On enneagram tests, I usually score either sx/sp or sp/sx. My sense of humor is rather morbid, absurdist, and often with a tinge of satire.
I have nothing wrong with being typed as INTJ, yet here are some things that would seemingly go better with INTP:
* According to some, Js are left-brained and Ps right-brained.
* I really seek no application whatsoever in my studies. I am into purely abstract things (such as pure mathematics) with little connection to physical reality. This, however, could be uber-Ni.
* Of lesser importance, I am RATHER messy. But this is very unimportant.
If we assume a good friend. But I'd rather prefer to take your first answer, as I'm serious that most INTPs wouldn't even answer to start with.
Any whimsy to your humour? INTPs have a sense of whimsy. That's due to Ne being allowed room to play.
Strange on the messiness. But how messy is your messy though. If you recall the thread on how does your house/living area look like, while you may not be as zen as Wolf's, but are you anywhere near Santtu's stage?

That's a real P.
The lack of application could just be because you've not found something that really interests you though, and is not indicative of a type. If anything, I'd be interested to hear your motivations for choosing to continue doing something you have no interest in - perhaps that'd shed more light.
I'm not certain where the left and right brained thing comes from and if there's a real correlation.
Athenian. my take on yours:
I can't imagine anyone choosing the first option. You'd almost have to go with packing up and flying out.
Here's the dialog I imagine:
Me: Ahh! What was that! (responding to the car bump)
Them: I-I just hit someone!
Me: Oh my god! (gets out of the car and checks)
Me: It was a native. But do you realize how much trouble we'd be in right now if this had been a civilized person? We'd be stuck here in court, or possibly even prison. This is why you don't drink and drive, okay? Goodness, I can't believe you were so stupid!
Them: Well, what are we going to do now?
Me: What do you think? We're going to get the heck out of here before someone sees us. We'll pull the body over to the side of the road and try to make it look like he just collapsed for some reason. They probably won't know what did this as primitive as they are, and they're not likely to appeal to the larger legal system if they don't know an outsider caused this.
Them: I'm sorry about this.
Me: Yeah, me too. I just hope you understand what a terrible thing you've done and what could have happened to you, how much stress you're causing me, and that that's sufficient motivation to get you to stop drinking like this. Sigh. Let's just get out of here.
*drive off*
You show a similar evaluation of consequences right off the bat, but your way of bending the system is using what you understand of how
people will react - there's your difference with Merkw - he worked with the system.
Your focus when you reprimand your friend is values-based as well vs principles-based.
I'm curious as your stress-point is due to the fact that the order was broken though.