htb
New member
- Joined
- May 14, 2007
- Messages
- 1,505
- MBTI Type
- INTJ
- Enneagram
- 1w9
That worked well for me -- simple, pleasant.Admittedly I haven't tried the Skype + webcam combination yet.
That worked well for me -- simple, pleasant.Admittedly I haven't tried the Skype + webcam combination yet.
I think it comes down to a T issue more than specifically an INTP issue. In my experience, Fs like to have long conversations on the phone, while Ts use the phone for very brief, specific purposes. When my ENFP sister or ESFP SO calls me, I find myself thinking, "What is the purpose of this call? Is there something specific they called to tell me?" My attention wanders and my patience dwindles the longer I'm on the phone. Don't get me wrong - I love long discussions - it's just that I would much rather do them in person. This also applies to every T in my life I can think of.
A suggestion: You might try text messaging. Most Ts I know, including myself, will respond much more quickly to a brief text. If you save the long conversations for when you see them in person you'll get much more out of them.
I do have a lot of T qualities and this may be one of them, but I do consider myself mostly INF, and I dislike most phone conversations. For me tho, its not to do with the phone being the issue but the conversation topics being the issue. I simply find the things most people want to talk about on the phone to be either boring or quickly resolved. The other issue with the phone, is that I feel like its a leash preventing me from doing much of anythgin else while I'm talking on it (I simply find it difficult to relax when I'm speaking on the phone (I'm still one of those folks in the technology dark ages with no cell phone - I've cosnidered gettign one, but have a hard time justifying the costs vs how little I'd use it and the pre-paid plans have their own drawbacks.)). When I talk to someone, I want it to either be about a shared interest that has a lot of room for speculation or some other abstract idea that has a lot of good branching room for interesting tangents and my prefered conversation environment is anywhere that I can lean back and relax in a comfortable chair/couch and sip on some coffee or tea while I chat (genealy either somoenes living room or a less crowded coffee shop). In general I prefer conversations in person followed by e-mail or message board conversations, then phone and in last place is Instant Messaging. To me, the only redeemign quality of a phone conversation is getting to hear someones voice and if its someone thats not long-distance thats not a big deal, and for long distance, a mix of phone/e-mail maybe somethign like 20%/80% is prefered.
That's interesting. When I get on the phone, I don't want to be doing anything but sitting there on my brown chair and talking. I talk on the phone like I would talking to someone in person. I want the other person on the other end to know that they have my undivided attention.
My sister (ISFJ, I think) does her housework while she is on the phone, so she gets distracted (which is distracting to me).
It's usually better for me face to face. For one thing if I'm talking face to face with someone then usually that person has interested me enough for me to be around them, so I'm interested fro the get go. Also, should their conversation fail to harness my interest, I can always study them whilst they talk, noting their mannerisms and studying them from a psychological and detached point of view.What I don't understand is why everyone else is so comfortable face-to-face. I mean, I feel a lot safer on the phone, and kind of vulnerable in a face-to-face conversation. I'm constantly worrying about how I look, or what I'm doing with my hands, whether my facial expressions are appropriate, etc. So I feel better on either the Internet or the phone.
I usually come across well enough face-to-face, but I tend to be drained faster by it, because I feel like I have to focus on controlling more nuances of what I'm doing to avoid giving a bad impression.
I wonder if part of this is that it's harder for INTP's to express their emotions verbally, and tend to think visually, or in a right-brained way?
What about dealing with strangers on the phone?
I fucking hate the phone. The phone can fuck off.
more than 15 minutes drains him.
Being on the phone for more than 10 minutes is like having your face being sucked into a black hole. I'm not sure why I don't like it, exactly. I don't get uncomfortable, but I do get bored, and I start to feel like I'm tied down.