[MBTI General] ISTJs Explained By ISTJs: Post your questions here!

[EJCC]

Those don't exist.

...

<-- Hug for IZthe411

<-- Angry face at raz.

 

[Warm]

You forgot about Dark Chocolate ISTJ- Me.
I'm smart, can have a good time, have a lot of confidence, and will make you laugh.

 

[Donna Cecilia]

I´m not in that menu either.

Absinthe ISTJ: bitter at first, but nice when you get used to its flavour. Mysterious, rare to find, opens your mind when consumed. Still, it needs proper treatment in order to get the best of it.

It is said to be dangerous, but that has never been proved scientifically.

Nice exercise, EJCC.

Made up the text from what people close to me, and myself think. I always get weird opinions about myself.

 

[runvardh]

My ISTJ friend is never boring, especially when he has our ESFP to scare.

The only issues are when he carries a knife into the wrong kinds of places or when I have to drag him by the collar to do something he's reluctant to for one detail or another. He listens good enough though and I know how to get through to him when the Loop starts.

 

[EJCC]

I´m not in that menu either.

Absinthe ISTJ: bitter at first, but nice when you get used to its flavour. Mysterious, rare to find, opens your mind when consumed. Still, it needs proper treatment in order to get the best of it.

It is said to be dangerous, but that has never been proved scientifically.

Nice exercise, EJCC.

Made up the text from what people close to me, and myself think. I always get weird opinions about myself.

I think that, at least in part, fits most of the ISTJs I know. Also, thanks - I like creative exercises. Gotta keep my Ne working, or else I might turn into the stereotypical, boring, uncreative ESTJ that everyone complains about. Kinda like how some people do crosswords every day to keep from getting Alzheimer's, only not

 

[onceuponatime]

I was told I might be a ISTJ with high Fi.

What flavor ISTJ would that be?

 

[the killer potatoe]

One of my closest friends is an ISTJ. I respect the hell out of him. That being said, he has the personality of a German Shepeard (yes the dog.) He is Loyal and there when it's important. He is on the surface a people pleaser, but on a deeper level a very cynnical bastard. He deffinately has the little problem of pretty much ALWAYS following the rules (unless he's around me and a couple of other INTPs, but even then....)

 

[Vika]

Its it an ISTJ thing to not be able to/not want to say "sorry" or admit you were "wrong"?

...and if you do apologize, does it mean you're really worried you f-ed up?

 

[Donna Cecilia]

Its it an ISTJ thing to not be able to/not want to say "sorry" or admit you were "wrong"?

...and if you do apologize, does it mean you're really worried you f-ed up?

It depends on the context.

If it is at work, and they show me the proof of my wrongdoing, I apologize without hesitation.

At life, it´s harder. As I can´t figure out if I had hurt somebody, I can´t admit being wrong, because I don´t know if I am wrong. If the person tells me that he didn´t like what I said, or that it has been hurtful, I have no problem with apologizing, just because I know that is what I have to do in order to keep the relationship going.

 

[Betty Blue]

I also posted this in the ask an ESTJ thread, i thought it would be good to get ISTJ opinions...




"I have a question *raises hand*

My partner is XSTJ, he tested ESTJ when he took the test alone and ISTJ when he did it with me around. English is not his first language but he speaks it very well...however there were a few questions in the test he asked me to explain.
To get to the question....
Would a football manager be more likely to be an ESTJ or an ISTJ?
Thats it. Ta. "

 

[IZthe411]

Its it an ISTJ thing to not be able to/not want to say "sorry" or admit you were "wrong"?

...and if you do apologize, does it mean you're really worried you f-ed up?

Saying sorry is probably less of an exclusive ISTJ thing, and more of a T thing. It's probably more TJ than TP.

Personally, it's hard for me to be vulnerable- showing I care. So when it's time to say things like "I'm sorry", it's hard to do. Not that I am careless about the other's person's feelings. Once I realize that I hurt someone's feelings, I'll feel bad. But to actually utter those words takes something out of me.

 

[raz]

I apologize when I sincerely feel I made a mistake that hurt someone else. I'm much better now at admitting I'm wrong than I was 10 years ago, but it's still like 75% chance of being able to do it. It's really just that it makes me feel incompetent to be wrong. But, then I like admitting I'm wrong just to know I'm better than a lot of guys that can't say they're wrong.

 

[coconut]

We're just all part of a larger system, in a way. The SJs just maintain the order.

I believe this. And the fact there are so many more SJ's than the other types makes me think that must take a lot of them to maintain the order that the rest of us keep trying to mess up.

We couldn't live without the NTs because the SJs just don't have the capacity to think in the manner of an NT.

Don't have the capacity? Please, say it ain't so! That was going to be my question. I spend a lot of time with a couple of SJ's (I'm married to one and I spend a lot of time with the other one because our kids play together) and I need to be able to talk to them. With one, every topic becomes a competition/debate that must be won, with the other, most topics are steered away from for comfort's sake. And I feel like if I have to continue avoiding any weighted topics and talk about whether beans are two cents more in one store, or the weather, I'll die. Or kill.

I need to be able to find common ground and interest with both of the SJ's in my life, but I'm at a loss. There are important reasons why friendly relations have to continue, so I need some ideas.

 

[coconut]

I think SFJs are nicer in a sense...they laugh a lot. It seems like for them Fe is this desire to not offend anybody. They are very mannerly, and sometimes too nice.....almost to the point that they could be considered a doormat to some, and actually allow it to happen.

One of the SJ's in my question is ISFJ, and the need to not offend is very strong. But, to me, it means that our conversations have to stay in pretty dull territory, and I can only take so much of that.

 

[Donna Cecilia]

Don't have the capacity? Please, say it ain't so! That was going to be my question. I spend a lot of time with a couple of SJ's (I'm married to one and I spend a lot of time with the other one because our kids play together) and I need to be able to talk to them. With one, every topic becomes a competition/debate that must be won, with the other, most topics are steered away from for comfort's sake. And I feel like if I have to continue avoiding any weighted topics and talk about whether beans are two cents more in one store, or the weather, I'll die. Or kill.

I need to be able to find common ground and interest with both of the SJ's in my life, but I'm at a loss. There are important reasons why friendly relations have to continue, so I need some ideas.

Surely we are not capable of thinking like an NT. MBTI is about the differences in mental processes.

But, to save you from trauma, we can understand how an NT thinks. That´s how I get to common ground with all the NTs I know. Starting with my INTJ Father, to mention the closest NT I have.

Also, the friends who I share the most interests with, are NTs.

The only idea I can give you, is to try to understand SJ people, not thinking like us. If you achieve the second one, you will become an SJ yourself. Not a good idea, since relationships, along with mutual understanding, need mutual acceptance in order to continue.

 

[coconut]

So I think the reason why people say ISTJs are boring, emotionally distant, cold, robots, etc. is because they are identifying the ISTJ too much with the outer functioning.

Perhaps. But, then again, I see this, about ISTJ/INTJ, posted by an ISTJ that seems to confirm the ISTJ stereotype:

Based on my understanding of MBTI, Ni doms would have a lot more going on in their head besides basketball and shooting up trailer parks.

For me, wanting to find common ground with an ISTJ, this is not what I want to hear.

 

[Donna Cecilia]

For me, wanting to find common ground with an ISTJ, this is not what I want to hear.

First of all, don´t take it personally.

That post was a satire. We don´t go out shooting up trailer parks.

We have lots of things in our head, the difference is that we don´t mix them all up and make weird associations between them. We can think of every single thing as it is.

 

[BlackCat]

One of the SJ's in my question is ISFJ, and the need to not offend is very strong. But, to me, it means that our conversations have to stay in pretty dull territory, and I can only take so much of that.

Maybe you could ease in more intense discussion? ISFJs are really good about knowing who really likes them and for what reasons, so if you offend them I'm sure that she would know that you meant no harm (that's how they go if they love you). If this is one of your relationship needs, then she should compromise.

I'm not an SJ at all, but I've known a few ISJs and am hoping maybe I can help you out.

All of the relationships with SJs that I've had have varied depending on their age, interests, and gender. In my experience I get along the best with ISTJ females, followed very closely by ESTJ females out of the SJs. ISTJ females are awesome when we can connect!

But one thing has been certain with the SJs I've known, we just simply can't connect if we have dissimilar lifestyles or have no hobbies in common. With my SJ friends I've made we just generally talk about what's going on in our lives and how they are doing with work, school, and their personal stuff. It's just all about what's going on in our lives really. When I have work or school relationships with them in some way I find that we get closer easier. Also, as an SP myself (not sure how it works for you) I bond really easily with people in general by just DOING something with them. Anything really. Taking a drive, going someplace etc. And SJs seem to enjoy doing things; and they enjoy having favors done for them and enjoy giving and caretaking in return.

I have had intense discussions with my SJ friends. They seem to respond well, but it can get a bit dull as you said. But then again most conversations I have with anyone are dull unless I connect to them.

We have lots of things in our head, the difference is that we don´t mix them all up and make weird associations between them. We can think of every single thing as it is.

^This is how it works with every IS__ type.

 

[runvardh]

Coconut... weather can be quite the interesting topic if talked about the right way. Then again, I don't stop at "it's raining" or "it's cold"; I go into the cloud formations, upper tropospheric ice density, pressure systems and the movement of air masses. Some people aren't interested in that though - unless a storm that I said would show up does at the time I said it would.

 

[coconut]

That post was a satire. We don´t go out shooting up trailer parks.

It may have been meant as satire, but it hits a little too close to home. The ISTJ I know actually does talk a lot about those two things - basketball (and other sports) and quarantining groups of people who think differently. Maybe not literally shooting up trailer parks, but every discussion seems to end with some group of people not measuring up and therefore being of no value and no use, and who therefore should be rounded up and shipped off or whatever. From what I can tell, that is, indeed, a weakness of the ISTJ personality.

So, how do I get beyond that? How do I talk with such a person and bring them closer to understanding that all types are necessary and have their own strengths that are of value to the whole scheme of things, and keep it from drifting into a declaration that certain kinds of people who don't measure up to the ISTJ's standard shouldn't have a right to exist? There's a narrowness of thinking there tied up with value judgments that I need to get past -- but how? And how, when my own inclination as an INTJ is to take the other side and start debating the issue myself? I find myself taking a side in a debate completely opposite my own opinion out of frustration.