Backgound
1. What is your personality type?
Definitely ENTP for the last five years at least, though childhood and early teens were very stereotypically INTP-ish.
2. Are you male or female?
Um... well I'm male
now, but I was born and raised as a girl, lived as one up to six years ago when I changed sex. I was
never happy as a girl, as far back as my living memory goes, and I could never fit in with other girls. I always hung out with boys and found it easier to be accepted with them.
3. What country do you live in now? What country are you born in?
England now, born in France where I lived up to age 8 and have zipped back and forth between England and France since then, but mostly living in England.
4. What cultural background are you?
Not sure what you mean about this... French and English I guess...? Rural childhood, urban teenage years and adulthood's been mostly spent in the suburbs of a small town. Oh, I guess it might count as cultural background that my dad was a self-sufficiency fanatic, and so we lived in derelict hovels most of my childhood, where we had to provide and do
everything for ourselves, e.g. making bread from scratch (planting the grain, harvesting, milling flour, etc), thatching the roof, milking goats, slaughtering pigs and chickens etc., and it might also count that I had no access to TV or radio until I was about 9, and up to and beyond then I kind of raised myself on medieval literature that an uncle used to bring over for me (he was a professor of medieval studies).
5. What religion are you? What religion is your family?
I'm a Liberal Anglo-Catholic, but I spent years as a Muslim from my late teens until about 4 years ago, and was raised in a combination of Jehovah's Witnesses and just non-religiousness. The vast majority of my family is non-religious and many of them are very hostile towards religion, mainly because of the way my Dad so fanatically enforced JW stuff onto us all.
Questions
6. What career are you in or looking to be in? What are you doing right now to help you achieve this career goal?
I've worked as a freelance, self-employed translator since I was 16, which has been my main bread-winner, though I've gathered more languages under my belt as time's gone on and diversified into ancient ones, plus transcription of manuscripts, deciphering etc., as well as research. I've always loved my job, though what I wanted to do as a kid was to be a monk, and it's what I plan to do when my kids grow up and leave home. Towards that end I'm involved in tonnes of voluntary ministries for and in the Church of England, gaining experience and working on myself to be prepared for that time, whilst investing in my children's futures to ensure they'll be able to manage financially without me being able to bail them out as I'll have to renounce all property, though I'm not entering an enclosed community and can freely see them and have them to stay anytime.
7. What is your friendships like with both genders? How many good friends do you have and why are you friends with these people?
When I lived as a woman I was only ever bullied and teased by women, but got along well with men and most boys. As a man, I get along well with almost everyone, except very stuffy/prim women or sorta 'burly', red-neck type men. I have quite a large social circle, several different groups, some of whom overlap but a lot of them don't know each other, and many only do through me. I guess to begin with I just chat with anyone who's friendly and open, but if someone can really carry their side of a conversation and if they're adventurous and open-minded then I tend to be attracted to them (but not romantically) and so just find ways to see more of them until we become friends. As for very close friends, probably about 4 or 5 who are like family (well, not like
my family, but like family should be!) to me. I find myself attracted to powerful and energetic people because most of the time I'm the one carrying everyone else along on my energy, so it's nice to actually not have to do that sometimes and to even feel like I'm the one being swept along!
8. What paranoias do you have?
Um, dunno, I don't really think I have any... I mean if I did, then I'd think they were perfectly logical, wouldn't I, and I wouldn't see them as paranoias. Though... I guess I find it impossible to trust people of my generation to actually commit truly to relationships and not leave when the fireworks die down, and I also find it impossible to trust most people with secrets, especially women (from bitter experience). I used to be very trusting but since some very nasty experiences I've learned to play my cards pretty close to my chest and keep my own counsel when it comes to secrets.
9. What are your vices?
Anger and alcohol. When very stressed, both become a severe risk and can cause implosion or explosion at undeserving targets.
10. What are your fears?
Claustrophobia, very acute. Used to be arachnaphobic but it doesn't seem to bother me any more. Abandonment - which obviously comes from having been abandoned by my mother and step-dad on my 12th birthday. I just assume that anyone will abandon me at some point, and so never even consider getting attached to them.
11. What is your relationship like with your parents? siblings (if you had any)?
Dad (ISTP) - had Asperger's, very stormy relationship. When he wasn't beating me with a large iron wrench or shoving the Bible down my throat, he sometimes said/did things that made me think he really did care. Always meant to patch things up with him as an adult, but just took too long getting over everything and never felt quite ready, then he died earlier this year.
Mother (ESFx) - just no relationship really. I never remember relating to her, or her understanding me or hugging me or ever being interested in me, or me in her. It was almost as though she didn't exist. She left Dad when I was 9 and took my 2 little sisters to live with her and her new boyfriend who became my step-dad (ISTP), leaving me in a derelict house with the maniac! Then after I came to live with them, their house got reposessed and they moved 150 miles away with my little sisters while I was at school on my 12th birthday, so I came home to an empty house and just no sign of anyone. Never had much to say to step-dad either. Walked the 17 miles to my dad's house that day I was abandoned and ended up living with him for a year alone, in absolute hell, with no communication at all from mother before she turned up suddenly one day and took me back to live with her so she could be entitled to a bigger house on the state welfare housing system. Then spent the rest of the time ignored until and after I left home.
Oldest sister (ESFP) - no relationship to speak of, except that I had little respect or liking for her.
Older brother (ENFP) - good relationship, but 6 years older than me, we didn't live together at all from when I was about 8 as he left to live with his best friend's family. But we've always had an easy relationship when we've been back in touch, and this year have become much closer following Dad's funeral etc and bonded over clearing his estate.
Younger sister (ESFJ) - closest to me in age, raised as though twins virtually, but she was very different to me. Very manipulative and spoilt, always mother's favourite. Went our separate ways when I left home, but we're mostly on speaking terms.
Youngest sister (ENFJ) - 7 years younger than me, so relationship semi-uncle-like as I also didn't live with her for that long, as I left home at 15.
Well, you asked!!
12. How are you with expressing emotion in public?
Happy emotion - fine, no problem. Very exuberant and expressive. Angry emotion - sort of fine, but restrained. Sadness/sorrow/hurt/pain - impossible, no can do.
13. How do you think people saw you in high school? How do you think people see you now?
I was without doubt a geek and very unpopular at school, and constantly bullied. Entire days went by when I didn't even say a single word except 'here' during roll call. People used to describe me as 'clever' and 'brainy'. Much has changed! I mostly get told now that I come across as confident, chaotic (in the roleplaying sense of opposite to lawful), friendly and generous.
And finally....
14. What do you see as the point to your life and life in general?
Nope, can't answer that in a single paragraph... haha! Closest I can get would be... hm... to reach a level of closeness to God wherein my will merges with his, so that I spend my entire time doing only his work, to wit: show, demonstrate and
be the love, joy and peace that he is, to the people I know and meet, and bring it to whatever I participate in. I said it's the point, I didn't claim that I've achieved it!
I don't understand this question. Did I just not answer this above?
Awesome quote. Utterly awesome.
