Idealists and their Families
I couldn't find whether or not there is already a thread on this, and couldn't really be bothered going back more than 10 pages.
But just wondering about everyones experiences with their families type combinations and the relationships that come out of this?
My families type combinations consist of:
Dad - IxFx
Mum - ISFJ
Sister 1 - ISFJ - 26 yo
Sister 2 - INFJ - 20 yo
Me - ENFJ - 19 yo
Sister 3 - ISFJ - 17 yo
A nice Guardian/Idealist mix... maybe
First of all - I love them all to bits, but its interesting to look at the relationships in light of our types.
So outright I can tell you that I get frustrated with my families lack of socialising. Whenever I wanted to have a few friends round in school my parents would always have a melt down coz they knew 'a few friends' could easily be 40 to 50 people.
Mum,
ISFJ, plays the extrovert at home, I'd say she's on the cusp or something
Anyway it's difficult to analyse a relationship with your Mum coz they all (mostly) care for their kids. But she can be really over
emotional but also
caring. She has strict morals, but is ready to listen talk things through.
I've sometimes felt like I'm her counselor or something though... which is kind of weird.
Dad is caring, but I've found it real hard with him being so
quiet and unassertive. I think his mind naturally explores abstract concepts but he stops himself coz its all too hard. He's extremely strict morally - bit of a legalist. He's not really passive aggressive... more just won't participate until thoroughly provoked and then he'll snap.
My oldest sister, an
ISFJ, and I get on really well with her - actually she gets on with all of us really well individually in different ways. Apart from the fact that she's a fair bit older than the rest of us, she's always been
really protective , checking up on what we've been getting up to, and trying to stop us from "making her mistakes". She's somewhat passive aggressive at times. AND she's married to an ENTJ - which is such an ODD pairing. They're so different - both very organised though...
Sister #2,
INFJ, and I have a very weird relationship. We're really close in age and
fought like mad during our childhood and teen years. But we also loved to write fiction stories together, since before we could write (recording them on tapes!) and I guess we are kind of similar in that we've both gone into Arts courses.
She's often called me self-righteous in our irate moments, which I just don't understand coz I'm far from it. I think we both know we could have an awesome friendship, but its like its
incredibley strained relationship from the past - brought up under strict morals and that all still kind of hangs in the air (like, 'are you judging me?!'). We're only just beginning to get past the past a little and talk Sartre, Derrida and Marx without getting in an argument. Her partner is an interesting INTP, just very very different values to my family, which has made it all pretty awkward.
Sister #3,
ISFJ - is the baby of the fam. And we've always been incredibly incredibly close. We
played pretend for years when we were little, and she'd always participate in the games I organised and created; we both stayed kids for a lot longer than the older two. The first conflict we had was when she became a teenager and boys all fell in love with her and I just got heaps protective and we'd always fight about it. Now she has an ISTJ boyfriend who I get on pretty well with... but I get worried that they seriously
neglect their friends - you know those couples who are only interested in one another... and this is 2 and half years on!
She puts heaps or pressure on herself in school, and
gets stressed quite easily. She's unconfrontational when angry, which annoys me because when we fight she's just won't respond and storms off, whilst I'm like running off at the mouth. But I love her and would say she's the one I'm still closest to in the family coz we talk heaps, even if she isn't interested in half the things I am.
But all my sisters can be narky, critical bitches haha! Maybe coz I'm the only guy.
I think everyone thinks I'm the loud mouth of the family and they're learning not to confide in me because I'll probably tell another - with the best of intentions of course.
Anyway this has turned into a MAMOTH post, somewhat bloglike.
But please, give me your comments --- tell me your story! And your family type combo - how being a NF in your family has affected you. Oh, and who you're closest to/why etc.
