[sx] Why are sx-doms so common in typology communities?

[Southern Kross]

I can be pretty antisocial and misanthropic, probably because I'm a 1 and have no Fe.

Same here.

This smiley was what I thought of too.

The issue I have with the way a lot of people describe social-doms and the social instinct is that it just doesn't seem to measure up to sp and sx descriptions. Not saying that sp and sx are described as "better" but that the sp and sx descriptions actually seem to discuss more the priorities of those instincts than the way they perceive their surroundings. Otoh, the social instinct just seems to be described as an "awareness" of how interpersonal dynamics are functioning in your surroundings and what things represent in a broader social context. I get how that can be prioritized (just as much as how I get sp creates an awareness of what your body wants, what needs to be done to ensure "security," etc), but the "core drive" of it doesn't seem to be touched on as much as the other two. I often see descriptions saying the social variant desires a sense of belonging, community, social alliances, etc but that just doesn't sound completely accurate to me.

Oh, I'm so with you. I often argue for the "awareness" descriptor because it allows for both positive and negative social response (eg. being social or antisocial), but as you point out so well, it fails to really get to the heart of social instinct.

I like creating new connections and bonding with people, the feeling of being included and having close friends to make me feel connected, and I do see that as one of my driving forces but the "awareness" that gets discussed is something I either sometimes have or other times completely lack. I forget to check in with others a lot, I really neglect how my actions impact my environment when taking action, and I kind of don't really scan my social environment at all sometimes. It doesn't seem to be something that really burdens my mind or anything, but at the same time I feel a lot more lighter and cordial for sx/so, and I seem to have more healthier attitude towards the sx instinct (at least in my mind anyway) so I'm not sure! I feel like the social instinct needs a lot of clarification haha.

Yeah, I'm the same. I'm pretty crap at these things too. Social doms just aren't the sort of uber-Fe + e3 personalities they're often portrayed as. For me personally it's so much more about the theoretical connections and dynamics themselves, than the specific, individual parts (eg. like remembering people's birthdays), or even skills in the direct, practical application of this knowledge (eg. like being able to charm or influence others). The general descriptions don't have much room for that potential theoretical aspect, although some of the combined type and instinct descriptions do (like the Social 4 being the "social critic", which really clicks with me).

I would say that search for security is a factor in all the instincts, because I see them as addressing factors perceived as being too much in flux and attempting to create stability through them. For the Sexual instinct, for example, is about the need for the security of a strong connection, because Sx-doms feel a sense of fragility in their bonds that they need to overcome. I guess I think of the central drive for the social instinct as some sort of desire for mastery over or reconciliation between interpersonal structures, forces, and dynamics (so that they don't seem so scary, shifting and unpredictable).

To bring this back on topic (and just in case this wasn't clear), I think the point is that there are many Sp and So doms that don't understand their own instinct and end up mistyping as Sx. The point is the problem lies less with the Sexual instinct, and more with the problematic descriptions of Sp and So.

 

[HongDou]

I would say that search for security is a factor in all the instincts, because I see them as addressing factors perceived as being too much in flux and attempting to create stability through them. For the Sexual instinct, for example, is about the need for the security of a strong connection, because Sx-doms feel a sense of fragility in their bonds that they need to overcome. I guess I think of the central drive for the social instinct as some sort of desire for mastery over or reconciliation between interpersonal structures, forces, and dynamics (so that they don't seem so scary, shifting and unpredictable).

Completely agree with your assessment. Solidified my idea of all three of the instincts, thank you! This reaffirmed so/sx > sx/so for me, since (while it certainly is something I try to handle) I don't let the fear of fragility in my relationships really burden my mind as much as I do grasping the structures and dynamics of the social realm because - yes, the social world really can seem scary and unpredictable to me. Which isn't surprising since I went from being home-schooled straight to public high school when I was 14. Makes me wonder how our instincts develop, biologically or through experience or otherwise. It is all just a theory (I haven't read any scientific research on the subject) so I guess there are a bunch of ways to explain how my priorities came to be.

 

[Haven]

Focus? direction? Priorities? Never have they been my strong suits. I follow the wind

 

[EJCC]

Focus? direction? Priorities? Never have they been my strong suits. I follow the wind

The heck kind of SJ are you?!?

 

[Haven]

The heck kind of SJ are you?!?

Oops, I mean friends and family are my priority, nothing else

 

[EJCC]

Oops, I mean friends and family are my priority, nothing else

:cop: Much better.

And don't forget your country!

 

[The Great One]

Sx doms are so prominent in enneagram communities because there are a lot of NFP types on typology sites and they tend to be frequently SX doms.

 

[anastasiaromanova]

Sx doms are so prevalent on Enneagram forums because a lot of people on Enneagram forums are young and most young people want to be sx doms. Same as with E4. Both also involving misconceptions about what that might actually entail. Not saying anything that wasn't already said several times here other than adding in the age factor, but since this seems to now be pretty much a dead thread, I felt it was a shame for it to not be properly embalmed before burial.

Typology forums attract lots of social firsts, and also lots of sp firsts, including sx lasts, that want to come out of their shell, as well as sx first. Potpourri. Should my modest post resurrect the thread, trust me, it would be pointless.

Lastly there is no reason whatsoever to assume anyone's self-typing on an Internet forum is correct unless you either know them well or you know they were typed with a professional. And even then there is plenty of wiggle room...

 

[Entropic]

I also wonder if sp/sx'ers don't self-mistype as sx-dom. I know I did, I feel like my sp-dom centers around keeping the sx in check, feeling like it's the defining part of me.

Tbh, a lot of people don't get the social instinct either. I see both so and sp doms with sx secondary mistype as sx. I actually did it the other way around, I first mistyped as my blind spot (sp/sx) to figuring out I'm sx/so. Funny how that worked out.

 

[madelei]

If Sx doms were as common, people would see them more often irl.
I don't think many would disagree that they meet/see Sx doms much less often than the other variants.
I couldn't count on both my hands how often I've heard people say that they don't seem to meet/see Sx doms very often.
I have never once, however, heard someone talk about all the Sx doms they're constantly running into or coming across.
I think there's a reason to this simple and commonly expressed observation: cuz sx doms are indeed less common.

Uhhh I don't think it's really that easy to "spot" an sx dom. Especially since the instincts work in accordance with your enneagram, so say, an sx 5 would look very different from an sx 4. Sx's are more likely to be attention grabbing, but that doesn't mean it's always obvious when a person is sx. Some people you look at, and you're sure they're sx. But I think there are a lot of people that you just can't tell are sx. I personally think the majority of people I know have sx in their top stackings.

I mean, compared to the self-preservational and social instincts, it's just really not that important.

Or, better said, you just really don't need as many of them.

The reason we're less common, anyway, imo, is cuz how fucking important is it to the survival of a tribe?

No one is talking about the survival of a tribe. And being sx last, I think sx is actually really necessary to being a healthy person. Sx is important in so many ways- reproducing, having healthy relationships/ having close relationships at all, being able to open up to people, etc etc etc. How weird would it be if it was common for people to be uncomfortable in one-on-one interactions?

Don't let your " I need to be a snowflake" 4ness blind you here.

Also, what are you talking about?? The 4 who said that is an sx-dom.

 

[Yara the Corpse]

Because descriptions of Sp by itself don't seem to allow you to be intense, deep, and interesting, and only appear basic.

 

[Smilephantomhive]

Because descriptions of Sp by itself don't seem to allow you to be intense, deep, and interesting, and only appear basic.

I don't get why people want to make other types appear so shallow and basic. Wait I actually I do know, it's becuase being human is their only attribute, and they are narcs, so they want to be above others.

Anyway, it can happen with all types. People see SO I think as shallow and sp as materialistic (this part is true, but it's not all they are).

I always thought it was having deep connections with others, or well focusing on that. The other instincts are deep in other ways. So wants to make the world a better place, and SP wants to better themselves.

Obviously not every thinks SX is the only deep one, but with negativity bias, it is easier for newcomers to see the negative things about SO and SP that they pick SX. I'm sure plenty of SX types are real though. Idk I guess typology could be a good way to connect with others.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

I don't think this is even true. The mix doesn't seem that disproportionate to me. Lots of mistypes though.

 

[misfortuneteller]

I don't think they are. I think most may be sp firsts with a heavy sx influence or mabye they confuse the fact that they want a soulmate with being sx first.

 

[Neokortex]

Because everyone knows that you (most probably So/Sp, since the majority is that, next to Sp/So) won't be able to make others take you seriously by revealing that your motive in "making friends" is strategic social networking (So) and material gain (Sp), both stronger than the earnest desire for someone closely matching you, a "soulmate", a long lasting "one-on-one" friendship, etc. In other words: if you revealed you were So-dom, then people would believe that but not your other "types" because So-dom's interests dictate what type they are supposed to be compared to majority preference (if you are in America, today's political climate and Zeitgeist favors introverts and non-aggressive people). And if everybody revealed their types it would turn out that the forums' compartmentalizations of ordering each type to categories resulted to nothing more than just random people making cliques, admins and mods included. And finally, because people are encouraged on the forum to act out their types and liars are not an exception.

 

[The Cat]

Also we quit spraying the yard.

 

[Luminous]

Also we quit spraying the yard.

But that's how you get ants! sx ants!

 

[ThoughtBubbles]

i actually don't feel like they are (been a member of other similar communities before). i DO think that introverted intuitives are vastly overrepresented though.

 

[The Cat]

But that's how you get ants! sx ants!

It's one of many ways.

 

[Metis]

It's one of many ways.

Where there's a will, there's a way.