Why is it ok for you to correct others?

[EcK]

Is there anything off limits?

Because they're factually wrong or don't know how to analyse the data properly.
If I called a Picasso a Monet I wouldn't have any issue with someone correcting me.

If people can't handle being wrong and need safe spaces maybe they should work from home and get all their food delivered.

Now obviously it's rarely as simple as right and wrong in real life.
I can defend an argument I don't personally agree with. Generally in fluid contexts with several coherent possible answers I 'agree' with all perspectives I can see (at least to a degree)
I only categorically disagree with someone if their own reasoning doesn't stand on its own. Which is most of the time, for some reason.

I'm generally quite self-confident so my statements may sound categorical when my opinions aren't.
I communicate in this way because people usually don't 'trust/listen' if your own opinion seems contradictory and I can't be bothered explaining that it's in fact complexity and that it all connects at a higher level. So, I give straight, simpler answers instead.

 

[ThaumaturgicTheorist]

If you use those words then yeah. What about, you should try this and give an explantion of why or how?

Like i said, some people do not like to be corrected even in a nice way as it makes them feel stupid and incompetent. Some people just have to learn on their own because they project their feelings onto the intent of others. You can correct that, but again...you can see the loop here.

Yeah, that tends to look more like a suggestion than a correction - guess my mind's nitpicking.

This is interesting .

Do you perceive being wrong as indicitive of stupidity and incompetence? Do you think there's something shameful about having to be corrected? If so, why?

Yes and yes. An intelligent person would be knowledgeable beforehand such that they don't need correcting.

 

[Dreamer]

I only really have an issue if someone corrects me and it disrupts my flow of thought. My mind hops off the train so often, even when no one interrupts me, and sometimes I can't even return to that original thought and then the moment is just ruined, so if you're going to correct me, please have the decency to do so after I finish my thought. Wow that sentence ran on for so long. If this is how I talk around others then good luck trying to impart your words into mine.

For me, I rarely correct others. Especially if it is a spelling mistake or something minor like that. As long as I know what they're trying to say or what their point is, those mistakes are so trivial to me, it's a waste of time to correct the person. Also, when people say something I don't agree with or if they've come to conclusions I don't see makes any sense, my default is to just ask questions to see how they came to those conclusions. It won't make their statement right if I know it's factually wrong, but at least I'll know WHY they think that way. The benefit to this is, sometimes through my questioning, the other person realizes holes in their argument and tends to close the argument on their own accord. I really don't like confrontation so this is sort of how I approach them.

 

[Santosha]

The only thing I am feel strongly about 'correcting' these days, is my perspective - when others show a genuine interest and are receptive to it. I dunno, I guess I view truth as a very fluid thing, and It seems that many things that appear to be fact can be argued, depending on what source one wishes to draw from. I used to think others corrected people largely for their own ego... But now I think it might be more of a projection.. That they have been taught that being 'wrong' (not conforming to the ideas of the time) is so unacceptable, that they genuinely believe they are helping others in these corrections. So it's not necessarily a poor intent. More of a lack of awareness of the ole 'when the student is ready, the teacher emerges'.

 

[Cloudpatrol]

I don't know if it's "ok" that I correct others.

I will say that it is a compliment of sorts, because it is extremely rare that I will ever venture to correct someone.

(I consider correcting different than attempting to sway or change someone's view which is commonplace debating/conversation)

If I correct you it means that you are one of the people that I am most comfortable with on the planet. That I think you are brilliant in general and so feel that my correcting you won't take away from that.

And, that I feel that we are on an equal 'playing field' and likely you have taught me things or corrected my views and created an atmosphere where I feel comfortable to let you know if something is amiss.

I just realized that my friend's likely have no idea that this is how I perceive this (laughs).

 

[Lark]

Meaningless to seek understanding? Interesting....





Who defines what's right and wrong? In some circumstances it may be obvious...

In others, it could be subjective, no?

I dont believe you are trying to seek understanding, I do believe you're seeking to create doubt and confusion.

I dont believe that it is subjective and when it is I do believe the subjective aspect is usually exaggerated in extremis.

Although, for the sake of argument, give me an example of what you're talking about, I can think of obvious examples of right and wrong but I can not think of an instance of subjective right and wrong.

 

[EcK]

A good example of when it's not okey

 

[Cloudpatrol]

A good example of when it's not okey

I'm a mostly LQIMH 'er (laugh quietly in my head) but you frequently make me LOL [MENTION=5643]EcK[/MENTION]

 

[EJCC]

Why is it ok for you to correct others?

Interesting topic.

It's okay for me to correct others in the same way that it's okay for me to do whatever I damn well please. The limitations on my correcting others are basically the same as all the other limits on my behavior: common courtesy, politeness, kindness. Within those limitations, I'm free to be me, even when "being me" means "being a meddlesome know-it-all".

Are there cases in which you're uncomfortable with correcting someone? Or are there cases that would make it feel unjust to correct another person?

Other than the above examples (when it's impolite / not courteous / unkind), I'd be uncomfortable correcting someone if the correction was unproductive. If the correction didn't lead to the endpoint that I wanted it to lead to. Why correct the person if the person doesn't end up actually corrected?

In short...

I suppose the response to the OP's question I really would like to pose is the obvious:

"how is it not?"

... It's not okay when it means 1) being counterproductive, and/or 2) being a dick. Otherwise, whatevs, you do you.

 

[Kho]

I correct others that are obviously wrong when:
I care about them, and I believe they're worth correcting.

I don't correct others when:
a) I don't feel like it and/or
b) I feel like they're a waste of my energy and time.

The latter is most of the time. I can't be bothered really.
But when I do correct others, I'm crazy meticulous about it.

 

[Pionart]

Genuinely curious, so you do it for the other person's benefit? In terms of growth? Does that give you satisfaction?



So you do so, to help them?

Is there another reason that people would do it?

 

[Yama]

I don't like to correct people. I also don't like it when they're wrong. But unless their wrongness is going to affect me personally or cause some sort of terrible misunderstanding, I just kind of leave them alone. I try to be nice about it though. I don't want them to be embarrassed or get upset.

 

[Ursa]

Correcting others presumes that you're right and they're wrong. Since there are far more instances in this world where being "right" is a merely subjective matter of interpretation, we collectively find ourselves in the position that there are far too many people ready to deliver correction and too few wise enough to realize they'd be more helpful to listen or actually stay silent.

No one should stay silent because they may be incorrect. Sometimes the best way to learn is to put oneself out there, argue and get corrected. Quality discussion isn't only about the comments, but also about the responses and counters, turtles all the way down. And even if you may not learn from it, someone else may have.

 

[SpankyMcFly]

Depending on the delivery -- which is often terrible because most people don't seem to know how to do it right -- you're more likely to piss them off than to teach them anything.

Hopefully then, through that sort of experience, you'll learn how better to get corrections across. If you don't learn from it, you're as dense about that subject as they are about your subject.

I concur. “It is not what you say that matters but the manner in which you say it; there lies the secret of the ages." ~ William Carlos Williams

First though one needs to determine if they care, if that care is relevant and just as importantly where that care is coming from.

If the issue is about their core traits/identity though I'd add; people only change when they 'have to' which often only occurs after defeat/failure/error. Only then will their minds and/or hearts be open to new ways of being and looking at the matter.

 

[ceecee]

Correcting others presumes that you're right and they're wrong. Since there are far more instances in this world where being "right" is a merely subjective matter of interpretation, we collectively find ourselves in the position that there are far too many people ready to deliver correction and too few wise enough to realize they'd be more helpful to listen or actually stay silent.

You have to know when it's best to let people learn on their own. Correcting them won't help. I mean, you want to say this....

but many times you have to ask yourself - what's the point?

 

[Virtual ghost]

Who defines what's constructive?

Common sense ?


(which actually isn't that much common)

 

[Tilt]

Sometimes the act of not correcting others is much more detrimental than the risk of potentially offending them. Misinformation is one of the main culprits for miscommunication. Gotta weigh it out though.

 

[prplchknz]

I keep reading the title as "why is it ok for you to be correct?"
and i'm like

 

[1487610420]

I concur. “It is not what you say that matters but the manner in which you say it; there lies the secret of the ages." ~ William Carlos Williams

First though one needs to determine if they care, if that care is relevant and just as importantly where that care is coming from.

If the issue us about their core traits/identity though I'd add; people only change when they 'have to' which often only occurs after defeat/failure/error. Only then will their minds and/or hearts be open to new ways of being and looking at the matter.

that hurt my brain for about 15-30 seconds...

 

[SpankyMcFly]

that hurt my brain for about 15-30 seconds...

Typo due to phone typing and autofill. us = is

I should mention that phone typing is no longer like being water boarded. I'm adapting it appears. Fortunately I received the 'selfie' inoculation (Merck) back in 2000 right before the first cell cam and the booster shot in 06' just before touch screens came out in 07'.

^ From his cell