Domino
ENFJ In Chains
- Joined
- Nov 5, 2007
- Messages
- 11,429
- MBTI Type
- eNFJ
- Enneagram
- 4w3
- Instinctual Variant
- sx/so
I had a very stressful episode a few days ago.
It was of a nature that I deeply internalized and could NOT objectify. When it's really bad, internal trauma that's close to the worst, I shut down. I stop speaking. Not because I choose not to speak, but because I can't speak. My ability to communicate goes away. I become entirely passive to whatever is happening around me. I can feel nothing. I shut down like my INFJ father when the news is really bad.
I only shut down like this when something really really bad has hit me right between the eyes. No time to defend myself. No time to brace. Even so, any action would be futile. It's of a certain nature - I'm going to shut down, regardless. It's like all the fuses blow at once and the whole house goes as dark and dead as a mausoleum.
My ENFP sister, having seen this a few times with me over the years, just puts her arms around me and hugs me, or just sits next to me quietly patting me. She knows I can't resurface willfully. I have to ride it out.
I react with silence. Then, slowly silence turns into some action when I'm starting to come back to life. Yesterday, I practically vacuumed the entire house.
Misery translates into angrily squeezing my environment until it chokes. Extreme misery translates into me washing out, turning into a ghost.
Can any other NFJs share?
It was of a nature that I deeply internalized and could NOT objectify. When it's really bad, internal trauma that's close to the worst, I shut down. I stop speaking. Not because I choose not to speak, but because I can't speak. My ability to communicate goes away. I become entirely passive to whatever is happening around me. I can feel nothing. I shut down like my INFJ father when the news is really bad.
I only shut down like this when something really really bad has hit me right between the eyes. No time to defend myself. No time to brace. Even so, any action would be futile. It's of a certain nature - I'm going to shut down, regardless. It's like all the fuses blow at once and the whole house goes as dark and dead as a mausoleum.
My ENFP sister, having seen this a few times with me over the years, just puts her arms around me and hugs me, or just sits next to me quietly patting me. She knows I can't resurface willfully. I have to ride it out.
I react with silence. Then, slowly silence turns into some action when I'm starting to come back to life. Yesterday, I practically vacuumed the entire house.
Misery translates into angrily squeezing my environment until it chokes. Extreme misery translates into me washing out, turning into a ghost.
Can any other NFJs share?