Hank
New member
- Joined
- Oct 18, 2015
- Messages
- 32
- MBTI Type
- ENFP
- Enneagram
- 749
- Instinctual Variant
- sx/so
Hey guys! I've been wondering for a while if I'm typed correctly. I'm curious to get all y'alls' opinions. I'm also very undecided about my Enneagram, so feel free to chime in on that, too!
This questionnaire is taken from the Personality Cafe portion of the Questionnaire Compilation Thread.
Also, sorry if my answers get too short or repetitive. I wasn't sure how else to build on some of those. Feel free to tell me if I need to elaborate.
1) What aspect of your personality made you unsure of your type?
Ever since graduating college and starting into the "real world," I've felt this weird inability to act outside of people's expectations for me creep in on me. It baffles me. I've always been a little ambiverted (haha, never heard an XNFP say that before, amirite) but I definitely have decreased social interaction since graduation. There's some part of me that wonders if I'm actually an INFP and this is just me growing into Si. I used to have a bigger circle of friends, but many of them moved away for school and/or we grew apart. I haven't figured out a really good way of making new friends when you're in your 20's and not into the bar scene (and you live in the middle of nowhere), so maybe that's part of it, too?
In social circles, I'm MUCH more of a listener than a talker than I've ever been--mostly because of two reasons:
1. The other people are so talkative that I don't feel like competing for space, or
2. The other people are so different from me that I don't want to describe my thoughts things for fear of the other people thinking I'm weird or disliking me.
I used to be more of the person I'd have to compete with for space--I'd never shut up. Now, I don't really put in the effort to say my piece unless asked or if I feel like I know the person well enough. But I can't figure out if that's me growing up or if that's me being mistyped or if it's something else (like a loop.)
2) What do you yearn for in life? Why?
I want to be happy, and I want to make other people happy. That's about it. It makes me happy to see other people being happy. It makes me sick to think of going through life paying bills and mowing the grass and grumbling about taxes and politicians and suddenly waking up at age 70 feeling like I've wasted my years. Ugh, it gives me a yucky feeling just to type that. I'd rather have no money and live in a cardboard box and be at peace and happy than have a bunch of money and a big fancy house and a white picket fence and feel trapped.
If I had the money for it, I'd own my own children's museum (or something else that appeals to entire families.) That's the best dream I've come up with so far that embodies everything I'd rather do with my life.
3) Think about a time where you felt like you were at your finest. Tell us what made you feel that way.
I don't have a good answer for this right now. I'll get back with you.
4) What makes you feel inferior?
When other people embody traits I want to see in myself better than I can. I don't get jealous often, but that will do it like none other. I've recently had (what I suspect is) an ENFJ enter my life who has a lot of traits that I want to grow into myself, and that guy drives me insane if I don't force myself to look objectively at his accomplishments in life.
I have a tendency to automatically view most authority figures as more knowledgeable than me, but I feel like that's more due to my SJ home life than anything else. Actually, I also tend to automatically assume other people (not even just authority figures) are more knowledgeable than me on a lot of things. I think I have a bit of an inferiority complex, to be honest.
5) What tends to weigh on your decisions? (Do you think about people, pro-cons, how you feel about it, etc.)
Hank's hierarchy of (self-centered) decision making, in order from most to least important (with least important still being important):
1. Am I morally okay with [option]?
2. Am I going to have to deal with negativity from other people if I choose [option]?
3. Does [option] make sense to me?
4. What are the opinions of the people whose opinions I care about on this decision? Does his/her/their opinion(s) make sense? Am I okay with potentially going against his/her/their opinion(s) if it doesn't make sense or if I don't feel like they've properly understood the decision?
5. Do I have all the information I should have in order to make this decision?/Is there an aspect of this decision that I haven't considered?
6. Do I or anyone else actually care about the outcome of the decision? If not, then I'll bypass 1 through 5 and just make a decision.
6) When working on a project what is normally your emphasis? Do you like to have control of the outcome?
I want the outcome of the project to be better than anyone expected. Below that, I want the job to be done thoroughly. Budget and timeline are the last things on my mind. It's indefinitely better to me to do a project well and turn it in late than to half-do a project, get it done early/on time, and then spend a bunch of time picking up the pieces of all the stuff we did wrong.
To that end, I want EVERYONE's input during the project, and I don't care if that means that someone speaks up in the eleventh hour and points out something that requires us to start over. If it can be done better, it should be done better. There is no point in half-doing anything we've definitely decided to do. And in order for that to happen, the culture of the group has to be one where everyone is civil, friendly, and open to criticism/improvement. Some of the worst projects I've ever worked on have been ones where people designated themselves the leader of the group, rejected all criticism, and existed to dole out work in the name of "demanding quality." Yuck.
7) Describe a time where you had a lot of fun. How is your memory of it?
I love to do something new with people I like. I realize that's not a specific instance, but that's because a lot of my instances revolve around that idea. Traveling with friends to new places is a lot of what I do, and that's a lot of fun for me--whether we're trying to find some niche, highfalutin ice cream shop in some big city or going to some town with a weird name just to see what's there, that's my jam. I love the memories of laughing at awkward moments or experiencing something we think is awesome and talk about for the next hundred times we hang out. There's nothing better for me. (My Love Languages are Quality Time and Words of Affirmation, by the by.)
8) When you want to learn something new, what feels more natural for you?
Just diving in headfirst and devouring as much information about it as I can, usually via Google. I tend to jump from topic to topic pretty quickly, eating up as much info on each one as my attention span will let me. That's basically it.
9) How organized do you think of yourself as?
Hahahahahahaha. Not at all. I'm a mess in the organization department. I have an awful tendency of not writing things down, so I have to remember to do whatever instead of having a calendar. It's gotten me in trouble before.
10) How do you judge new ideas? You try to understand the principles behind it to see if they make sense or do you look for information that supports it?
I definitely try to understand the principles behind it. I'd much rather understand how that theory was formed than read all the proof that it's legitimate. If I understand how the principles work behind it, then all the proof is kinda useless to me. If something comes up that proves the idea wrong, though, then I definitely want to explore the proof and compare it to the exception to see why one worked and the other didn't.
11) You find harmony by making sure everyone is doing fine and belonging to a given group or by making sure that you follow what you believe and being yourself?
I put more emphasis on following what I believe and in being myself, but one of the things that is important to me is to make sure everyone is doing fine. (Is that a bad answer? I feel like that's a bad answer. It's true, though.) I feel like it's self-centered of me to look at most situations and say, "Welp, I'm good with how things are here. That's all that matters!" I have to pay attention to what other people feel in order to actually find harmony anywhere. I need to feel good about a situation, but I also want the other people involved to feel good about it, too.
12) Are you the kind that thinks before speaking or do you speak before thinking? Do you prefer one-on-one communication or group discussions?
It's situation-specific for me, but I find myself thinking more before speaking. Speaking before thinking is usually reserved for the people I know well enough to know they won't be offended if I say the wrong thing.
I'm mostly indifferent to one-on-one vs. group conversations. They're both fine with me, as long as the people I'm talking to are nice enough to talk to. I'm not fond of public speaking, but I'll do it if I have to.
13) Do you jump into action right away or do you like to know where are you jumping before leaping? Does action speaks more than words?
Jump right away! What is life without spontaneity?! Dull, that's what.
Actions always, always, always speak louder than words. You can describe yourself as Mother Theresa, but if you actually act like Hitler, your words mean nothing. Similarly, if you say you believe in some cause but don't actually follow that through with actions, you're going to lose credibility with me quickly. It's like if your friend is drowning and you're standing at the end of the pier saying "I believe in you! You can swim your way out of this!"
14) It's Saturday. You're at home, and your favorite show is about to start. Your friends call you for a night out. What will you do?
Ideally, I'd either invite them in to watch with me or go join them. Hanging out with friends always trumps spending time alone.
15) How do you act when you're stressed out?
I get moody. It's awful. If I'm not already quiet, I get quiet, and it overwhelms me really easily if I have to explain anything to anyone. And if people bring up a question that annoys me, I can have a hard time hiding my annoyance. Basically, my filter gets a little thin and I'm too busy worrying about whatever to do a good job at keeping the filter up.
16) What makes you dislike the personalities of some people?
Disregard for other people's feelings, mainly. I have no issue with logic-oriented personalities in general, but it gets under my skin SO MUCH when they're tactless. Like, it's okay if you think the things I think (or others think) are stupid, but if you blurt out "that's stupid" as soon as I/others describe our likes/thoughts/whatever, you're really, really starting out on the wrong foot with me. Harsh criticism is a completely necessary part of life, but sometimes your logic isn't necessary. (This thread is not an example of that, by the way--be honest!)
To a lesser extent, it wears me down when people are TOO too emotional for too long. I admit that I am fully guilty of this from time to time, but... You know how, sometimes, certain people are incapable of being positive about anything on overcast/rainy days? Ugh. That wears me out super bad. Like, I get that it's not happy, but it's also not the end of the world. Take a deep breath.
17) Is there anything you really like talking about with other people?
I am thoroughly an sx instinctual variant--it's one thing I'm most certain of for myself in typology. I live for getting to know people on deeper levels and being able to have really good, deep conversations where we can share stuff with each other that we wouldn't normally feel comfortable sharing. I kinda hate how I've described it here--it sounds like I exist to unveil everyone's secrets and then leave, which isn't the case. I just enjoy reaching that level of closeness. It's just a good feeling to be able to trust each other.
Beyond that, I like talking to people about things they're passionate about. Passion in people is one of the most attractive things ever, both in a romantic sense and a platonic sense. Even if it's not something I understand having a passion about, I want to hear why you like it. Shoot, I especially like it if it's not something I understand having a passion about. Tell me about why your porcelain salt and pepper shaker collection is why you wake up in the morning. I'm all ears.
Similarly, I also love it when other people and I can share knowledge about stuff that the other doesn't know anything about. It's fun to learn new stuff. It's also fun to tell people about stuff and have them get as obsessed with it as you are.
18) What kind of things do you pay the least attention to in your life?
Sports results, the evening news, Donald Trump's voice, and my family's never-ending requests to get married and produce grandchildren. (I'm kidding. I don't know.)
19) How do your friends perceive you? What is wrong about their perception? What would your friends never say about your personality?
I'm not sure of what my answer is for this. I'll get back with you.
20) You got a whole day to do whatever you like. What kind of activities do you feel like doing?
Let's go eat food from some country whose food we've never tried before. You tell me about whatever's on your mind. I'll reciprocate and then probably talk about Myers-Briggs. We'll go see a movie. And so on.
This questionnaire is taken from the Personality Cafe portion of the Questionnaire Compilation Thread.
Also, sorry if my answers get too short or repetitive. I wasn't sure how else to build on some of those. Feel free to tell me if I need to elaborate.
1) What aspect of your personality made you unsure of your type?
Ever since graduating college and starting into the "real world," I've felt this weird inability to act outside of people's expectations for me creep in on me. It baffles me. I've always been a little ambiverted (haha, never heard an XNFP say that before, amirite) but I definitely have decreased social interaction since graduation. There's some part of me that wonders if I'm actually an INFP and this is just me growing into Si. I used to have a bigger circle of friends, but many of them moved away for school and/or we grew apart. I haven't figured out a really good way of making new friends when you're in your 20's and not into the bar scene (and you live in the middle of nowhere), so maybe that's part of it, too?
In social circles, I'm MUCH more of a listener than a talker than I've ever been--mostly because of two reasons:
1. The other people are so talkative that I don't feel like competing for space, or
2. The other people are so different from me that I don't want to describe my thoughts things for fear of the other people thinking I'm weird or disliking me.
I used to be more of the person I'd have to compete with for space--I'd never shut up. Now, I don't really put in the effort to say my piece unless asked or if I feel like I know the person well enough. But I can't figure out if that's me growing up or if that's me being mistyped or if it's something else (like a loop.)
2) What do you yearn for in life? Why?
I want to be happy, and I want to make other people happy. That's about it. It makes me happy to see other people being happy. It makes me sick to think of going through life paying bills and mowing the grass and grumbling about taxes and politicians and suddenly waking up at age 70 feeling like I've wasted my years. Ugh, it gives me a yucky feeling just to type that. I'd rather have no money and live in a cardboard box and be at peace and happy than have a bunch of money and a big fancy house and a white picket fence and feel trapped.
If I had the money for it, I'd own my own children's museum (or something else that appeals to entire families.) That's the best dream I've come up with so far that embodies everything I'd rather do with my life.
3) Think about a time where you felt like you were at your finest. Tell us what made you feel that way.
I don't have a good answer for this right now. I'll get back with you.
4) What makes you feel inferior?
When other people embody traits I want to see in myself better than I can. I don't get jealous often, but that will do it like none other. I've recently had (what I suspect is) an ENFJ enter my life who has a lot of traits that I want to grow into myself, and that guy drives me insane if I don't force myself to look objectively at his accomplishments in life.
I have a tendency to automatically view most authority figures as more knowledgeable than me, but I feel like that's more due to my SJ home life than anything else. Actually, I also tend to automatically assume other people (not even just authority figures) are more knowledgeable than me on a lot of things. I think I have a bit of an inferiority complex, to be honest.
5) What tends to weigh on your decisions? (Do you think about people, pro-cons, how you feel about it, etc.)
Hank's hierarchy of (self-centered) decision making, in order from most to least important (with least important still being important):
1. Am I morally okay with [option]?
2. Am I going to have to deal with negativity from other people if I choose [option]?
3. Does [option] make sense to me?
4. What are the opinions of the people whose opinions I care about on this decision? Does his/her/their opinion(s) make sense? Am I okay with potentially going against his/her/their opinion(s) if it doesn't make sense or if I don't feel like they've properly understood the decision?
5. Do I have all the information I should have in order to make this decision?/Is there an aspect of this decision that I haven't considered?
6. Do I or anyone else actually care about the outcome of the decision? If not, then I'll bypass 1 through 5 and just make a decision.
6) When working on a project what is normally your emphasis? Do you like to have control of the outcome?
I want the outcome of the project to be better than anyone expected. Below that, I want the job to be done thoroughly. Budget and timeline are the last things on my mind. It's indefinitely better to me to do a project well and turn it in late than to half-do a project, get it done early/on time, and then spend a bunch of time picking up the pieces of all the stuff we did wrong.
To that end, I want EVERYONE's input during the project, and I don't care if that means that someone speaks up in the eleventh hour and points out something that requires us to start over. If it can be done better, it should be done better. There is no point in half-doing anything we've definitely decided to do. And in order for that to happen, the culture of the group has to be one where everyone is civil, friendly, and open to criticism/improvement. Some of the worst projects I've ever worked on have been ones where people designated themselves the leader of the group, rejected all criticism, and existed to dole out work in the name of "demanding quality." Yuck.
7) Describe a time where you had a lot of fun. How is your memory of it?
I love to do something new with people I like. I realize that's not a specific instance, but that's because a lot of my instances revolve around that idea. Traveling with friends to new places is a lot of what I do, and that's a lot of fun for me--whether we're trying to find some niche, highfalutin ice cream shop in some big city or going to some town with a weird name just to see what's there, that's my jam. I love the memories of laughing at awkward moments or experiencing something we think is awesome and talk about for the next hundred times we hang out. There's nothing better for me. (My Love Languages are Quality Time and Words of Affirmation, by the by.)
8) When you want to learn something new, what feels more natural for you?
Just diving in headfirst and devouring as much information about it as I can, usually via Google. I tend to jump from topic to topic pretty quickly, eating up as much info on each one as my attention span will let me. That's basically it.
9) How organized do you think of yourself as?
Hahahahahahaha. Not at all. I'm a mess in the organization department. I have an awful tendency of not writing things down, so I have to remember to do whatever instead of having a calendar. It's gotten me in trouble before.
10) How do you judge new ideas? You try to understand the principles behind it to see if they make sense or do you look for information that supports it?
I definitely try to understand the principles behind it. I'd much rather understand how that theory was formed than read all the proof that it's legitimate. If I understand how the principles work behind it, then all the proof is kinda useless to me. If something comes up that proves the idea wrong, though, then I definitely want to explore the proof and compare it to the exception to see why one worked and the other didn't.
11) You find harmony by making sure everyone is doing fine and belonging to a given group or by making sure that you follow what you believe and being yourself?
I put more emphasis on following what I believe and in being myself, but one of the things that is important to me is to make sure everyone is doing fine. (Is that a bad answer? I feel like that's a bad answer. It's true, though.) I feel like it's self-centered of me to look at most situations and say, "Welp, I'm good with how things are here. That's all that matters!" I have to pay attention to what other people feel in order to actually find harmony anywhere. I need to feel good about a situation, but I also want the other people involved to feel good about it, too.
12) Are you the kind that thinks before speaking or do you speak before thinking? Do you prefer one-on-one communication or group discussions?
It's situation-specific for me, but I find myself thinking more before speaking. Speaking before thinking is usually reserved for the people I know well enough to know they won't be offended if I say the wrong thing.
I'm mostly indifferent to one-on-one vs. group conversations. They're both fine with me, as long as the people I'm talking to are nice enough to talk to. I'm not fond of public speaking, but I'll do it if I have to.
13) Do you jump into action right away or do you like to know where are you jumping before leaping? Does action speaks more than words?
Jump right away! What is life without spontaneity?! Dull, that's what.
Actions always, always, always speak louder than words. You can describe yourself as Mother Theresa, but if you actually act like Hitler, your words mean nothing. Similarly, if you say you believe in some cause but don't actually follow that through with actions, you're going to lose credibility with me quickly. It's like if your friend is drowning and you're standing at the end of the pier saying "I believe in you! You can swim your way out of this!"
14) It's Saturday. You're at home, and your favorite show is about to start. Your friends call you for a night out. What will you do?
Ideally, I'd either invite them in to watch with me or go join them. Hanging out with friends always trumps spending time alone.
15) How do you act when you're stressed out?
I get moody. It's awful. If I'm not already quiet, I get quiet, and it overwhelms me really easily if I have to explain anything to anyone. And if people bring up a question that annoys me, I can have a hard time hiding my annoyance. Basically, my filter gets a little thin and I'm too busy worrying about whatever to do a good job at keeping the filter up.
16) What makes you dislike the personalities of some people?
Disregard for other people's feelings, mainly. I have no issue with logic-oriented personalities in general, but it gets under my skin SO MUCH when they're tactless. Like, it's okay if you think the things I think (or others think) are stupid, but if you blurt out "that's stupid" as soon as I/others describe our likes/thoughts/whatever, you're really, really starting out on the wrong foot with me. Harsh criticism is a completely necessary part of life, but sometimes your logic isn't necessary. (This thread is not an example of that, by the way--be honest!)
To a lesser extent, it wears me down when people are TOO too emotional for too long. I admit that I am fully guilty of this from time to time, but... You know how, sometimes, certain people are incapable of being positive about anything on overcast/rainy days? Ugh. That wears me out super bad. Like, I get that it's not happy, but it's also not the end of the world. Take a deep breath.
17) Is there anything you really like talking about with other people?
I am thoroughly an sx instinctual variant--it's one thing I'm most certain of for myself in typology. I live for getting to know people on deeper levels and being able to have really good, deep conversations where we can share stuff with each other that we wouldn't normally feel comfortable sharing. I kinda hate how I've described it here--it sounds like I exist to unveil everyone's secrets and then leave, which isn't the case. I just enjoy reaching that level of closeness. It's just a good feeling to be able to trust each other.
Beyond that, I like talking to people about things they're passionate about. Passion in people is one of the most attractive things ever, both in a romantic sense and a platonic sense. Even if it's not something I understand having a passion about, I want to hear why you like it. Shoot, I especially like it if it's not something I understand having a passion about. Tell me about why your porcelain salt and pepper shaker collection is why you wake up in the morning. I'm all ears.
Similarly, I also love it when other people and I can share knowledge about stuff that the other doesn't know anything about. It's fun to learn new stuff. It's also fun to tell people about stuff and have them get as obsessed with it as you are.
18) What kind of things do you pay the least attention to in your life?
Sports results, the evening news, Donald Trump's voice, and my family's never-ending requests to get married and produce grandchildren. (I'm kidding. I don't know.)
19) How do your friends perceive you? What is wrong about their perception? What would your friends never say about your personality?
I'm not sure of what my answer is for this. I'll get back with you.
20) You got a whole day to do whatever you like. What kind of activities do you feel like doing?
Let's go eat food from some country whose food we've never tried before. You tell me about whatever's on your mind. I'll reciprocate and then probably talk about Myers-Briggs. We'll go see a movie. And so on.
