What's Your Love Type? (MBTI)

[ZNP-TBA]

3. When you first start dating someone ....

Do you open quckly or you are private ?


That totally depends on the exact circumstances and the other person. Also if I see that this is obviously not going to work I don't open too much at all ... I see no purpose.


On the other hand if I open too early I will probably steamroll over the girl, what in my culture isn't positive thing. (it makes you look like an ass)

I'd say go with what's typically more common. Since I'm still Fe I'm typically pretty open since I don't conceal my feelings in some kind of lock box (which reminds me of Fi) but I may not be too deep since there isn't a whole lot of depth feeling wise to explore. You being an xNTJ would still be Fi so you might be a bit more hesitant.

 

[Virtual ghost]

I found that I wanted to click both answers on a few of the questions, depending upon the person as well.

True, but I have a leaning towards one side on all of them. But that question was just "depends on specifics".

 

[Norrsken]

1. If I would get like minded friend that means that I would be interested in the person and that this date ends in a something more than friendship.

2. There isn't too many people that like me completely uncensoured, at least not at first. (especially women)

3. In my East European culture dates are generally hit or miss. The friendship option isn't really the wanted outcome, since it often ends in awkward dynamic. Especially since having female friends can render you as "taken".

Ah, I apologize. In the United States we are a bit more lax about this sort of thing, and lots of people have opposite gender friends. From what I can tell, East Europeans are more serious in the dating realm, and I definitely respect that.

 

[ZNP-TBA]

Ah, I apologize. In the United States we are a bit more lax about this sort of thing, and lots of people have opposite gender friends. From what I can tell, East Europeans are more serious in the dating realm, and I definitely respect that.

I'd beg the differ.

 

[Norrsken]

I'd beg the differ.

Really? I thought they took it more seriously.

 

[ZNP-TBA]

Really? I thought they took it more seriously.

I don't think its culture specific necessarily. I'm E.European and have a lot of friends from that culture and they are still in their 30s and claim to be serious about dating and settling with a wife but in reality they just don't take it seriously ( they like their freedom). It's a mixed bag because I know a lot of people that have gone to serious family status and others that haven't.

 

[Norrsken]

I don't think its culture specific necessarily. I'm E.European and have a lot of friends from that culture and they are still in their 30s and claim to be serious about dating and settling with a wife but in reality they just don't take it seriously ( they like their freedom). It's a mixed bag because I know a lot of people that have gone to serious family status and others that haven't.

Would you say there is more pressure on E.European women to get settled as quickly as possible in contrast to the men in your country? I think no matter where we go, most men take a masculine stance of "I like my freedom" mantra.

 

[ZNP-TBA]

Would you say there is more pressure on E.European women to get settled as quickly as possible in contrast to the men in your country? I think no matter where we go, most men take a masculine stance of "I like my freedom" mantra.

To be clear I'm not from an E.European country but I was raised in that culture within America since my parents are from the same country as Virtual ghost actually. TBH I think there is more pressure on men if the family is of the traditional variant (which most tend to be). My parents have dreamed of me going to Croatia ( [MENTION=4347]Virtual ghost[/MENTION] knows what I'm talking about) and meeting a woman there, bringing her back, and starting the family. Men are expected to be self-sufficient, independent, assertive, practical, and earn enough resources to support a little family (all of which I meet to a large degree) but then go find a woman in the community. If you're a guy and you live with your parents passed your early 20's you're considered a failure and unworthy of full respect but if you're a woman you can stay in your father's home well into your 30's so long as you get married ( think of the chick in My Big Fat Greek Wedding). Of course these traditional boundaries are being modified and some of those expectations are being changed as the culture embraces modernism but it's still a factor to contend with. Personally I don't think all the traditional expectations are necessarily bad but some are irrational.

 

[Virtual ghost]

I'd say go with what's typically more common. Since I'm still Fe I'm typically pretty open since I don't conceal my feelings in some kind of lock box (which reminds me of Fi) but I may not be too deep since there isn't a whole lot of depth feeling wise to explore. You being an xNTJ would still be Fi so you might be a bit more hesitant.

Well it isn't that I am not open, it is just that I don't throw plenty of personal information if I see that this is not going to work. On the other hand going with the option that is most common can be a bad choice since I am not too much into girls that are too much into mainstream.


But to be honest my main problem is that women openly sotonized me for decades and I have a trust issues/apathy in this area.
The line of examples is pretty long:

1. Making my maximum grade a D because bad person like me does not ever deserve more.
2. Making a number of birthday parties with inviting everyone but me
3. Sincere saying that I belong to mental institution
4. Saying on a date that you like me to my face and then stop answering phone/mail completely
5. Making up school test and grading it with F. Later I heard from another teacher that she does this sometimes to guys that remind her of the student she had sex with and they caught her.
6. My mother left me to rise myself since everyone deserves to be "free".

Etc etc etc.


If there is a singe thing that pushed me into isolation this is it. (but that is the saga for some other thread)
This is exactly why I have decided to swich form I to E since I am done with this and hidding myself for the sake of peace, people will just have to accept me or step away. (especially since my only crimes are bluntness and dark humor)

 

[Virtual ghost]

Ah, I apologize. In the United States we are a bit more lax about this sort of thing, and lots of people have opposite gender friends. From what I can tell, East Europeans are more serious in the dating realm, and I definitely respect that.

Serious is wrong word but women here can be pretty picky. The trick is that if you have plenty of female friends there are odds that are you are doing some of them without any comitments. What many women find to be a turn off since they are afraid that they will not be able to control this guy. (and often they can't)


EDIT: I once even got an ultimatum that I should brake up my female friendships if I want relationship. (and I turned it down)

 

[Norrsken]

To be clear I'm not from an E.European country but I was raised in that culture within America since my parents are from the same country as Virtual ghost actually. TBH I think there is more pressure on men if the family is of the traditional variant (which most tend to be). My parents have dreamed of me going to Croatia ( [MENTION=4347]Virtual ghost[/MENTION] knows what I'm talking about) and meeting a woman there, bringing her back, and starting the family. Men are expected to be self-sufficient, independent, assertive, practical, and earn enough resources to support a little family (all of which I meet to a large degree) but then go find a woman in the community. If you're a guy and you live with your parents passed your early 20's you're considered a failure and unworthy of full respect but if you're a woman you can stay in your father's home well into your 30's so long as you get married ( think of the chick in My Big Fat Greek Wedding). Of course these traditional boundaries are being modified and some of those expectations are being changed as the culture embraces modernism but it's still a factor to contend with. Personally I don't think all the traditional expectations are necessarily bad but some are irrational.

I agree with you on that last part. Traditionalism does have its merits, but it can only go so far until innovation sounds like a better idea!

 

[Merced]

Your Love Type: The Thinker (INTP)

In love, you are honest and serious about commitment. You try to be the best partner possible.
For you, closeness is something you think about and desire a lot of the time. Your sweetie also tends to be your best friend.

Overall, you are pure in your affection and feelings. You don't let anyone astray, and you are honorable in your intentions.
However, you tend to be suspicious and distrusting at times. You've been burned before, and it hurt!

Best matches: ENTJ and ESTJ

I just love some strong Te man...

 

[Verona]

Your Love Type: The Mechanic (ISTP)

In love, you are exciting, alluring, and definitely hard to catch. You refuse to settle.
For you, kissing is physical and sensual - more romantic than emotional. You like physical touch.

Overall, you are confident, fun, and optimistic. You don't have that many insecurities when it comes to love.
However, you tend to also be flighty and overly private. You don't get close to just anyone.s

Best matches: ESTJ and ENTJ

 

[CitizenErased]

Your Love Type: The Scientist (INTJ)

In love, you tend to be very private and withdrawn - even when things are going well. You don't open up easily.
For you, kissing and hugging are important in a happy relationship. They are less important when things aren't going well.

Overall, you are confident, intelligent, and serious about commitment. You don't do flings or casual relationships well.
However, you tend to hold back and not show your emotions. You think your actions should speak for themselves.

Best matches: ENFP and ENTP

Interesting that all results point to the opposite E/I and P/J dichotomy, so basically points out to the extroverted/introverted version of the dominant function (according to the type one gets in the test).

All in all, it's good I got INTJ, because I love Ne people.

 

[Hawthorne]

i do not understand the basis for opposite orientation function compatibility. Does Fe/Te not inherently devalue Fi/Ti respectively and vice versa?

 

[Kanra Jest]

In love, you feel deeply and experience intense emotions. You fall quickly and you fall hard.
For you, kissing and being physical is serious. It's how you best express your feelings.

Overall, you are laid back, warm, and a good listener. You tend to be happy and content with your partner.
However, you tend to seem lazy and disinterested sometimes. You have to fight complacency in relationships.

Best matches: ESFJ and ENFJ

Quite opposite typing as my actual self. Huh.. normally I don't fall for anyone. This might only apply to very very few through life.

 

[Pionart]

i do not understand the basis for opposite orientation function compatibility. Does Fe/Te not inherently devalue Fi/Ti respectively and vice versa?

Given the contradictory models used in the Typology community - i.e. one where Te devalues Ti, and one where Te devalues Fi, it would be best to base all such decisions empirically, i.e. based on compatibility as determined through in real life interaction with the person. As of yet, there is little research to properly confirm which types relate best to which other types; I do remember one such study regarding married couples in the MBTI, which stated that in general being paired with a Feeling type led to a better outcome and satisfaction in the relationship, and SFJ with NFP was one of the best matches of all. Of course, given the nature of the study, these results cannot be given too much weight.

I agree with the notion that it would be useful for there to be a standard and agreed upon model for which types get on best with other types. As it stands it seems that the two competing models would place INTP with either ENTJ or ESFJ - of course, in the latter INTP is called INTj, however this is purely nomenclature.

All in all, it is not too important. However, Te suppresses Ti in the mind of the individual themself, i.e. the Thinking function is given the extroverted orientation, most well differentiated if it is the dominant function, and in that same individual the opposing qualities, that is introverted Feeling, and given to the side of the unconscious. It does not say that Te suppresses Ti in others.

 

[SearchingforPeace]

ENFJ

In love, you give your all and feel guilty when relationships fail. You put your heart on the line.
For you, commitment is not separate from love and caring. You have no problem committing, even if you've been burned before.

Overall, you are humorous, giving, and motivational. You help your sweetie achieve his or her dreams.
However, you tend to be over-protective and critical of your partner. You only want the best for both of you.

Best matches: INFP or ISFP

 

[baccheion]

Your Love Type: The Visionary (ENTP)

In love, you are always trying to improve and grow your relationship. You refuse to let anything get stagnant.
For you, love should be a spontaneous adventure. Who knows where you're going or how you'll get there?

Overall, you are magnetic, inspiring, and a charmer. You keep a relationship feeling new, even if it's been going on a while.
However, you tend to get bored and want to change partners frequently. You need someone as dedicated to growth as you are.

Best matches: INFJ and INTJ

 

[Kambro]

Your Love Type: The Duty Fulfiller (ISTJ)

In love, you are committed, loyal, and dedicated to making things work. You think relationships are important.
For you, kissing is not purely physical - it's always linked with love or at least infatuation.

Overall, you are honorable, a good listener, and able to take criticism well. You fight fair.
However, you tend to also be stubborn and out of tune with your partner's feelings. You don't listen as well as you should.

Best matches: ESFP and ESTP


Since I am INT with a P/J this seems whacked?