Sounds like you are well on your way to working out your moral reasoning to me.
Also, to me, "moral values" are quite a broad thing. It's like what [MENTION=15003]Vilku[/MENTION] said - a moral "to be good", but how is that interpreted? Sometimes I think it is much harder to define the
how than the
what. Is it harder for you to determine how you want to be, or how you should act?
Honestly, I think part of it is trial-and-error. If you behave one way in a situation, then you regret it, you change your way of approaching things and try again. In high school, I lied all the time, because I thought it was a harmless way out. Which, in certain situations, it still seems to be, but I caught myself up in a web of lies, so to speak, and really messed myself up, and hurt several people close to me. So after that I rethought things and personally avoid lying, in part because it makes my life easier. I don't have to remember the lies!
"Is it harder for you to determine how you want to be, or how you should act?"
neither, determine the optimal method of perception, where your ability to perceive is not static, but rather one where you always have motivation to summon more will to see everything, and keep maintaining it neutral of bias with said motivation.
those two questions are answered by this simple method of perceptive self development. also assess same method for self understanding, and enjoy the challenge of it. for one can never truly perceive perfectly. as such, we must enjoy the striving of perfection, understanding it itself is perfection if we can accept the never ending quality of our goal. combining this neutral perception with your knowledge is very helpful, as they are both sides of the same coin.
in shorter words, neutral motivation for self understanding (which makes understanding everything clearer) to rid yourself of every egoistic motivations you can find, to be whole. it might seem selfish, but knowing such would destroy the perception of selfishness and selflessness as they become one in the end.
ive achieved it a few times, only maintaining such state is hard. but every time i reach there, more i will be for the rest of my life and easier reaching such becomes.
it also correlates to enneagram in an interesting way: body, mind and feeling triad. such state i described, is when you arent led by one ennea (sure you might have core), but rather, one of each triad is equally motivating you, and thus giving you the ability to balance each with the help of each motivational factors for the balance which gives you perfect progress.
i realized if i dont focus on all three, the two rest i do focus on arent really making any progress, rather creating me an illusion of progress. like when i were neglecting my body triad, focusing on 4w3 and 7?, i thought i made amazing progress by creating new voice every week for myself, gaining outstanding voice acting skills.. but really, i were in a loop of deluding myself into believing in progress, when in fact i was only running circles with no other permanent gain than the skill. (and that loop in the end made me forgot pretty much everything as only voice acting/having fun by doing so mattered to me, not to mention how fast time passed.)
they old timer self developers always told of focusing on those three, and i prejudiced their findings as possibly faulty due the absence of scientific methods.
and as such, ignored them. only to stumble upon it accidentally myself, and find out they were right. and the "body" doesnt actually mean body, rather the act of controlling it with and your brains.
more on the first question: i suppose the problem for ENP's is overcomplicating everything and forgetting Si holds the final solution. complicating everything for the sake of gaining more is good, but in the end the real conclusion can be made from searching the roots of question in need of an answer.
we tend to inteprate the original question for what we think it is, while in fact one may ask what religion is, and to find the real answer you must look deep inside your mind. ignoring the words, only looking at the core of the concept, does it even exist or is this just a label for communicational purposes? for example, that i would have answered with: the act of sharing world view and/or knowledge for achieving something.
there are no shoulds, there are course of actions, and one option is always better than the rest. whether we see this option, understand it, or even come up with it in the first place.
the way i view world: it would unfold the exact same path without my intervention, and people would arrive into the exact same emotional/mental states were i not to intervene. therefore, from my perspective i have as much control over it as well as i understand my own abilities to interact with this world.
that being said, some things happen, while i can control most of it as long as i understand how to, but there are always some things which would have been beyond even if i were to have perfect undrstanding.
like when i go outside, i acknowledge some people have been set to the path of aggression at specific times and i play by chances on not coming across them, as well as i can fight against the unknowns which i can control by analyzing chances, while they are anyways set in stone even if the chance is the most rare.
OMM... i dont sound 7w6 six at all? xD... taking mental capabilities for self preservation. its akin to a game of chess, only you have no idea of the opponents pieces nor their locations, while you can create accurate estimations by figuring your own pieces first. i think that parable about sums it up. parables <3.. xD... cant help but love them, always make my long explanations ten times simpler, as well as translate my sarcasm into a language others understand in times of need.
and while each option you can act with, the best ones, are always hardest to find.. they are there, just depends on your ability to understand yourself what those options are.
"Honestly, I think part of it is trial-and-error. If you behave one way in a situation, then you regret it, you change your way of approaching things and try again."
when i look into mistakes i made, i trace my past delf understanding to see if the mistake was even preventable with my abilities in the first place. if it was, then good, ive learned how to prevent similar things in the future. if not, then no mistake was made, it was inevitable. although, often if not always all mistakes are preventable with adequate self understanding.
i have over 250+ tabs open, i calculated an estimation. with self understanding, no matter how interesting EVER. ONE. of them. is MY PRECIOUSS!! >=(... well, i learned to predict the likelihood of myself into even stumbling onto that "interesting" tab i opened a year or minutes ago, to actually know i wouldnt stumble upon some of them no matter how precious they are to me. so as to close them.
self understanding is the key to everything for ENP's.
only by understanding myself i can predict myself so as to control the said self.
also for enfp's important to remember, look at hunting for mistakes as a way to bettering yourself, not to condemn yourself.
the betetr you get at it, the broader and more neutral your scope becomes, and as such meaning higher amount of chances of discovering how to better yourself.
yes, contradicting truth is self destructive. there are always better paths available. such as distracting the others from what you dont want them to see, or eluding it by over powering them verbally.
but, its always easiest not to create something you have to elude by eluding the necessity for deceithful means of communication.
i cope against that best by being 100% open and truthful, its a lesson to learn how everything you are can be expressed in a positive light as long as you poses the linguistic capabilities. after all, enfp's are the creators of languages. what we created, we can master, and what we master, is our slaves.
one could learn rhetorics in academic ways, but for Ne users i recommend self learning. not only to be unique, cause then you learn the core method of how to manipulate language, but as well making you unique and verbally more expressive as well as clear. you dont need fancy rules to study a language, all you need is a subject to experiment upon.
one funny observation ive made: i could say any detail i view as positive in ways which'd make the other think of it in a negative light, but then i could also express it in positive light as long as prejudices arent present, and then, its easy to accuse others of such if they really do so. as there is no avoiding the truth.
interestingly, i turned a homophobic person into.. actually defending them in ou conversations without ever making myself into one side or another, although i expressed myself on neutral leaning giving the necessary knowledge he needed to make a positive conclusion even although the knowledge was given in said neutral/negative tone so as to not distance myself from the prejudiced negative conclusion which was always demonstrated.
its interesting, how much good can be done with language alone without ever even letting the other know how you made them reach their conclusions in the first place.
and i actually do use lies too, but only as one time use tools with people i will never know, and actually only just the one time in that said shopping event i mentioned. plus for me to breach into such a conclusion of using it, there must be a deep reason for me to do so as i had in that situation.
if you use lies, make yourself believe them. that way, they become the reality, as well you must use only ones of situations you would anyways forget so no remembering needed, and no permanent impact of any sort affect you which to worry after.
if you can convince yourself, you will act the way you naturally would so its more of an erased + replaced memory than a lie. and how on earth can anyone detect a lie if you yourself are convinced of its truth?
i explode into laughing if i attempt to fake without convincing myself first, and thats not very convincing eh? xD..
the only negative aspect on lies is pretty much, the violation of trust where such is formed. if a costumer trusts salesman, sells an overpriced object, customer finds out later, feels betrayed, never purchases from said market line again. thats how i act at least. (a person who orders one pound worthy products from china.. yeah, its worth a one months wait now that i finalyl got it today, i can play with my synthesizer which i did play with just fef hours ago. or.. five hours, time runs fast..)
each person have different view on what trust is, and where they place it, is always on their terms. better not violate without rational explanation.
on SJ's they can have frustrating expectations of you doing everything their way, for example if i plan to plan, its set in stone and means everything is in control, but they feel betrayed cause such a plan wouldnt work for them, logical fallacy of expecting others to be themselves. fortunately, we poses the tools for explaining their mistakes on their face. that too is something you could either do in way which they perceive as a personal attack, or gently with controlled words. however, if their aggression on you comes as a surprise, explanations hard to form under the emotional pressure. theres one mistake i learned from, SJ's = unpredictable, expect unpredictable explosions and form plans on how to evade those. if unpredictable happens, unpredicted forces emotional forces imbound may affect you and defensive stance doesnt play well for sj's, as they hate our elusive tactics, aggrevating them further. if they make conclusion, only way to affect it is by changing their perception of what gave the conclusion. by pointing out errors.
the difference of the NP's and SJ's planning is quite small: knowledge of possibilities for course of actions to be sustained is enough to convince adequate plans will come in as we go for NP's, for SJ's, they require not only the knowledge of the possibilities being there but also, each step in high detail how to reach them.
should i consider on learning how to stop my thought stream? gah, i can _never_ see my posts as complete. always something is missing, which without it would be incomplete.. -.- .. the perfectionists burden, doing more than what is necessary.
incomplete as in the other person not posessing every piece of knowledge required for the said conclusions im presenting, to be made.
and, ive only got so used when not explaining everything, people make irrational opposition only to be crushed if i dont, in the end, anyways have to explain every single thing which by explaining in the first place would have saved some time.
(hm, thats an effective way to humiliate Ti's btw. they come with believing their conclusion is adequate, but in the fact.. made on very limited knowledge of the situation, giving the illusion of their knowledge being superior. oh, and they probably hate us for doing it. i really find it hard making a thought sharing bond with sensor Ti's, i may give them something to think about which they find interesting, only to receive a beep of an irrational conclusion i must fix by flooding them with adequate information for them to see why it is how it is. you know the people who stick to ridiculous things if you dont explain in detail how easy it is to switch for a better method? its not enough if something else is multitude easier and better in every way.)
also how you interpret morality is simple: form a core moral which cna be applied to everything by studying how you can use it with the aid of neutral understanding, knowledge holes replaced with chance calculations.