[MBTI General] SP-SJ Romantic Match

[Cimarron]

Keirsey recommends this one. Do you think he's on to something? Would you dare to try an SP-SJ relationship? How tough or easy would it be in the long term?

 

[Wild horses]

HEY CIMMY!!!! SOOOOOOOO found yourself a cute SP! Good stuff... I know of an ESTJ and ESTP that work quite well together... although they do argue a little bit about responsibility etc it's mainly surface stuff and at their core they seem to get on very well and have many shared values GO FOR IT!!

 

[Nonsensical]

You can find romance in any type. Type actually doesn't mean a thing in regards to finding that special someone.

But as far as types go, sure. The SP/SJ would be a perfect balance, IMO, and you would have an equalization of Sensing. It would be a little more difficult to have a relationship between an N and an S because they communicate differently.

 

[Halla74]

HEY CIMMY!!!! SOOOOOOOO found yourself a cute SP! Good stuff... I know of an ESTJ and ESTP that work quite well together... although they do argue a little bit about responsibility etc it's mainly surface stuff and at their core they seem to get on very well and have many shared values GO FOR IT!!

Yes. ESTP + ESTJ = easy communication. Sometimes lots and lots of laughter, and other times peaceful silence. These two understand each other, no doubt.

 

[Cimarron]

HEY CIMMY!!!! SOOOOOOOO found yourself a cute SP! Good stuff... I know of an ESTJ and ESTP that work quite well together... although they do argue a little bit about responsibility etc it's mainly surface stuff and at their core they seem to get on very well and have many shared values GO FOR IT!!

No no, this is all hypothetical, really. I see the books talking about it, and I know sometimes SPs and SJs have difficulty getting along, so I'm looking for other people's thoughts and experiences.

You can find romance in any type. Type actually doesn't mean a thing in regards to finding that special someone.

Well, I agree. That is the caution we'll use here.

 

[Giggly]

Sharing the S is heavenly it makes things so much easier. But I think it's even better if you're both balanced J/P. If you're a strong J then you run the risk of crouching on the Ps open-mindedness. And if you're a strong P then you run the risk of crouching on the Js need for decisiveness. That's not to say that a strong J and a strong P can't work but I think that they'd both have to be bit more willing to compromise or meet in the middle to satisfy each others needs.

 

[SolitaryPenguin]

My ISFJ is the best damn thing that ever happened to me, aside from that time that I got to meet Captain Kangaroo.

Man I miss that guy.

 

[wolfy]

SP and SJ is great. Keirsey got the positives and the problems right too.

 

[Halla74]

Sharing the S is heavenly it makes things so much easier.

Yesss! Sister Giggly speaks the truth on this!

But I think it's even better if you're both balanced J/P. If you're a strong J then you run the risk of crouching on the Ps open-mindedness. And if you're a strong P then you run the risk of crouching on the Js need for decisiveness. That's not to say that a strong J and a strong P can't work but I think that they'd both have to be bit more willing to compromise or meet in the middle to satisfy each others needs.

In the case of ESTP + ESTJ, the P/J difference is much less of an issue than the BENEFIT of having "S" in common. As long as both parties like and repsect each other, then the P/J thing will work out, and is often the fuel of much humor.

 

[Quinlan]

I think SPs might sometimes have a problem with "SJs" but one SJ is usually just right!

 

[Domino]

SJs and SPs together are a natural fit indeed! Good fortune to you, Mr. Cim!

 

[Unique]

SJ?

Let me be the first to say no thanks

 

[KarenParker]

SP and SJ is great. Keirsey got the positives and the problems right too.

Is this a book you're talking about? Or a website? I want to read.

 

[Speed Gavroche]

SJ?

Let me be the first to say no thanks

I follow your way I'm rarely excited by SJs company and definitely, I don't like Keirsey. He tells that SJs ans SPs are the best match because they share S, but SJs share Si and SPs share Se, that's very different. I can't stand Si, it's so boring, and so, I can't stand SJs, they're so boring.

But in the way to nuance my opinion, I'll summarize my relationships with differents SJ types.

ISTJ: Tend to criticize me for any detail, I accept it and respond sometimes by other critics. I have very nice relationships with many of them, I often find many qualities with them and find them strong, but our relationships are sometimes colds and confrontationals too, with mutual respect and understanding though.

ESTJ: I've a few of good ESTJs pal, but I generally find them hardly too conformist and aggresive. They're boring and I avoid them, I often finish by tell them "leave me alone, sucker" or "gett off my way".

ISFJ: The most boring of all the type so far. When ISTJs criticise me for any detail, ISFJs whimp and arise as a my victim for any detail, especially males ISFJs, we hav'nt any affinity at all. Actually, this is a very good type for women, and females ISFJs are generally kind and cute and I get along well with her, even if they're not very exiting company. But male ISFJs are unsuportable.

ESFJ: I usually get along very good with them because they're kind and warm, some of my best friends are ESFJ, they're sometimes vey exciting company. The problem is that they always have a strong maternalistic side (even with males) which make them very warms, but for that reason, it's very difficult for me to conceive a dating with an ESFJ female. My females ESFJ friends act in some sort like a mother for me and the others are so maternalistic that they would probably act in the same way.

So my relationships with:

ESFJs (friendship): very good
ISTJs: good
Females ISFJs: quite good
ESFJs dating: not very good
ESTJs: not good
Males ISFJs: Aaaaaargh!!

Actually, I've good relationships with some SJ types and not good with some others...like the other temperament! I'm not convinced by the Keirsey's theory at all.

 

[Cimarron]

Oh that's right, I forgot that Wolfy ran away with an SJ lady.

Is this a book you're talking about? Or a website? I want to read.

David Keirsey wrote the Please Understand Me book series. They're still available in bookstores or wherever. He put together the temperament theory.

Also, because there are so many SJs, there's bound to be a lot of variation, I suppose. Good input so far, people.

 

[NovemberLou]

I am married to an ESFJ, and we have a great realationship. Our biggest differences really have come from T/F rather than J/P, where I think we compliment each other really well. Sometimes my impulsiveness and disorganization make him a little crazy, but he has gotten used to it. His need to organize and make lists doesn't bother me, though sometimes he wants to do it when we I don't think we need to. He has become a bit more flexible over time (and I am a bit more organized). I will tell you one thing, though, it is much easier to find something or look up someone's phone number now, than when I was single.

 

[wolfy]

Is this a book you're talking about? Or a website? I want to read.

Here, Personality zone Love zone. There are more articles in the menu to the right

 

[Jeffster]

Yeah, I've always fallen for the NF girls. It's pretty obvious that an SJ would work better with me for a long term relationship. The problem is they don't seem to notice me ever. Or if they do, they never say anything.

 

[Max]

I'm not sure on romance, but I know that I have had good friendships with these types. I have gotten along well with ISTPs, and especially well with ESTPs. In terms of the person I know whose personality I was most attracted to, she was most likely either an ESTP or ESFP, or possibly an introvert, though that's a bit less likely. I wouldn't be surprised if this worked out well.

Though I often don't understand the P-type desires to wait until the last minute and be indecisive, there is just a natural connection that can make them fun to be with.

 

[Unique]

I'm attracted to people who at least have some unconventional traits, either N or P or both, some SJs make good friends but thats about it