[NF] What do you guys think?: INFP vs. INFJ

[iwakar]

Eh. I'm not stellar at taking care of myself either. :kicks a pebble:

But! I take better care of myself than he does!

 

[The Outsider]

I have people give me "you've got to take better care of your self" lecture all the time. Don't get me wrong, I'm not some kind of skank or something, I just kinda get lost, run out of time, distracted etc. God, I had an ex go grocery shopping for me, because he was horrified, at what he found in my cupboards! (it was along the lines of 1 can of tomatoes and not much else) And I have people cook me food all the time, which is kinda sweet. It's weird, people that know me well get much more worried about my well being, then I am myself. Seriously, I don't think I'm that much of a train wreck. Although I do burn out spectacularly from work. I probably do work too hard.

I don't think INFJ's have the same problem some how...seem much more organised, and more able to fit things into their day.

Haha, this is all so familiar.

 

[Dwigie]

Very good list.

For me it's confusing that separating INFJ and INFP from each other would be difficult... Knowing one, we differ dramatically.

One big difference you can notice firsthand is the communication style:

INFP: There's one of those new grocery shops.
INFJ: Yeah. I saw a commercial on tv.
INFP: Are you hungry ?
INFJ: Not really. Why?
INFP: Just thought if you might be.
INFJ: Have you eaten anything today?
INFP: No.
INFJ: Do you want to go and buy something from the store?
INFP: Okay.

The way INFPs communicate seems so devious to me It'd take a lot of energy to formulate my communation that way... INFJs are more "take-charge" type and want to be direct (and would want others to be too). You can also notice it in the way the two types speak: INFPs have very soft, almost dream-like, monotonic speech pattern, whereas INFJs can talk with their enthusiasm, speaking faster than even their minds could handle.

INFPs usually look more elegant and their expressions are controlled, they have this almost stoic vibe to them. INFJs don't feel their emotions nearly as passionately nor deeply as INFPs, but you can read their emotional states from their faces and gestures.

INFPs are very private individuals, one of the most self-sacrificing type out there. They think in terms of good and bad and are over-the-top perfectionistic. INFPs don't share their innermost hurts with anyone, they can be excellent councelors to others but they themselves solve their feelings and thoughts best alone.

INFJs on the other hand can talk to the people they feel are worthy of that trust about stuff that bothers them and it helps the INFJ to solve their dilemmas by talking them through. Not talking about their issues will make INFJ ill.

INFPs don't pay much attention to their physical states: they may not notice they're hungry or needed to use the toilet or have a stomach ache etc. INFJs are almost hypocondric compared to INFPs: INFJs are very well aware of their physical conditions.

These are a few just more of a behavioural differences I've noticed.

Psh, yeah.

 

[BlackCat]

"INFJs on the other hand can talk to the people they feel are worthy of that trust about stuff that bothers them and it helps the INFJ to solve their dilemmas by talking them through. Not talking about their issues will make INFJ ill."

The trick is making your INFP friend this person. It's win win, the INFP feels good for being able to help and the INFJ feels good for being able to talk to someone. As mentioned in the INFP-INFJ friendship thread INFPs often feel like they don't contribute much to the relationship.

 

[something boring]

God, I had an ex go grocery shopping for me, because he was horrified, at what he found in my cupboards! (it was along the lines of 1 can of tomatoes and not much else)

So I guess the fact that I have a very accurate mental inventory of food and supplies in my house would be a "j" trait...

 

[the state i am in]

So does Fi seem like deeper feeling to you? I always thought Fe was because I can barely withstand the force of it in EXFJs and wonder how they can it themselves. Then again discussing Fi vs Fe in INFXs is rather interesting because depending on which system you're partial to, INFJ could be the one with Fi as one of the two leading functions, or INFP.

i do feel that Fi seems like deeper feeling. i don't have it internally. i'm not the one making it. i feel like i just absorb it from the world and it gets amplified and ricocheted off in any number of directions. and this seems like an idiotic way of looking at it, bc all feeling has to come from relationships outside of you existent in the world. nevertheless they believe and hear something internally that sounds like feeling, i can only recognize what is trapped intside of me, what is my own, by looking at what is around me and naming/describing it. and it is as if i am trying to get rid of it, but their feeling just keeps accumulating and being transformed into something else or being sweated out and suffered thru until it is clean.

what do you mean, which system?

somewhat relatedly, if i read j vs p, i am totally unsure of which i identify with more strongly. with that said, i identify with the type description of infj wholeheartedly, although my Ti is pretty strongly developed so for a while i thought i was an intp. nowadays tho, i feel Ni Fe Ti all the way.

 

[CrystalViolet]

So I guess the fact that I have a very accurate mental inventory of food and supplies in my house would be a "j" trait...

LOL, Yeah probably as it's a bit pot luck with me. I have no idea.

 

[nanook]

at first i loved this presentation, because it totally matches definitions of functions, and therefore works without any J/P crap and can easily translated to socioncs by switching J/P

infp=FiNe
infj=NiFe

at second glimpse, I found some lines, that don't ring that true or are too ambiguous.

the boldfaced black lines are very true and important and clean (not ambiguous) to my eyes.

"italics" means unclean.


INFPs focus on values.
INFJs value their focus.

INFPs invoke their feelings.
INFJs feel their invocations.

INFPs use their intuition to validate their feelings. so feelings come first, also this type will invoke intuitive scenarios that make him feel a wanted feeling, like a ritual for instance
INFJs use their feelings to validate their intuitions. evaluate is a better word, also Fe is selective about ideas. validation is really a task of perception it self. also Te tries to come up with different interpretations of intuition, which are also evaluated by Fe

INFPs react with strong emotions.
INFJs have strong reactions to emotions.

INFPs know what it could be. - cant tell what it's not, and knows it. does not believe that other people can tell.
INFJs know what it couldn’t be. NiFe is very speculative, but also quickly dismissive

INFPs use emotional currency. ambigous, could be understood as Fe
INFJs use their emotions currently. huh?

INFPs don’t know when to quit, and tend to jump out.
INFJs don’t know where to start, and tend to jump in. totally depends on what we are talking about. if we are talking about the symbiotic relationshioship, then Fe does not know when to quit. may be true in other situations

INFPs strive to nurture those around them.
INFJs nurture those around them to strive.
abmigous or even mixed up.

INFPs know where it begins. see the option, when multiple processes come together
INFJs know where it ends. predict the death of a singular process

INFPs are highly aware of their feelings.
INFJs feel they are highly aware.

INFPs figure it out by thinking about it too much.
INFJs figure it out by not thinking about it at all. nice try .... NiFe is never done thinking about what it sees, but yes it tends to "see" things for the most parts.

INFPs have trouble expressing their feelings, but not showing their emotions. Fi: (unless they are too ashamed)
INFJs have trouble showing their emotions, but not expressing their feelings.
Fe: have trouble knowing their emotions, or interpreting them as something "own". can express why "something makes" them feel that way.

INFPs tell about something someone they know did.
INFJs tell someone about something they know they did.

INFPs come to feel your emotions with you.
INFJs feel the emotions coming from you.

INFPs open up to harmony.
INFJs need harmony to open up.

 

[Apollanaut]

INFJs on the other hand can talk to the people they feel are worthy of that trust about stuff that bothers them and it helps the INFJ to solve their dilemmas by talking them through. Not talking about their issues will make INFJ ill.

INFPs don't pay much attention to their physical states: they may not notice they're hungry or needed to use the toilet or have a stomach ache etc. INFJs are almost hypocondric compared to INFPs: INFJs are very well aware of their physical conditions.

So true! Right now I have a mild headache, a sore back, a full stomach (having just had a snack), and a tingly nose 'cos my allergies are playing up! I keep painkillers and antihistamines in my bag "just in case". I put it down to inferior Sensing (both Se and Si) which causes me to be super-sensitive to my physical body.

However, if I get really caught up in Ni-obsessiveness I can ignore my body's needs for long periods - but then pay a heavy price when it wears off and I suddenly notice how hungry/tired/sore I am.

 

[Giggly]

Enlightening!

 

[murkrow]

INFPs know what it could be.
INFJs know what it couldn’t be.

clarify?

 

[Lucifer]

Is the INFP vs. INFJ a question ?
If that is so then INFJ.

 

[GirlFromMars]

That list definitely relates to me very well.

 

[Thessaly]

My ex was an INFJ and we were incredibly similar. I think the main difference we had were that my compassion was extended to all humanity whereas his was limited to his close relations. Also I was more imaginative, creative, and spontaneous than him, while he was more financially and emotionally pragmatic than me.

 

[SuperFob]

INFJs have a harder time being happy, as they are more prone to zero in on the one bad thing that is keeping everything from being 100% harmonious.

My life summed up in one sentence.

 

[Lux]

Thanks, excellent post. It was accurate for me.

 

[Nyx]

Thanks for sharing that post. I consider most of those to be pretty true to my experience.

It suggests that an INFJ is just an INFP turned inside out (or vice versa if you wanna be annoying about it ).



Very true. In my experience, this leads to a tendency for INFPs to be optimists and INFJs to be pessimists. Your thoughts?



True. INFJs will talk about pretty much anything you ask them, but you gotta get to layer 3 or 4 before you can see them express much.



Nice.



Very true.

I agree, and as Lauren Ashley said, I am a pessimistic idealist.

Very good list.

For me it's confusing that separating INFJ and INFP from each other would be difficult... Knowing one, we differ dramatically.

One big difference you can notice firsthand is the communication style:

INFP: There's one of those new grocery shops.
INFJ: Yeah. I saw a commercial on tv.
INFP: Are you hungry ?
INFJ: Not really. Why?
INFP: Just thought if you might be.
INFJ: Have you eaten anything today?
INFP: No.
INFJ: Do you want to go and buy something from the store?
INFP: Okay.

The way INFPs communicate seems so devious to me It'd take a lot of energy to formulate my communation that way... INFJs are more "take-charge" type and want to be direct (and would want others to be too). You can also notice it in the way the two types speak: INFPs have very soft, almost dream-like, monotonic speech pattern, whereas INFJs can talk with their enthusiasm, speaking faster than even their minds could handle.

INFPs usually look more elegant and their expressions are controlled, they have this almost stoic vibe to them. INFJs don't feel their emotions nearly as passionately nor deeply as INFPs, but you can read their emotional states from their faces and gestures.

INFPs are very private individuals, one of the most self-sacrificing type out there. They think in terms of good and bad and are over-the-top perfectionistic. INFPs don't share their innermost hurts with anyone, they can be excellent councelors to others but they themselves solve their feelings and thoughts best alone.

INFJs on the other hand can talk to the people they feel are worthy of that trust about stuff that bothers them and it helps the INFJ to solve their dilemmas by talking them through. Not talking about their issues will make INFJ ill.

INFPs don't pay much attention to their physical states: they may not notice they're hungry or needed to use the toilet or have a stomach ache etc. INFJs are almost hypocondric compared to INFPs: INFJs are very well aware of their physical conditions.

These are a few just more of a behavioural differences I've noticed.

This is very accurate. Except for the part about INFJs not feeling as deeply. I think we can both feel equally deeply, but in different ways.

I definitely agree about talking with enthusiasm and having to talk about problems with my trusted people. I must do this to sort out my dilemmas or I might go crazy. I will admit I also have a tendency to be a bit of a hypochondriac ...



Do any INFJs find relationships with INFPs a little tense (I suppose more so when the INFP is mentally unhealthy)? I think it is that whole inside out thing...

 

[Orangey]

Do any INFJs find relationships with INFPs a little tense (I suppose more so when the INFP is mentally unhealthy)? I think it is that whole inside out thing...

I'd be interested in hearing about why you think so...perhaps some personal examples?

 

[simulatedworld]

This is mostly accurate...

INFP and INFJ typically do NOT get along well, in my experience.

I have one band with 5 people where 4 of us each represent one of the four xNxP types, and then the fifth guy is INFJ...so he's already at odds with our perspectives on that point.

Nonetheless, he tends to get along ok with all of us except the INFP! They clash like hell.

The key difference, I think, is that the INFP's Fi views ethics as an end unto itself...INFPs wish to possess the most internally consistent ethical viewpoint because that is the end goal.

INFJ's Ni views ethics as a means to an end, though, and INFPs find that disingenuous and rather disturbing. (In truth, INFJ's dominant Ni makes him much more similar to an INTJ than to an INFP...note how well INTJ and INFJ tend to see eye to eye, but this is not true of INFJ/INFP or of INTJ/INTP. Another example of J/P being the biggest difference!)

I find that the type that shares your first three letters but not the last one tends to be one of the hardest to get along with in general...has anyone else noticed that?

 

[Glycerine]

^I sometimes can clash w/ ENFPs. I can find some of them to be a bit too loud, overbearing and obnoxious while they can find me to be a bit of a tight wad, rigid, and too reserved. However, I think there are many other things influencing this like the enneagram. I am a 9w1 ENFJ (there always seems to be a struggle between the In-Charge style and the e9wl) which can clash with the common 7w8 ENFP.

DISCLAIMER: I am not talking about ENFPs as a whole but based on some experiences. No one type is better than another and for all we know, this system may be completely bunk with no validity in it. Hopefully, all the bases are covered.