But how the hell can I, as in, ME, BlackCat, Chris, get better at this that you Extroverts are naturally good at? Explaining what you do with introverts as your natural extrovert self doesn't help.
I need some instruction, or pointers, just generally extrovert traits that I can learn to use occasionally. Something.
Well... keep in mind not 'all' extroverts are 'naturally' good in ALL forms of socialization. ENTX's especially may have slight issues here.
From my own perspective, I sadly can't offer instruction or pointers, because half the time I really don't fit in properly, and the other half it's such a natural thing that I have no clue how I actually pull it off.
One thing I've learned, is that if I'm in a group (let's use the vent channel for the forum for an example), then I'll generally try to force myself into a conversation by latching onto things other people say at first. If it's something I'm naturally interested in, this generally lets me slide in seamlessly with little issue. If it's just idle banter and nothing of much importance, perhaps just being silly, it's 50/50, sometimes it'll work, depending on the humour styles of people present, and sometimes it'll flop horribly, it'll seem obviously forced, and people will just get annoyed at it. It's pretty much random since it's based on the group, and there's not much control one has over that.
Generally I (and probably most NT's) tend to stick to things that directly interest me. I'm sure there's at least some sort of personality type that just LOVES to be in the center of attention regardless of whot it is, and they seriously don't care as long as they get an opportunity to jump into the middle of the conversation. I have no clue which personality type this is, but it'd definately be an E, probably an NF? I'm honestly not sure, I haven't quite mastered the whole 'memorize the letters and whot they mean' thing to the degree many here have XD In time, give it a month or two, I'm sure it'll come naturally then (though technically not since it wasn't a natural thing to just innately know but meh technicalities abound). Regardless, I'm sure that there are those who just swarm into conversation, no matter whot. But not everyone of the E's does so.
I think the biggest thing, is the ability to display false confidence when crowded, some people back off and hide when confronted with a social situation, others eagerly leap into it, and some like to 'hide in plain sight', by being in the middle of things in such a way that noone even really notices them. I'm somewheres between the first and last of that, as it'll swap randomly depending on the situation, and sometimes even within the same situation if one doesn't seem to be working so well.
Yeur best bet for working yeur way into a conversation, is to drop all pretense of worrying about whot people will think of yeu, and then leap into it whether it's a good idea or not. This can often cause yeu to get knocked back on yeur butt at times, but it's often the only way to get into a conversation. Run headfirst until yeu've got yeur foot in the door and there yeu are. From there, it's easy to continue, it's just that starting bit that's rough.
The biggest thing there is to keep track of where the ideal times to sneak into it are, it's easier to work yeur way in when it's not obvious, rather than being overly overt on the matter. That's a matter of practice, and a great deal of ability to sense how the group makeup meshes, and which conversation parts yeu're most adept at fitting in with. Easiest way I've found is to wait until I see something I just HAVE to reply to, and jump in then with my thoughts; if yeu wait too long though, the moment will be lost and it won't work, so being able to interject into a conversation, or type quickly helps. Personally, I type exceptionally fast, so online it's very easy for me, in person, I will never talk over anyone EVER so if they don't stop for breath, I will never be able to enter a conversation and will be stuck just listening, waiting for a free chance and it'll never show. If people pause to think though frequently, it's quite easy to slip in at that time.
I'm not sure how much that helps, but I hope it does to at least some small degree.