[INFP] ENFPs and time alone

[phoenix31]

I was reading the Wikipedia article about ENFPs and it says they need time alone. I have also noticed with an ENFP I'm close to that he is very outgoing and enjoys people, but gets cranky if he doesn't have time alone and really needs that time.

Isn't that an introvert thing? I'm confused. Can anyone shed light on this for me?

I'm also curious if other ENFPs find this alone time needed in their lives, and I'm curious if other E types need time alone.


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[Starry]

I was reading the Wikipedia article about ENFPs and it says they need time alone. I have also noticed with an ENFP I'm close to that he is very outgoing and enjoys people, but gets cranky if he doesn't have time alone and really needs that time.

Isn't that an introvert thing? I'm confused. Can anyone shed light on this for me?

I'm also curious if other ENFPs find this alone time needed in their lives, and I'm curious if other E types need time alone.


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It's just the nature of Extroverted Intuition. Like, when you say "very outgoing" above what do you mean? It seems to me that people primarily use that term to describe someone that seeks out people...and yet for me...while I adore so many people from a distance...I'm generally trying to get away from them. There's just too much going on in my mind not to be on an ongoing mission to try and synthesize it. When you are constantly around people this is impossible to do (unless they are discussing it with you but it is rare I find people interested in what I'm interested in). I mean, I could be around an intimate that wasn't talking to me...I don't necessarily need to be alone...alone. But I need obscene amounts of time to piece together all the impossibilities.

 

[phoenix31]

By outgoing, I meant enjoys talking with people, meeting new people, seems to be energized from it, etc.


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[Starry]

By outgoing, I meant enjoys talking with people, meeting new people, seems to be energized from it, etc.


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yes, I forgot to include that I'm outgoing for experience only...I don't seek out people for people's sake beyond intimates. If I connect with another person or group of people via experience that I enjoy I will get tons of energy from them. If I encounter another person or group of people via experience that I don't feel connected with but for some reason they are still wanting to hang with me and because I'm a sick feeler I will sometimes feel *bad* if I want to get away from them and then I'm totally distracted and confused and looking for cliffs or bridges to jump off of...

 

[chado]

how about another word for your mother

 

[Starry]

how about another word for your mother

Your mama's so fat...

 

[ceecee]

I was reading the Wikipedia article about ENFPs and it says they need time alone. I have also noticed with an ENFP I'm close to that he is very outgoing and enjoys people, but gets cranky if he doesn't have time alone and really needs that time.

Isn't that an introvert thing? I'm confused. Can anyone shed light on this for me?

I'm also curious if other ENFPs find this alone time needed in their lives, and I'm curious if other E types need time alone.


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Every E I know needs alone time. Especially the ENFP's. My ENFJ does too. It's not just an introverted thing.

 

[phoenix31]

I thought the whole difference between introverts and extroverts was whether or not they derived energy from being with people vs. being alone. So I'm all kinds of confused.


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[ceecee]

I thought the whole difference between introverts and extroverts was whether or not they derived energy from being with people vs. being alone. So I'm all kinds of confused.

Yes, that's correct but it doesn't mean they need unlimited interaction to be happy. One of my ENFP friends like to lay on the couch or on her bed and simply spend time with me or anyone else, quietly, maybe a little talking but mostly not. I don't know why this is confusing to you, everyone needs some decompression some of the time.

 

[phoenix31]

The reason it's confusing is I had the impression that extroverts would get tired or restless being alone just like it's tiring for introverts to be with people. So I thought the E way of decompressing would be to be around people. *shrugs*


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[ceecee]

The reason it's confusing is I had the impression that extroverts would get tired or restless being alone just like it's tiring for introverts to be with people. So I thought the E way of decompressing would be to be around people. *shrugs*


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Let me put it this way. My ENFP friend wants quiet time but doesn't want to be alone. I don't get it but ok. If people are around and she is decompressing (watching TV, playing games on her phone, reading...) but there is someone around in her house - that is what she would like best. To me, that is the difference between introversion and extroversion. She needs some sort of presence for whatever reason, even if she never interacts with them during that time.

 

[fetus]

It really depends on the person, to be honest. I have heard that ENFPs are the most introverted of the extroverts, but I've recently been shying away from making sweeping judgments about types. ENTPs are also supposed to be an introverted extrovert, but I know one who said only half-jokingly that she would get antsy after a ten minute walk by herself.

I'm a very "introverted" ESFJ. I need a lot of time by myself and could happily go several days without seeing anybody. It's really more about where you primarily get your energy and which way your thoughts flow, or cognition. The E/I thing really is a spectrum.

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

By outgoing, I meant enjoys talking with people, meeting new people, seems to be energized from it, etc.


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My ENFP told me being with people, interacting with them brings him happiness. If he avoids it too long, he becomes depressed, sad.

That's the opposite of an introvert. Being alone brings me happiness, if I'm around people, interacting a lot and avoid time alone, become irritable, angry...

We both value time alone and socializing but where the emphasis is for fulfillment is different.