's trite and what has depth of truth for me, him, us. Sometimes feels like playing naked bumper cars. Some kinda bumping, but, not exactly the bumps ya want...weird gigglejiggles.

Ya fallow? Prolly not.

 

[BlahBlahNounBlah]

For me, truly romantic gestures include an element of humor. They acknowledge the idea of grand romantic gestures and mock them, but gently ... in a way that acknowledges their worth.


It's not romantic unless it's clever.

 

[Qre:us]

For me, truly romantic gestures include an element of humor. They acknowledge the idea of grand romantic gestures and mock them, but gently ... in a way that acknowledges their worth.


It's not romantic unless it's clever.

Ohhhh...



LaughterHumour is the best medicine.

 

[neptunesnet]

I'm an INFP, and I was in a fantastic relationship with an ENTP for a while.
He was pretty romantic. Though he was never the cards-and-flowers type of guy, I didn't need any reassurance from him in our relationship. He gave me--surprisingly since he is after all a charming, flirtatious, and independent ENTP--lots (and lots) of attention. Which I loved because he listened to me. I'm very simple and am really uncomfortable when someone lavishes me with things I consider wasteful or excessive (diamonds, expensive dinners, etc.), so his disdain for the trite and mundane and my dislike of empty traditions worked for us!
I think it ultimately depends on the person and the type of relationship.

 

[paperoceans]

I am the complete opposite of romantic... Actually, you might as well call me the Stalin of romance. Not my thing. That mushy corny stuff really turns me off. If being "romantic" means actually listening to my partner and being there for them... then sure! If I am shopping somewhere and see something that I know that they like (say he collects comic books or whatever) than I would buy him one. IDK, that's how I ~express my love. I'm not very affectionate or open with my feelings. It's just not me at all.

[edit] ah, yes. I fall for someone who I can joke around with and tease. That's love to me right there! I hate it when people are always trying to get me to be so "serious". It's so ridiculous. It makes me feel like that person doesn't appreciate me for the type of person that I am. I do not like flowers, teddy bears, chocolates, etc. That's just so typical and not well thought out. The type of gestures that really have me going "aww" is if we're having a conversation and I say... I do not know, that I love bananas and that I eat them three times a day (I really do...). Weeks from then, if he randomly buys me a shit load of bananas I would be so moved. It's so easy to please me. I don't need diamonds and shit.

To me, romance is listening to that person

 

[paperoceans]

I am a girl. What would be considered romantic in a guy's point of view?

But not really, a dinner at a romantic restraunt with roses and the titanic theme music while he slowly proposes is a extreme turn off.
I get extremely uncomfortable expressing "love". I passionately hate the fluffy feeling.
It feels like you're being suffocated. I need to laugh a little, act crazy, or be with myself after that (Which is one of the few times I do want to be with myself).

Maybe I am a mistyped SP.

Exactly. It just feels so unnatural and uncomfortable to me.

 

[BlahBlahNounBlah]

As stated, I'm very romantic ... but one thing that does make me bristle is too much nostalgia. I do not want to repeatedly revisit an idealized event that happened five years ago. It's over, usually falsified, and means little to me.


As long as we're in the here and future, however, bring it on!

 

[SerengetiBetty]

I'd say yes. When I'm serious about the relationship I'm very thoughtful and affectionate ..

For me, truly romantic gestures include an element of humor. They acknowledge the idea of grand romantic gestures and mock them, but gently ... in a way that acknowledges their worth.


It's not romantic unless it's clever.

Agreed. I've gone out with some traditionally romantic guys (flowers, candies, shiny gifts, etc) and although it's not my favorite display of appreciation, I understand their need to do it that way and accept. I mean after all, who doesn't like sweet stuff and sparkly things?

 

[substitute]

I am a girl. What would be considered romantic in a guy's point of view?

But not really, a dinner at a romantic restraunt with roses and the titanic theme music while he slowly proposes is a extreme turn off.
I get extremely uncomfortable expressing "love". I passionately hate the fluffy feeling.
It feels like you're being suffocated. I need to laugh a little, act crazy, or be with myself after that (Which is one of the few times I do want to be with myself).

yeah, I hate that stuff too. that's why I either avoided doing it at all and went for something that was wild and lively - I mean, why would I be out with someone at all anyway, if they weren't the sorta person who could enjoy (and survive) a walk on the wild side? or else if I did the cliché stuff I'd always try and just put some touches to it that made it "not your average meal at a restaurant" - something different that made it memorable.

I mean, take one common or garden restaurant, a standard table setting, the expected choices and prices on the menu and everything's predictable and scripted. Add one average ENTP and suddenly there are unknowns... it can be fun to keep them on the edge of embarrassment permanently, yet never quite crossing that line - keep them guessing as to whether you're going to do something outrageous, which means you have to actually do something outrageous now and again and get away with it. I find with less naturally adventurous types they tell you off for it in that way where the mouth is saying "stop it" but the eyes and tone of voice are saying "don't stop it!" and you know they're secretly thrilled.

But I grew up on medieval literature - how could I not be romantic? It raised me and I grew up to live it - all that open-handed ring-giving, largesse, noblesse, gentilesse etc has made me a noble knight, loved by all at court, yet also a scarred and terminally poor knight, whom the damsels' fathers never approve of, just like the ones in the books

 

[simulatedworld]

Absolutely, completely, 1,000% ... if I'm serious about the relationship.

This really says it all, without directly saying it. How ENTP!

Anyway, yeah, I believe the point of her ellipses here is that it's very rare for us to care enough about someone to be serious about the relationship.

If you absolutely blow us away with how amazing you are, then we'll rise to the challenge and top it.

If you're not really that interesting, we're not trying. (But we do recognize and sometimes imitate certain "romantic" tactics that we notice are successful, when it benefits us.)

 

[BlahBlahNounBlah]

This really says it all, without directly saying it. How ENTP!

Anyway, yeah, I believe the point of her ellipses here is that it's very rare for us to care enough about someone to be serious about the relationship.

If you absolutely blow us away with how amazing you are, then we'll rise to the challenge and top it.

If you're not really that interesting, we're not trying. (But we do recognize and sometimes imitate certain "romantic" tactics that we notice are successful, when it benefits us.)

+5 million

 

[Intricate Mystic]

This really says it all, without directly saying it. How ENTP!

Anyway, yeah, I believe the point of her ellipses here is that it's very rare for us to care enough about someone to be serious about the relationship.

If you absolutely blow us away with how amazing you are, then we'll rise to the challenge and top it.

If you're not really that interesting, we're not trying. (But we do recognize and sometimes imitate certain "romantic" tactics that we notice are successful, when it benefits us.)

So you do like being romantic, but only a lucky few are recipients of it?

 

[SerengetiBetty]

This really says it all, without directly saying it. How ENTP!

Anyway, yeah, I believe the point of her ellipses here is that it's very rare for us to care enough about someone to be serious about the relationship.

If you absolutely blow us away with how amazing you are, then we'll rise to the challenge and top it.

If you're not really that interesting, we're not trying. (But we do recognize and sometimes imitate certain "romantic" tactics that we notice are successful, when it benefits us.)

So you do like being romantic, but only a lucky few are recipients of it?

i guess it's like those cereal box sweepstakes: many will enter, few will win.

 

[digesthisickness]

This really says it all, without directly saying it. How ENTP!

Anyway, yeah, I believe the point of her ellipses here is that it's very rare for us to care enough about someone to be serious about the relationship.

If you absolutely blow us away with how amazing you are, then we'll rise to the challenge and top it.

If you're not really that interesting, we're not trying. (But we do recognize and sometimes imitate certain "romantic" tactics that we notice are successful, when it benefits us.)

ding ding ding.

 

[tinkerbell]

I can be romantic, but not a cheesy way... I like t enjoy simiple things - so might not be everyones idea of romantic.

I am with StimW its a rare thing to find someone I want to be romantic with... but it doens't negate amerous abities