Personally, if I was one of those women, I'd wanna know what it is you want. A serious relationship? Fuckbuddies? Open relationship? [insert whatever you can think of]?
Well, I think it is all a case by case "what do you want" situation. For example, since you asked... "if I was one of those women..." ... I decided to take a look. I'm new to this Typology stuff so a month ago I would have not understood how similar you would have been to my INFP babies momma. In her case. I simply wanted to spend enjoyable time with someone doing things like talking, going shopping, analyzing our lives, relating to the differences in others and being friends. I do not try and put labels on things by telling a women. Hey girl, listen. "We are fuckbuddies, ok" Come on. That would be a blow to the feminine integrity. I would feel the same way if it were done to me. What could I possibly want then? Well to have the satisfaction of sleeping well every evening knowing that I'm living life till the fullest and not saving myself for "miss right" when maybe I'm not yet the "Mr Right" to begin with. I like to view being appreciative of the lovely people that are brought into your life as a gift of destiny that teaches you.
You do what you want, and what suits you, but not letting me know or deceiving me into thinking you'll build a life with me while you rather have an open realtionship is something I'm not exactly down for, and yes, I do believe I have a right to know, and get the same privileges as you. Instead of leaving me guessing and having a whole bunch of drama to deal with.
I've actually been down the "I have a right to know" thing before and understand what you mean. You probably do have a "right to know" within your world of values and feel that I need to let you know. I however, love law, understand it and also realize that your rights are no better than my and do not cancel out my simple "right to privacy" or "right to think about it". We all have our flaws and if I'm simply not willing to "tie the knot" in a bigger way, its simply because I'm not willing to. I'm not "sold" per se.
You're actually pretty cute because you mention "getting" the same privileges. Well, that is a gender thing. Since you're a women, maybe you have to deal with how society will view you and that added burden makes things not feel "fair". Why would you have to understand the privilege rule hierarchy in order feel that you could do what you want to do in the first place. Yes, there is drama to deal with but its probably personal drama that goes on in your heart since your more prone to feel instead of think about things and justice sometimes in directly correlated with how people are going to pay for things with something that "feels".
Mmm...this sounds more judgemental than it's meant to be. I don't have a problem with the way you view life. I have a potential problem with the apparent lack of information you provide these girls with. Let them know that you prefer this lifestyle. And let them decide if they wanna be a part of that. If you already did this, feel free to disregard my comments.
And yes, you sound very much like a young ENTP to me.[/QUOTE]
The judgmental part is ok. That's why we're on here, right? To let some steam out and speak our mind. (which is something I do in person as well by the way). Your potential problem is exactly that. "Your" problem. Your problem with the apparent lack of information. I'll return to the same thought framework as before and add a another twist to it. Let's for example that you have noticed that these women are generally happy when they are with you and that you are also very happy with them. You have great conversation, etc, etc. All of a sudden, you notice a surge of jealousy boil, their face changes, body language, tone of voice and they go into fit mode. Well, what I do is say this. Hey girl. You have issues. You are obviously dealing with major insecurity issues because jealousy is creeping up on you and as you know. Jealousy is a negative, counterproductive emotion that some people like to, in an easier way, classify as a sin. That venom you feel creep up on you, flow through your veins will eventually create cancers, rot out your heart and keep you from enjoying the fine time we were just having 5 minutes ago watching this movie. If you have a hard time watching a romance movie because it reminds of you another women who is blond and an acquantaince of mine then maybe we should watch War movies, documentaries or listen to music. Maybe you should just leave the house, cool off and call me when you feel better because I was having a great time and you're spoiling it with you damn insecurities. How can you fight being jealous? Maybe hypnosis, revenge I don't know... I have another troubles working on my stuff to have to live, think and act. Grow up I would say.