Help me escape this shitty career and better my life

[Peter Deadpan]

It's no secret that I dislike my job as a dog groomer. It's been 12 long years and the stress of it never gets easier. It's physically demanding, and I don't think I can tolerate more than a couple more years. Emotionally, I am spent. I just really need to reduce stress in my life, and getting a new job seems the easiest change.

Easy is subjective though. I have no marketable experience simply because of the fact that I have been doing this for so long. I also have no degree. I do have a 4.0, but no one is going to give a fuck if I didn't even graduate. I am in the middle of applying for a new job, one that involves providing support for those living with HIV/AIDS. It is entry level, but given the competitive nature of the market, I really have no "edge" to speak of.

Does anyone have any tips on sculpting an eye-catching cover letter when the applicant lacks direct experience? I read a few articles for pointers, but perhaps someone here is involved in hiring, or perhaps someone has had success in making such a career change.

It's either that, or it's time to sell a kidney

prostitute myself.

.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

Nevermind. It's a limited term employment opportunity.

Sigh. (code for cry)

 

[Tiger Owl]

Look up some good guides for writing a resume (as apposed to a CV). A resume will capitalize on your strengths, energy, drive, and personality, where a CV focuses on experience and accomplishments. Sell your strengths, and being dedicated to one job for 12 years is a strength, as is maintaining good grades. They show you are smart, driven and capable, show them you are trainable, mature and not lazy and you will stand above the crowd of applicants. The worst thing an employer can say is no. Good luck in your search!

 

[SurrealisticSlumbers]

First off, I greatly enjoy reading your posts on here, Peter.

I also can relate to doing a remedial job for a while and feeling "stuck."

I don't have experience in hiring, so I'm not sure that any advice I could give would be of much help as I'm ... sorta in the same boat. What I can tell you is that there are ways that one could parlay their job experience and references acquired thru working at that position for so long into something else.

Have you looked into receptionist jobs at places like veterinary clinics or any business involving animals? Doubt specialized training would be needed if you worked an entry-level receptionist or filing job at one such office, using your experience in the field of animal care to your advantage. You are accustomed to being around animals, and I assume, are an "animal person."

I've vaguely heard of pet massage therapy being a somewhat steady career, where one can be their own boss; set their own hours. You'd have to market yourself, but I think self-employment is possible with a job such as that. And, I doubt that there are any lofty credentials needed - if anything, you'd go through training to become certified and get a license of some sort... not sure what that'd cost. But, it isn't that different from what you're currently doing - you'd still get to be around animals but I'd imagine it's a much more relaxed setting, with some autonomy, in which a caring person who loves animals would flourish.

I do not recommend going on websites such as Indeed.com because they are filled with scams and jobs where they want you to have 5+ years of experience in an extremely obscure field and two Master's degrees... Also, avoid Craigslist like the plague!!!

P.S. A website I recommend for crafting a professional-looking and well-designed resume is Canva.com. It's free to use, and I feel like it gives one that extra "edge."

P.S.S. You could still put on your resume that you attended that college from 20xx - 20xx and specify what your area of study was and what your cumulative GPA was. You just can't put "Bachelor of x" ... I'd think an employer would still be impressed that you did achieve such excellent grades while in school, even if you did not officially graduate.

 

[Coriolis]

It's no secret that I dislike my job as a dog groomer. It's been 12 long years and the stress of it never gets easier. It's physically demanding, and I don't think I can tolerate more than a couple more years. Emotionally, I am spent. I just really need to reduce stress in my life, and getting a new job seems the easiest change.

Easy is subjective though. I have no marketable experience simply because of the fact that I have been doing this for so long. I also have no degree. I do have a 4.0, but no one is going to give a fuck if I didn't even graduate. I am in the middle of applying for a new job, one that involves providing support for those living with HIV/AIDS. It is entry level, but given the competitive nature of the market, I really have no "edge" to speak of.

Does anyone have any tips on sculpting an eye-catching cover letter when the applicant lacks direct experience? I read a few articles for pointers, but perhaps someone here is involved in hiring, or perhaps someone has had success in making such a career change.

It's either that, or it's time to sell a kidney

prostitute myself.

.

What sort of work would you be interested in? The cover letter should suit the job, and the resume might need tailoring for it as well. Just off the cuff, I would start by looking at the big picture of what you do, which might include: interacting with customers, handling animals, dealing with chemicals, following and implementing safety regulations, etc. If you do other jobs around the grooming shop like bookkeeping, ordering supplies, advertising/marketing, etc., include those, too.

Have you had any luck networking? I'm told that is the best way to find a new job. You learn about opportunities before they even become public - sometimes before the manager even knows they should hire someone.

 

[FemMecha]

It can help to start articulating the ideal job and then negotiate it back to concrete options. Also, you mentioned having a 4.0 on your college credits. Could you transfer them into a local community college (tuition is usually cheapest) and put together an associates degree in a relatively short period of time?

I see some advantage career-wise to start with an inexpensive associates degree, so that you can get a job in an area related to your ideal career, and then go onto a bachelor's degree if you want while working in the field. Many professional jobs list a degree and two years of experience in their posting, and the plan I outlined is one of the few ways to achieve that. No one ever told me that, though.

For shorter term plans, it also helps to define what sort of environment you would like to work in. Is office-related work an option for you? or do you want something more hands-on?

 

[Peter Deadpan]

Thanks for all the advice everyone.

There are a lot of complications that make it difficult for me to settle on a plan of action.

I'm a single mom of two without your average support system. I have no one who can assist with childcare. School is virtually out of the picture for that reason, combined with the fact that degrees are costly and less valuable these days. The market is saturated and competitive. The market where I live is not great; the population here in the two main cities is less than 70,000. If I were to leave my job now, I would be limited to entry level positions which pay no more than $10/hour. There are a few jobs that pay $12/hour, but they are mostly call center jobs. A few years ago, I was diagnosed with Ankylosing Spondylitis, and because of that I cannot sit for 8 hours a day. I would quickly end up in excruciating pain. So, call center jobs are out. There are a couple very good hospitals here, but I am certain one will not hire me because I have tried several times (they do a credit check and I had a difficult time paying medical bills for awhile, so I'm sure that is a major reason they aren't considering me). The other hospital is an option, but again, we are looking at jobs that pay perhaps $10-12/hour.

I cannot live on $12/hour. My current job affords me the luxury of freedom of schedule and pay that cannot be matched without a degree. I have considered opening my own grooming salon, but I just do not think I can handle the stress of such an endeavor at this point in time.

I also lack basic MS Office knowledge, which could be remedied by taking some courses, but again... then I am sitting for 8 hours a day (as a receptionist).

I feel trapped. I feel like I fucked up and there is no fixing it now. I know that is negative, but it's actually pretty realistic too.

I am so desperate that I am currently considering housekeeping at a boutique hotel, but the pay is probably shit so that is sadly also a pipe dream. Emphasis on the "sadly."

 

[Typh0n]

You didn't fuck up. You tried something, and it didn't work out for you. But that's what everyone does: there's no way of knowing if you will enjoy a line of work or not. You just have to go for it. You went for it.

I find it helps to boil it down to what you really want to do, what you are passionate about, and then try to balance it out with the economic realities (which in your case don't look very good tbh, and this is no fault of yours). I understand you have two children, so responsibility is there and you aeren't as free as you could be if you had no kids.

What is it you want to do? If Typh0n had a magic wand, (which he doesn't) and could make it so that anything is possible, what would you like to do? It helps to know what you want, and to balance it out with what is possible, since your problem is that you dislike what you do, shouldn't the solution first be looking at what you do like? What do you want to do, forget about the economic/money making aspect of it first, or if it's not attainable without a degree, don't think of the "how can I do this" first think of the "what I want".

Sorry if this is useless btw, I am just trying to help, using advice that was given to me in similar situations.

 

[highlander]

I don't think people read cover letters. I have hired hundreds of people and can't recall ever seeing one. The recruiters strip that out before things get to me. The point about having a good resume is key and I like what [MENTION=34311]Tiger Owl[/MENTION] said related to that. The thing is to get into a career where you are using your natural talents and are able to spend some percentage of your day (even if it's only 20%) doing things that energize you.

What do you feel are the natural talents that you possess which have had the greatest impact on your success in life so far? What do you love doing?

 

[Abcdenfp]

Feeling stagnant is really truly a subtle form of torture , I can say for myself after 10 years of sitting at a desk I wanted to shoot myself, and I couldn't see any other path, it just looked like a long repetitive line of this is my life.. wtf and then because I really couldn't see any way out I started very small , I started with this book
Morning Pages | Julia Cameron Live
and I know it's going to seem like bullshit but you've really have to start somewhere and this provided for me a canvas to Build out what I wanted my life to look like and if you and I had the time and some tea I would show you what two years later my life became .. build it and they will come . Dream it and I promise it is possible. Write about it for a year and you will have the blue print

 

[Peter Deadpan]

Feeling stagnant is really truly a subtle form of torture , I can say for myself after 10 years of sitting at a desk I wanted to shoot myself, and I couldn't see any other path, it just looked like a long repetitive line of this is my life.. wtf and then because I really couldn't see any way out I started very small , I started with this book
Morning Pages | Julia Cameron Live
and I know it's going to seem like bullshit but you've really have to start somewhere and this provided for me a canvas to Build out what I wanted my life to look like and if you and I had the time and some tea I would show you what two years later my life became .. build it and they will come . Dream it and I promise it is possible. Write about it for a year and you will have the blue print

- - - Updated - - -

Feeling stagnant is really truly a subtle form of torture , I can say for myself after 10 years of sitting at a desk I wanted to shoot myself, and I couldn't see any other path, it just looked like a long repetitive line of this is my life.. wtf and then because I really couldn't see any way out I started very small , I started with this book
Morning Pages | Julia Cameron Live
and I know it's going to seem like bullshit but you've really have to start somewhere and this provided for me a canvas to Build out what I wanted my life to look like and if you and I had the time and some tea I would show you what two years later my life became .. build it and they will come . Dream it and I promise it is possible. Write about it for a year and you will have the blue print

I love this, thank you so much.

 

[Abcdenfp]

I love this, thank you so much.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

Thanks for the support, guys.

I have pondered many times what my passions are, and generally I either feel like I have too many or none at all. I know that sounds like it doesn't make any sense, but the thing is that over the years, I have had SO MANY ideas for what I should be doing. And at the time, they all felt right. I feel like I have serious issues committing to major change. At this point in life, I definitely fear failure, but not in the sense that most would. I know I am a highly competent individual, but the last few years have shook me so much that I have been reshaped. I have seen firsthand how sudden unexpected changes can really weigh a person down and throw one massive wrench after another into even the most well-oiled machine. I'm not pessimistic in the sense that I expect the worst, it's more that I look at how close to the edges of financial failure and emotional breakdown I am and I ask myself "how much can I handle right now?" I have had a lot of ups and downs the last few years. Many of you know about my unhealthy previous marriage, the lengthy divorce, my health issues, my depression, the fact that my ex-husband is a fucking lunatic, and my general struggle with life and relationships. Obviously, life is hard, for all of us. I just generally worry that I don't have what it takes to do this on my own, emotionally. I carry stress in my body and I already have high blood pressure, and it's becoming quite apparent to me that this will be the end of me if I don't get it under control (stress, that is).

As much as I loathe being a groomer, and as stressful as starting a business is, I honestly think it's my best chance at getting to a better place, eventually. I just really don't think I can do it on my own, and I don't wanna fall into the arms of a man for dependency reasons. (I have a bunch of drama right now because I broke up with my boyfriend, whom is a wonderful man, and I have been struggling with my feelings over whether or not we are right for each other).

I digress and this is getting too personal... but as you can see, there are many issues I am simultaneously juggling at basically all times.

Logistically, my credit score is phenomenal and I have almost no debt (less than $2,000 including medical bills and credit). I own my car and I rent an affordable apartment. I could get a business loan without a hitch. But the fucking stress of it... AND, I have no business knowledge!

As for the market, the supply in this area is FAR behind the demand. Most privately owned grooming salons here are booked out at least 2 months, and the big box chains are not favored. I am also sure that I could recruit a couple groomers whom I have worked with. But my ultimate goal is to NOT GROOM, or groom very little, within 1-2 years of opening. Numbers are not my strong point and I will not move forward with this unless it's bullet proof.

It's not my passion though, and doing this may feel like selling my soul. I know that may sound silly, but it is always in the back of my mind and makes me feel like a fraud.

 

[highlander]

I have pondered many times what my passions are, and generally I either feel like I have too many or none at all. I know that sounds like it doesn't make any sense, but the thing is that over the years, I have had SO MANY ideas for what I should be doing. And at the time, they all felt right.

I'd still ask the same question as before. What are the things that you enjoy doing and that energize you? It's not about ideas or necessarily even passions. A few people get to do a job fulfilling their passion but I'd say that's a minority of people. What you want to do is find a job that allows you to exercise your strengths on a regular basis.

If you take a look at this video, this guys stuff is pretty good and I believe accurate. I learned about it at a leadership retreat. My top strengths included things like directing, building, creating and mentoring. What I have learned over the years is the times that I've been the most successful, energized and accomplished great things is when I'm using all my strengths in combination.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

I'd still ask the same question as before. What are the things that you enjoy doing and that energize you? It's not about ideas or necessarily even passions. A few people get to do a job fulfilling their passion but I'd say that's a minority of people. What you want to do is find a job that allows you to exercise your strengths on a regular basis.

If you take a look at this video, this guys stuff is pretty good and I believe accurate. I learned about it at a leadership retreat. My top strengths included things like directing, building, creating and mentoring. What I have learned over the years is the times that I've been the most successful, energized and accomplished great things is when I'm using all my strengths in combination.

Thank you for this, it's exactly what I needed.

I do think that I've been looking at my strengths/weaknesses all wrong. Life has sort of made me a shell of myself, but I also think I never really got to find what truly inspires me. I haven't felt energized in ages, but when I think about what would energize me, I come up with the following:

-brainstorming (I've long considered myself an "ideas (wo)man")
-creating, in an abstract, not yet well-defined sense
-writing persuasive/informative/inspirational pieces (writing a book one day would be the ultimate dream)
-inspiring others
-helping others reach a goal
-learning
-teaching
-being a leader of some sort

I think that's a good start, as abstract as it may seem.

I definitely feel a shift toward optimism after hearing these suggestions, so I might as well roll with it and make it a daily practice and just see what happens. Thank you.

 

[highlander]

Thank you for this, it's exactly what I needed.

I do think that I've been looking at my strengths/weaknesses all wrong. Life has sort of made me a shell of myself, but I also think I never really got to find what truly inspires me. I haven't felt energized in ages, but when I think about what would energize me, I come up with the following:

-brainstorming (I've long considered myself an "ideas (wo)man")
-creating, in an abstract, not yet well-defined sense
-writing persuasive/informative/inspirational pieces (writing a book one day would be the ultimate dream)
-inspiring others
-helping others reach a goal
-learning
-teaching
-being a leader of some sort

I think that's a good start, as abstract as it may seem.

I definitely feel a shift toward optimism after hearing these suggestions, so I might as well roll with it and make it a daily practice and just see what happens. Thank you.

That's a good list. Brainstorming was the other one I got that I couldn't remember so we have that in common. One thing that strikes me is that you're not using any of those talents in your current job. I think there are lots of jobs where those talents would be quite valuable though. How much college did you do? Do you think it's possible that you could find a job where they could help you pay for that?

 

[Abcdenfp]

I can totally relate to being in a profession where you feel like it's killing your spirit.. I am a person who thrives on being creative and I looked around one day and realized that nothing I was doing correlated with that.
I didn't have the resources to do anything dramatic. So I started writing, I started my morning pages for a year. And then I self published a book, it was basic and now I look at it and realize how much I learned from just the act of putting something I am passionate about into a daily practice.
The thing is once you put the wheels in motion it gives you momentum, that first book led to a second book that led to being a contributor to an online magazine, to now working on a small budget screenplay and I think it was really the act of being creative daily that made all the difference. I have a firmer grasp of how to translate what I want into something tangible.
My restaurant was the same way, one step then the another but I had already put into practice the art of turning concept into reality. pen to paper is really such a powerful way to do that. Putting what's on the inside and transforming it into a medium where you can see it and touch it come back to it and remind yourself just gives you the momentum.
You have already begun with that list ^^^ it gives a great snap shot at some awesome places to start being creative right away.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

That's awesome [MENTION=33711]Abcdenfp[/MENTION]

Mind if I ask about your books?

 

[Abcdenfp]

So my first one was an educational book for toddlers to learn sign language , but in story format. The second one is about a little girls magical ballon ride above the city she lives in. The one I am currently working on is about swimming pigs.
The articles I write are all about the beginning of the writing process. I honestly learned so much from the experience that I love to write about my view point on how it works. I think that is because for so long, I had the best ideas but nothing would materialize and then I would see someone doing exactly what I thought of and i would scream (internally) "thats my fucking idea!"
Here is an excerpt from one of my articles :

"I believe most that most creatives; (artists, writers, cooks, designers, entertainers, and entrepreneurs) have their versions of unfinished work. It could be an attempt at a recipe that didn't come out quite right or a business that didn't take off.
As a writer, I know that all of my unfinished works held great promise in the beginning. An idea would spring to mind and the creative juices would begin to flow. Everything seems possible at the start of the creative process. Words come easily and the creative energy draws you in. The idea is new and bright. The possibilities are endless.
But like so many other Creatives out there, I have experienced moments where a piece of work will be progressing along smoothly and then for some mysterious reason it just fizzles out. There is no finishing it. No reviving the work or pushing through the "block"; I am left with no other choice but to abandon it. Much like an incomplete thought or sentence, the momentum is lost and the moment passes. I mourn its passing. I am left feeling angry, frustrated and sometimes sad. All of the energy and time that was spent feels like a waste.
Our experiences in life have trained us to believe that unless our work is completed, it holds no value and should be discarded.
In so many other areas of our lives, we are expected to complete tasks and are judged upon the end result. So we begin to treat the creative process the same way as a task. We attempt to complete the work at any cost just to be finished with it, so that we, and others, may judge it. This judgment shapes the way we see ourselves, and our work.
This way of thinking can be counterproductive for Creatives, because creativity isn't logical and can't be tasked; innately we know this. Inspiration comes in waves. You must ride the wave to enjoy it, meeting the shore, happy for the experience. When we recognize that these unfinished works/failed attempts are an important part of the creative process, we realize that unlike most things we do in life, we don't need a reason to create. By allowing ourselves true creative freedom, we can begin to cultivate a space deep within that is open to possibilities and makes room for ideas to grow and flourish without fear or expectation. We must continuously tell ourselves, and each other, that joy is in the doing, and that beauty lies in our ability to create."

 

[great_bay]

Is it actually easy to know what you want to do. Just look at your internet history and see what are your most visited pages.