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What is the hardest thing about being a man?

Peter Deadpan

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I think for men especially, sex serves as a gateway to intimacy in the nonsexual manner. It fosters feelings of closeness and trust. For many women, although sex also deepens the connection, closeness and trust may be prerequisites to sex.

There are, of course, acceptions to the rule, and I don't mean this in black and white extremes, merely that the balance generally tips more one way for men, and the other for women.
 

Luigi

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[MENTION=31348]Peter Deadpan[/MENTION]

I'm an exception. I believe in waiting until you're married to have sex.

I don't view sex as a means to an intimate end. I view conversations like that.
 

Coriolis

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I treat women how they prefer to be treated, not how I prefer to treat them. And (go figure), most women prefer tasks that do not require physical strength- like wielding power tools they barely have the upper body strength to even pick up- or tasks that are large in scope requiring constant focus (distractable things), or tasks that are physically dangerous (consequence of the physical strength deficiency), or tasks that are gross or creepy (like crawling under a house to run wire or pipes with the spiders and dead animals). These are all things predicated on biology, not social engineering. So there's really nothing to be done about it, I'm sorry to have to tell you. At my gym there is this girl I've become friends with who has been lifting for years- she is ripped from head to toe- but me, having only been going there for a few months and still on the relative weak end of the male spectrum, still out lifts her in every category.
How lazy. So because the average woman has less strength than the average man, women in general should be treated as children? How about treating women as adults, in a way that neither panders to the worst in them, nor places undue burdens on men? As others have pointed out, statistical gender differences cut both ways, providing both advantages and disadvantages, depending on the task or situation. Sure, I might call my husband when a task is easier for a large, strong person (though even in machine shop class I never met a power tool I couldn't handle), but when his computer or phone isn't working, he comes running to me. Who, then, has the greater responsibility? Answer: neither, we share. Moreover, no individual is a statistic. It is tiresome and myopic for every discussion of gender to be oversimplified to "men are physically stronger", as if this is the only worthwhile human characteristic. Perhaps men do that because it is the only one where they can claim a statistical advantage.
 

anticlimatic

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How lazy. So because the average woman has less strength than the average man, women in general should be treated as children?

You do realize that the average woman and women in general are synonymous, yes? I treat people the way they want to be treated. How is that treating them like a child? I don't treat children the way they want to be treated. That's way too much candy for their own good.

How about treating women as adults, in a way that neither panders to the worst in them, nor places undue burdens on men? As others have pointed out, statistical gender differences cut both ways, providing both advantages and disadvantages, depending on the task or situation. Sure, I might call my husband when a task is easier for a large, strong person (though even in machine shop class I never met a power tool I couldn't handle), but when his computer or phone isn't working, he comes running to me. Who, then, has the greater responsibility? Answer: neither, we share. Moreover, no individual is a statistic. It is tiresome and myopic for every discussion of gender to be oversimplified to "men are physically stronger", as if this is the only worthwhile human characteristic. Perhaps men do that because it is the only one where they can claim a statistical advantage.

You went way off the interpretive rails somewhere. I don't bring up gender differences to pit them against one another in competition, I only bring up physical strength as an easy go-to regarding inherit biological presets for the sake of breaking the legs of social construction- which I have always believed to be an erroneous and catastrophic pursuit. Case in point, if I may make a suggestion- in assuming deep down that men and women are the same, you are unable to view differences between them as anything but a challenge or competition- as competition, at least in the sportsman's sense, typically begins with an even and equal playing field. Something to think about.
 
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I think I’ll keep it simple.

Shaving. It’s tedious. Yet I hate having a beard and frankly I’m not the kind of guy that looks good with one. So I shave- and two days later my face is being used as a nest for finches.

Yes it’s a minor issue but this thread is getting uglier than a leper in a wind tunnel. I figured I’d bring it down a notch. Okay. Goodnight all.
 

Tellenbach

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Not hard at all but you may be asked to cut the tree, kill that bug, take out the trash, fix that leaky faucet, and other manly tasks but that's a small price to pay for control over the remote.
 

Doctor Cringelord

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Not hard at all but you may be asked to cut the tree, kill that bug, take out the trash, fix that leaky faucet, and other manly tasks but that's a small price to pay for control over the remote.

Yours lets you have the remote?
 
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I have no issues with being a man. Mostly just issues that are more related to being easily scared by relationships and people, which would probably worsen if I were a girl and actually had more eyes on me.
 

Yuurei

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How lazy. So because the average woman has less strength than the average man, women in general should be treated as children? How about treating women as adults, in a way that neither panders to the worst in them, nor places undue burdens on men? As others have pointed out, statistical gender differences cut both ways, providing both advantages and disadvantages, depending on the task or situation. Sure, I might call my husband when a task is easier for a large, strong person (though even in machine shop class I never met a power tool I couldn't handle), but when his computer or phone isn't working, he comes running to me. Who, then, has the greater responsibility? Answer: neither, we share. Moreover, no individual is a statistic. It is tiresome and myopic for every discussion of gender to be oversimplified to "men are physically stronger", as if this is the only worthwhile human characteristic. Perhaps men do that because it is the only one where they can claim a statistical advantage.

As a high school girl and disabled person ( Though not to the extent that I am now) I built an entire set by on my own, yes, power tools and all, over night ( Sweeny Todd; two story "House" with each side being a scene. Mechanical chair and all.)
"Why overnight? That's just irresponsible!"
Well, because the boys who had originally made it did an incredibly rushed and shoddy job. The thing LOOKED like a HS set and would have killed anyone who tried to walk on it.like They called my tiny, broken, female ass last-minute specifically because they knew I get could it done right.
I have accomplished quite a few physical feats which were deemed impossible by fewer than three people. Not because I'm lying about my physical state, not because I am THAT awesome, but because my physical weakness has demanded that I adapt-relying on others just doesn't work for me.

It's the same at home. I am the one who puts together IKEA furniture, arranges the storage closet and kills the spiders ect ect. It's more about perseverance and ingenuity than strength. The same applies to humanitie's success as a whole.
 

Bush

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Societal expectations around sucking it up, being tough and all, and not getting too close to other people.

Other than that we've got it pretty damn good.
 

Bush

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Who, then, has the greater responsibility?

Being ultimately responsible for getting most of the big things done. Also liable for those things. Particularly the difficult and dangerous ones. Cost of power.

"I spent my whole life trying not to be careless. Women and children can be careless, but not men." -Vito Corleone
Either way, it comes down to what "big things" means.

A careless mother is going to have a dead child.
 

Doctor Cringelord

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As a high school girl and disabled person ( Though not to the extent that I am now) I built an entire set by on my own, yes, power tools and all, over night ( Sweeny Todd; two story "House" with each side being a scene. Mechanical chair and all.)
"Why overnight? That's just irresponsible!"
Well, because the boys who had originally made it did an incredibly rushed and shoddy job. The thing LOOKED like a HS set and would have killed anyone who tried to walk on it.like They called my tiny, broken, female ass last-minute specifically because they knew I get could it done right.
I have accomplished quite a few physical feats which were deemed impossible by fewer than three people. Not because I'm lying about my physical state, not because I am THAT awesome, but because my physical weakness has demanded that I adapt-relying on others just doesn't work for me.

It's the same at home. I am the one who puts together IKEA furniture, arranges the storage closet and kills the spiders ect ect. It's more about perseverance and ingenuity than strength. The same applies to humanitie's success as a whole.

you know, I wish there were more chicks like you, I really do. My wife can handle her own with tools. I'm glad. It means less chores dumped on me during my time off from work.

When I talk about women who expect coddling and expect men to do the "heavy lifting", you need to realize I don't think that's all women, but being that this is a thread for men to complain or vent about what they consider the harder parts of being men, please don't take it as an attack on women when some of us complain about some things that some, not all women do. Because it's a foregone conclusion that at least some of the harder things women or men deal with will be caused by their dealings with the opposite sex. And yes, I realize some men also play their part in enabling that entitled attitude in some women and thus perpetuating certain roles and stereotypes.

One thing I'd like to add, I don't know if I'd consider it the hardest, but it doesn't always make things easier, is having to worry about being called a misogynist or shamed any time I vent about anything any women do.
 

anticlimatic

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Either way, it comes down to what "big things" means. A careless mother is going to have a dead child.
There is arguably no bigger task in life than ensuring ones offspring don't kill themselves. I feel like women typically bear that burden, and men compensate by being responsible for the next 5 or 10 big things down from that.
 

Doctor Cringelord

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There is arguably no bigger task in life than ensuring ones offspring don't kill themselves. I feel like women typically bear that burden, and men compensate by being responsible for the next 5 or 10 big things down from that.

In addition, it's fair to acknowledge what I think has been referred to as "kin keeping", meaning it's often women in relationships who handle keeping track of social ties and commitments. It's a pretty big responsibility and I think it's easy for the men to overlook or take for granted.
 

Coriolis

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you know, I wish there were more chicks like you, I really do. My wife can handle her own with tools. I'm glad. It means less chores dumped on me during my time off from work.

When I talk about women who expect coddling and expect men to do the "heavy lifting", you need to realize I don't think that's all women, but being that this is a thread for men to complain or vent about what they consider the harder parts of being men, please don't take it as an attack on women when some of us complain about some things that some, not all women do. Because it's a foregone conclusion that at least some of the harder things women or men deal with will be caused by their dealings with the opposite sex. And yes, I realize some men also play their part in enabling that entitled attitude in some womenu and thus perpetuating certain roles and stereotypes.

One thing I'd like to add, I don't know if I'd consider it the hardest, but it doesn't always make things easier, is having to worry about being called a misogynist or shamed any time I vent about anything any women do.
Depends on how you vent. Consider:

"Men have to take responsibiity for things, especially the dirty or dangerous ones because women can't or won't."

vs.

"I often feel I have to take responsibility for things, especially the dirty or dangerous ones, because the women in my life have usually expected it of me."

No one can deny your own experiences or how they make you feel. But they are a poor basis for generalizing about women, men, resposibilities, or other matters, Women who place these demands on men just because they are men are lazy. Men should stop enabling this behavior, however much it may stroke their egos.

In addition, it's fair to acknowledge what I think has been referred to as "kin keeping", meaning it's often women in relationships who handle keeping track of social ties and commitments. It's a pretty big responsibility and I think it's easy for the men to overlook or take for granted.
I avoid this like the plague. It is thankless, fraught with land mines, and brings too little reward for the effort.
 
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