[MBTI General] Why do some thinkers demonize feelers?

[entropie]

No, it's ok. Hear that all the time

 

[Little Linguist]

. I can lie and I can acclimatize to you. But in the end I can not lie to myself, it is barefeet thinking that drives me and that drives my love.

I have come to know that ignoring that makes me unhappy in a relationship at the end, when all blabla is settled.

I have to admit, I read today the first post of BlueWing, that was in the post "S intelligence vs. N intelligence". That post was short enough to read, the others were too long .

In the end, I have to find my own way to deal with my emotions as a thinker. Cause I am a man and men are supposed to be strong. Not be unfair: I dont want to be weak, so I have to find my own ways.

But if you feelers could spare some time and maybe in those special moments, when chance is granted, give some neutral hint, how things work. Some neutral hint I understand too, with my poor english. I thank you with all my thanks I have

Question: When you say 'T' drives your love, what do you mean?

 

[entropie]

Can't exactly teel. I even do not remember writing this -.-

guess it is about the mind-mating thing

Thought about it.

I guess that meant, when love happens, when I fall in love, it happens. I dont think about it. But when it happens, it purely happens out of the mind, so with reason, not by chance.

There are some sort of girls, I immediatly would fall for and some I would never touch in all my life.

But when love happens, you cant control it, cant foresee it, you even cant expect it. It just happens and caughts you unexppected xD.

So I never thought about its very nature. Love is Love, it is just present.

What I have encountered with many girls is that they carry burdens around from past relationships. There is nothing more worse than someone you like talking about his past relationship. Or when you see things in her that she still has to work out. Sometimes you can help it, then you need to stand your ground and help her to the best of your abilities.

I really must say, being insane in the membrane enables you to stay innocent. And that gives you the chance even after a 4 year relationship that did not work out, to start from zero again. Completly resetted.

That is a gift, but I hope I will never need it again in my life

 

[Little Linguist]

Thought about it.

I guess that meant, when love happens, when I fall in love, it happens. I dont think about it. But when it happens, it purely happens out of the mind, so with reason, not by chance.

There are some sort of girls, I immediatly would fall for and some I would never touch in all my life.

But when love happens, you cant control it, cant foresee it, you even cant expect it. It just happens and caughts you unexppected xD.

So I never thought about its very nature. Love is Love, it is just present.

What I have encountered with many girls is that they carry burdens around from past relationships. There is nothing more worse than someone you like talking about his past relationship. Or when you see things in her that she still has to work out. Sometimes you can help it, then you need to stand your ground and help her to the best of your abilities.

I really must say, being insane in the membrane enables you to stay innocent. And that gives you the chance even after a 4 year relationship that did not work out, to start from zero again. Completly resetted.

That is a gift, but I hope I will never need it again in my life

I agree - love is love - and totally irrational. That's why I was not sure what you meant.

Carrying around emotional baggage is also irrational - some people can get over it; others cannot. However, I totally see how that would upset you; I mean, you are not that guy, so you want to have a chance to start fresh. Unfortunately, sometimes reality is a bit different.

However, I think it is wonderful and admirable that you can let go and not carry around any emotional baggage. It is a great gift to have.

It also helps to have a kind, loving person who understands you. I remember you saying you are with an INFJ - I think they are kind and loving while possessing great rationality and thinking skills. Sounds like a good catch! So I hope all is well.

 

[entropie]

I have come to know another thing. I guess mostly P-Types, maybe EP-types have a hard time to talk about love or a relationship or any sort of personal matters.

I do not think that is because they can not, but because they empathize more with people and you really get the things you want out of them, when there is a situation they can react too.

I once knew that brutal blonde in a disco, when I was single. She asked me out and I felt like being interrogated. It was not really that hard but her questions were keen and precise. Those dart questions, you cant evade but answering them. My surrounding friends did not get it, why I started to make fun of her to get rid of her, but I just could not stand her questions.

I have a broadband of moral, relational, social and behaviourial knowledge and experience in me and I tick nearly churchlike. I dont brag, I dont kiss and tell and I have never cheated a friend. But I have no repertoire of answers at hand.

Maybe it is an Ne-thing after all, you like to get someone to know through discussion and then specualte on his intentions. But I think it is an EP thing also. They like to empathize with people and not present them their rules of behaviour in the first place.

Pretty though thing to overcome with my special one at times too. But we talked about it and she did understand.

At the beginning when she has asked crucial questions, I always came up with things like "no, true, melons cant fly" xD.

I guess this personality sometimes makes you sort of a mystery to other people. When I grow older I can probably use this as an advantage in business

 

[Maabus1999]

Thought about it.

I guess that meant, when love happens, when I fall in love, it happens. I dont think about it. But when it happens, it purely happens out of the mind, so with reason, not by chance.

There are some sort of girls, I immediatly would fall for and some I would never touch in all my life.

But when love happens, you cant control it, cant foresee it, you even cant expect it. It just happens and caughts you unexppected xD.

So I never thought about its very nature. Love is Love, it is just present.

What I have encountered with many girls is that they carry burdens around from past relationships. There is nothing more worse than someone you like talking about his past relationship. Or when you see things in her that she still has to work out. Sometimes you can help it, then you need to stand your ground and help her to the best of your abilities.

I really must say, being insane in the membrane enables you to stay innocent. And that gives you the chance even after a 4 year relationship that did not work out, to start from zero again. Completly resetted.

That is a gift, but I hope I will never need it again in my life

Agreed with all of this, no matter what your type is.

 

[Little Linguist]

I have come to know another thing. I guess mostly P-Types, maybe EP-types have a hard time to talk about love or a relationship or any sort of personal matters.

I do not think that is because they can not, but because they empathize more with people and you really get the things you want out of them, when there is a situation they can react too.

I once knew that brutal blonde in a disco, when I was single. She asked me out and I felt like being interrogated. It was not really that hard but her questions were keen and precise. Those dart questions, you cant evade but answering them. My surrounding friends did not get it, why I started to make fun of her to get rid of her, but I just could not stand her questions.

I have a broadband of moral, relational, social and behaviourial knowledge and experience in me and I tick nearly churchlike. I dont brag, I dont kiss and tell and I have never cheated a friend. But I have no repertoire of answers at hand.

Maybe it is an Ne-thing after all, you like to get someone to know through discussion and then specualte on his intentions. But I think it is an EP thing also. They like to empathize with people and not present them their rules of behaviour in the first place.

Pretty though thing to overcome with my special one at times too. But we talked about it and she did understand.

At the beginning when she has asked crucial questions, I always came up with things like "no, true, melons cant fly" xD.

I guess this personality sometimes makes you sort of a mystery to other people. When I grow older I can probably use this as an advantage in business

I hope I was not imposing by asking you difficult questions - that was certainly not my intent. Last thing I want to do is be seen as a 'blonde disco girl'. Yeeeech.

Sure, I love discussion and finding out things that way as well. Sometimes I totally asked some direct questions though. Nowadays, I probably would not be do direct and blunt - but I think once you have achieved a level of intimacy (I don't mean sexually in this case - I mean emotionally) direct questions should be okay. I generally mix both.

Again, I think it is interesting to see your perspective. Thank you for sharing.

 

[entropie]

I hope I was not imposing by asking you difficult questions - that was certainly not my intent. Last thing I want to do is be seen as a 'blonde disco girl'. Yeeeech.

Sure, I love discussion and finding out things that way as well. Sometimes I totally asked some direct questions though. Nowadays, I probably would not be do direct and blunt - but I think once you have achieved a level of intimacy (I don't mean sexually in this case - I mean emotionally) direct questions should be okay. I generally mix both.

Again, I think it is interesting to see your perspective. Thank you for sharing.

No you havent at no time. I like your input, too

I was opposed here one day by some rigid people I don't remember and I felt interrogated a bit. For I think, you really do not know anybody here, so you cant judge him by one sentence.

But I guess that is one of the main flaws, MBTI brings with it. You can forget to get a person to know, when you know from the beginning what her/his personality supponsingly is. But this is only an Extreme, dont think anyone has gotten this far yet xD

 

[Little Linguist]

No you havent at no time. I like your input, too

I was opposed here one day by some rigid people I don't remember and I felt interrogated a bit. For I think, you really do not know anybody here, so you cant judge him by one sentence.

But I guess that is one of the main flaws, MBTI brings with it. You can forget to get a person to know, when you know from the beginning what her/his personality supponsingly is. But this is only an Extreme, dont think anyone has gotten this far yet xD

Yes, true. I think everyone has something to offer; in fact, that is why I am here. If I were obsessed with myself and my own ideas, I could just lock myself up in a room and talk to myself all day long. Or become a college professor and just lecture all day. No. I come to a forum to hear other people's ideas and to bounce my ideas off of other people and get feedback. Sometimes I get a bit excited, fiery, and animated but it is never meant in an antagonistic manner.

Anyone who totally discredits something due to the person's personality type is a total fart. That's my subjective opinion.

It's great that you are one of the open-minded fellows. You and some of the others on here give NTs a good name in my book.

 

[entropie]

If you go on, I start asking you out

 

[Mort Belfry]

Why do some thinkers demonize feelers?

Because only we can see their true evil.

 

[animenagai]

I have come to know another thing. I guess mostly P-Types, maybe EP-types have a hard time to talk about love or a relationship or any sort of personal matters.

don't know if ENFP's are indicative of all the other EP's but i have no problems taking bout love . i think this would be more of a T thing if anything, this wanting to be objective.

 

[entropie]

Good point there.

I have no problems talking about love either. But talking about "what I want" is a different story

 

[Maabus1999]

It's great that you are one of the open-minded fellows. You and some of the others on here give NTs a good name in my book.

I swear open minded discussions get me in trouble all the time. Especially if I get bored when I go out with folks and get a few drinks...

Close minded rigidity sucks

 

[Domino]

Because only we can see their true evil.

This is true and never give up the good fight!

(never mind the fact we will, in all our evilness, try to stop you, but please do carry on. We want you to feel like you're doing well!)

 

[Giggly]

I have come to know another thing. I guess mostly P-Types, maybe EP-types have a hard time to talk about love or a relationship or any sort of personal matters.

I do not think that is because they can not, but because they empathize more with people and you really get the things you want out of them, when there is a situation they can react too.

I once knew that brutal blonde in a disco, when I was single. She asked me out and I felt like being interrogated. It was not really that hard but her questions were keen and precise. Those dart questions, you cant evade but answering them. My surrounding friends did not get it, why I started to make fun of her to get rid of her, but I just could not stand her questions.

I have a broadband of moral, relational, social and behaviourial knowledge and experience in me and I tick nearly churchlike. I dont brag, I dont kiss and tell and I have never cheated a friend. But I have no repertoire of answers at hand.

Maybe it is an Ne-thing after all, you like to get someone to know through discussion and then specualte on his intentions. But I think it is an EP thing also. They like to empathize with people and not present them their rules of behaviour in the first place.

Pretty though thing to overcome with my special one at times too. But we talked about it and she did understand.

At the beginning when she has asked crucial questions, I always came up with things like "no, true, melons cant fly" xD.

I guess this personality sometimes makes you sort of a mystery to other people. When I grow older I can probably use this as an advantage in business

This resonates with me. I have been on both sides of this coin.

 

[Nocapszy]

I think "Feeling" is faulty nomenclature. People associate it with emotions and irrational emotionalism.

Feeling is a poor name for what it does.

It's not unjust to relate it to emotions though. It is invariably the direct result of an emotion. It's just that, we can't say Feeling equates, because not all emotions are automatically Feeling judgement.

Extroverted perception often appears to offer emotive responses as do all introverted functions when violated or otherwise released -- see: catharsis -- including Ti (yes I'm talking to you Bluewing).

 

[Nocapszy]

I second Cafe's approach.

Conceptually, most link the term with irrationality and/or a fragile intellectual state held forever captive by unpredictable, naked passion.

Then again, most people are stupid.

And yet many of them are Ts.

Thinking could be veiled as selfishness.
Maybe we're the demons.

No wait! It must be those impulsive sinning Se types.
Or the conniving intuitors; perhaps its them.


Find my angle.

 

[Magic Poriferan]

I've often reflected on the fact that no perfectly, or universally satisfying words can be found for the functions. Someone will always complain that they sound wrong in one way or another, and those who rely on connotation are especially difficult to satisfy.

But I did come up with one idea that I at least think is better than Thinking and Feeling, which are highly ambiguous. My idea was that it might be better to call them Logic and Ethic. Logical and Ethical. Of all the words I could think of, none seemed to more closely match the definitions of Thinking and Feeling than logic and ethic. It is what the two functions principally deal with.

 

[Giggly]

Magic, I think you should write a book and become the next Jung.