Am I a shy ENTP or a loud INTP???

[Lolo246_]

Hello Everyone!!! I'm new here hehehe, I'm in the middle of a type crisis , and came here to ask for help hehe, I'd be grateful if someone helps

1) Context:
a) What is your age range and general location (Country so that cultural values can be taken into account)? Do you have any impairments that may affect the way that you answer this questionnaire? Any religious or political beliefs (or anything else along those lines) that also might have an effect?

I'm a 15 yo Mexican, very young yeah, some of the threads here were posted before I was born hehehe, I think the way my country affects me is that I'm a bit more extroverted, Mexico is a let's go party and small talk country, I'm quite Introverted but I don't think that neither of them are a big problem hehe.

Also this is a very catholic country and I was raised with xSFJs so I sometimes follow traditions and rules, not that I agree with those beliefs but I behave traditionally, at least from the xNTP perspective.

In political or religious stuff I don't think there is a problem, well as I mentioned before I was raised in a very Catholic environment so a bit of its values were taught to me, but I decided to stop believing in that and my family was completely ok, I don't care about politics, neither does my family, we all agree that our country is shitty hahaha.

b) Which types are you currently considering? Why are you considering them and why haven’t you decided on one?

ENTP and INTP, I'm 60% sure that I'm ENTP so I'll write the reason I'm NOT one. The first and least valid one is that I'm quiet and shy with new people and sometimes my family, also, I'm probably an enneagram 5 with a 9 fix in the tritype, which is not common in ENTPs.

Now the real reasons hehe, I don't have clear which function I use as a dominant tho, I think my Ne is too weak for an ENTP, I certainly do random stuff but I don't quite interact with the external world that much or at least not recently, sometimes I do and it's pretty fun, but I like being in my house researching and doing nothing all day than to go to a party, an event or even do something outside, but I'll admit that whenever I feel stimulated I'm like I drank 3 litters of coke, which confuses me more because, it makes me way too excitable for an Introvert but too static for an extrovert, specially ENTP, I like being in a room just researching new information and concepts, or leisuring haha whatever feel like doing in the moment hahaha, but yeah, I like being in one place and don't quite engage with typical external stimuli.

I also think I'm not an ENTP because I was very selective and independent when I was younger, I wasn't Ne-ing(?) all the time, I mean I sure did use Ne but not really that much. Idk which function I was using when I was younger tho but, I used Fe, without a doubt, but not strongly, (possible ESFJ???? hahaha), I was pretty empathetic and followed social conventions and commitments with a passion, but I wasn't very extroverted and didn't have friends or at least, not many. Like 4-5 friends, everyone described me as "normal" not really special, very calm and investigative kid

Now, a reason why I think I'm an ENTP, as I said before I used Fe when I was younger, and having an inf function neatly developed that young contradicts the theory a lot, and also I have some serious problems with my Si, you may ask me something to do and I will try to do it and forget your petition even existed when I go to do it hahahaha, I have a BAD memory, I just remember things that I researched, well, it's complicated, my Si sucks, but my ENTJ friend Si sucks even more so it depends from which angle do you look it hahahaha, and despict being raised in a harmonious-conservative house I still managed to have some sort of level of reluctance with authority, not because I hate authority itself, but when it imposes orders on me without explaining the reason of why should I do it, it caused problems and I'm seen in my family as arrogant because I counter with facts and logic their nonsense orders hahaha (it smells like disrispect hahaha).

Nowdays my Ne is kinda good but it needs development, my most developed functions are actually Ti and Fe. Si is... well, there, existing hahahahaha


2) What do you deem as your purpose in life?

To obtain as much knowledge as possible, without settling down in one area for too long, whether it's science, philosophy, art, economics, EVERYTHING. Well, I know my limitations, and when I enter adulthood it's not going to as easy, sometimes knowledge costs... and a lot. I also want to make everyone I have encountered happy and Inspire them to be better, like those times when people say, I'm not the same since I met you, oooh my god, das good. hahahahahaha.

3) Of the seven deadly sins, which one(s) do you relate to the most and the least and why?

The most one I relate is Sloth, moving or doing something is HARD, I'm also disinterested in things in a sometimes unhealthy way, like, if you aren't interesting why should I even interact with you?, hahahaa that never happened tho (I felt bad writing it, it is very mean hahaha ), it's usually with responsabilities, Why should do this if it doesn't benefit me? hahahaha

The one I relate the least is Wrath: It's usually veeeery hard to make me angry, to annoy me maybe, but to make me angry ooh boi I assure you that that will never happen hahaha. But yeah, I forgive people waaay to easiliy and I'm actually afraid that people with take advantage of that hehe.

4) Analyzing your relationships with others, briefly describe:
a) The type of people you are drawn to
Oh boy, I could write a lot about this but I'll keep it simple haha, I usually like Smart and Philosophical people, people that I could talk about concepts and theories for Hours, I also like mentally stable people but usually the thing I mentioned first with the second don't come along , so basically, people with interesting ideas (and emotions ) that will make me learn something new . Wow, I simplified something yay hahaha, well it's not hard but I thought it would take me longer XD

b) The type of people who are drawn to you
Idk man, if someone is that stupid to do that I'll straight-up marry that person haahhahahaha jkjk. Well yeah, very few people were drawn to me, the only thing that they had in common was that all of them were Fi users and shared my interests, maybe I was too oblivious and didin't notice someone was into me hahaha

Error sample too small. hahaha

c) The type of people you are repulsed by
Never thought of this before, I try to get along with everyone, but I guess I would hate, Manipulative people, People that don't distinguish real life and fiction, Close-minded people , People who only talk about rules and work, Argumentative people, Simple and intellectual-repulsed people (I mean I also like to do common stuff but at least try to connect with me), Arrogant and Pedantic people, well, I'm imagining which people I would dislike but with the exception of Close-minded and Intellectual-Repulsed people I think I would still try to get along


5)What are the traits in others that you admire but you cannot emulate yourself? Elaborate.
Discipline, that's why I have an ENTJ friend, I like when people are ambitious and disciplined to achieve their objectives, I admire it a lot, I'm working on my Si so that I'll have that trait sooner than later, I also admire people who can handle social situations, I wish I could do that, give me your strength aaaaa hahahaha

6) Describe your relationship with the following:
a) Anger: Only present with small things, usually in form of frustation and irritation but that's really it, people hold grudges, I had never, not even once, some people also yell at stuff or people and I don't understand why, whyy???

b) Shame: If we take shame of exposition, I have it a lot, I don't like showing off things nor do extremely wierd stuff... to some extent, my Ne surely does strange things but at least those things are fun, I mean like, unironcally dressing wierd, heavily presonalize things like cars, or just plain loosing dignity for attention. Nop. I'll pass

If we take it as a shame of being myself, I've never been prouder of being me, I'm a human and that by itself is something to be proud of. Philosophycal stuff y'know hahaha.

c) Fear: I fear judgement with a passion, well hahaha, it's unconscious, but I've realized that I sometimes don't expose myself because I don't wanna be judged.
I also fear homework hahahahaha

d) Love/passion: Writing, I do a lot of things but there isn't something I enjoy as creating stories, that is something in my mind rent-free 24/7, everything else are just hobbies.

e) Conflict: Inexistent, rarely have it, due to my tendency to escape from it and no one involving me in anything, I usually make someone else solve important things, or at least this happens with external conflict.

I've a lot of conflicts with myself, but I don't run away from those and don't let anyone know, I face internal problems with forcefulness and determination, there isn't someone to help me, I only need myself for that (unless I can't solve it by my own).

7) What are some of the themes that have played a prominent role in your life (ie. A struggle you’ve been unable to conquer, ect)?

This is a tough one... umm, I guess my insensitivity and disinterest, I lack interest of things in a general manner, whether those are things or people, nothing seems to "click" to me, but idk, this is not really a big issue and know how to cope with "not feeling", so meh, nothing is really a issue... for now.

8) Answer only one of the following:

[Under college aged] What do you plan on studying/working as in the future? How did you go about deciding this? If this is not your ideal area of pursuit, what would be?

Engineering; has math, which I love, and gives money, what else would I want, it's a hard career but life ain't easy, even if I choose a "Easy" career, life's gonna beat my ass, so I gotta choose a career that safely puts food in the table. It's not my ideal career tho, if Writing was an actually stable form of earning money I would choose that.

9) When meeting a new person, what do you tend to focus on?

Their Intelligence and Ideas, also mental health, If a person has not dangerous ideas, is not stupid, and mentally stable, that person is in my whitelist.
This is what I search when searching for a friend actually.

If I'm searching for a intimate relationship I'd want the same but with the same interests as an Extra, I find it hard when people have very different activites, it doesn't need to be 100% similar, but at least I need something in common

10) How do you feel about humanity as a whole? What do you feel are some of the biggest problems the human race faces and why?

I love humanity as a whole, its mere existence is beautiful and I admire how complex and unique humanity is. The most alarming thing is our own extintion, I guess, other problems are secondary, in order to solve other things we first need to be alive hahaha

11) What are some of your hobbies and interests?

Watching anime, reading books, writing, typology hahaha, etc. Idk everything can be a hobby hahaha

13) How do you usually “hang out” with your friend(s)? When answering, think about what activities you tend to choose, whether you hang out with one person at once or many, whether or not you initiate the interaction.

Pandemic moment, well, my ENTJ friend and I do hang-out sometimes, I go to his house, go to the cinema, idk the activity doesn't mather, it's rahter going with him the most fun, specially teasing him hahaahha, he gets fired up real fast ahhaha

14) What is more important, actions or words? Why?

Words, Not because words are better but because I will not demand something I don't succesfully provide hahaha, I'm not bad with words, I've seen people grateful of what I've said so yeah

But if I were capable of both, I would go to both, both are important

15) Oh dear, you’ve been cursed by a witch! It’s ok though, you get a choice on which curse you will receive. Will you choose….
b) To be immortal

This is actually a gift hahaha, thx witch.

I mean, there would be a point where I would give up on life, but the fact I have unlimited time to explore and research as I want would make me very excited ahahhaha, I mean, Endless possibilities, with endless time. Wonderful. hehehehehe I giggled out of writing this hehehe


16) What do you hope to avoid being? If it helps, describe a person who embodies what you avoid/you as a villain, ect.

I avoid being an asshole, I would hate being someone that does not aknowledge other people's feelings (I'm not refering to telekinesis or emotional mind reading(?) hahaha, I mean being an ass) because that sucks, I like when people feel (healthily), I base of everything that is wrong to not be that way, I am constantly exposing to disgusting behaviors so I learn to not to be like those people.

Any villain is bad.

17) How do you relate to obsession? Do you tend to "merge" with others or your interests? How do you feel about the idea of doing this?

Well, typology is an obsession, and I completely merge to it, there isn't a day that I'm not researching or talking with the community, It occupies everything in my mind hahaha. It also allowed me accept people, I would befriend with a xSxJ that only talks about rules and is close-minded if that person likes this, there are limits obviously, but that's the power of having the same interests I guess.

It makes me less productive because it requires to focus all of my resources to that and it kinda worries me, it isn't that bad, but I could be doing more important stuff.

18) Organized or messy? Plans and blueprints or impulse and surprises? What are you preferences and tendencies?

MESSY, I've tried to be organized and my parents taught me how to be, but I still prefer to go randomly with goals, I actually like teachers because they have knowledge and they also organized it to be learned for me ehehehehe thx. I mean I CAN be organized but I feel bad being like a Box of schedules and appointments, eww no byee. hehehehehe

I love surprises, they are always welcomed.
19) How do you subjectively view comfort and how do you create comfort in your life and surroundings?

Oh... I've not actually thought of this before, I just vibe y'know, I guess with just stopping doing responsabilities I feel conformtable, anything can be conformtable as long as is not imposed hehe, Just existing with no worries is good and my prefered way to relax, I don't do anything to my surrounding. That's the point


Sorry for the amount of text and bad grammar hahahaha