Just be careful that he does not kill you.
He knows this would result in, at the very least, his serious maiming. I am confident he won't kill me.
You should calm tone down, the solution to your problem is simple, the matter just requires a surpression of your angry nature. Appeal to his Fi, try to make him value time punctuality and make him respect your Te values, confront him about the effects of delay. It should give him a thinker. Just remember to remain calm and give a the attempt enough neutral ground.
OK. Alright. Fine. But do you think I haven't tried this? I've been with this guy for 5 years. I feel like I've tried *everything*. If I confront him about the effects of his lateness, even in an even tone of voice, he loses it. I mean, am I giving the impression that I am the emotionally volatile one in the relationship? I'm not. Yes, I get angry at times. But this guy - I have seriously never met someone who takes every damn thing as personally as my boyfriend. At times it is virtually impossible to discuss anything with him, regardless of tone, word choice, circumstances of the conversation etc. - he will often shut right down. What I most often hear is "you're attacking me and I'm not having it" - then he walks out of the room. And he will respond this way even if I do my very best to say something neutral like "I felt pretty hurt waiting in that cafe for you today for an hour and a half, I wish we could figure out some way to work this out and not have it turn into a fight."
I HATE fighting. And some part of me thinks he almost needs it - it seems like he just tries to ignore problems until they burst out in a big messy blast of yelling and recriminations. I can often predict when he's going to lose it because he hasn't lost it for awhile and I know it's got to be coming.
Sorry, this is an admitted sore spot. Just because I'm an ENTJ doesn't mean I spend my days screaming at him and beating him with kitchen implements. I try SO DAMNED HARD to be patient with him, and it is very painful for me sometimes to think that all my patience sometimes seems to have been for naught.
Ugh.