[SJ] SJ's, How do you fight?

[Malice]

Oh no, you didn't. Some bitch crossed the line and now it's time to throw down. As an SJ what is your typical course of action when someone has outright insulted you or someone you care about?

 

[Patches]

Stare at the ground, don't make eye contact, walk away.

 

[mrcockburn]

Until they're paralyzed, permanently disabled or disfigured. Or comatose. Just not dead, otherwise you risk going to hell if there's really a god.

 

[Saslou]

Don't anyone dare hurt someone i care about.

I'll let you throw the first punch because that way i'll see red. Then unless someone is holding me back, i'm going to beat your ass with my fist. I'm no pussy fighter, i'm from the hood, lol.

Edit - I am trying to be serious.

 

[Malice]

I know what you mean Saslou, I'm quite similar when it comes to protecting the people I care about.

I made this thread to illustrate that SJ's aren't wussed out over emotional doormats. We put a lot into our relationships, romantic or otherwise, and we're absolutely prepared to stand tall and do what's necessary to defend them when challenged. Also, I thought it might be useful to other types to read how we handle conflict either directly or indirectly when our buttons are pushed.

That being said, here's typically how a fight with me plays out when I feel personally offended/insulted:

1. Something's said I don't agree with.
2. I react. Usually by flat out telling the person I don't agree/that's a dick move/sometimes I get short with my words.
3. Arguments (sometimes heated arguments) ensue.
4. I usually need about an hour or so to cool off. Come back to the argument, and try to work things out when I'm less hot-headed about the issue.

 

[Patches]

I made this thread to illustrate that SJ's aren't wussed out over emotional doormats.

I would be more inclined to call someone who feels the need to throw punches over-emotional than to call someone who "wusses out" over-emotional. That's what fighting seems like to me. Lack of control over emotions.

That being said, my response isn't entirely based on "emotional control" but also the understanding that... I am just not built for fighting. I'm not a physically threatening person. I'm a 5-foot-nothing weakling, not athletic at all. I've been plowed over by a 15-year-old before and couldn't manage to hold my ground. I've been in fights with girls my own age when I was in highschool, and they kicked my ass. For me, pacifism is just a product of being realistic. If I start fights, I'm going to lose. I don't really entertain delusions that I would even be capable of 'defending my loved one's honor' in such a situation.

If I were a stronger/more athletic person my response might be be different, but I am not.

 

[Haven]

Ideally you would not see it coming or even know what was happening. Strength and size are not my thing, so I try to make up for it with extra crazy. I do everything I can to prevent physical conflict. In most cases, just the right amount of trash talking and social maneuvering gets the job done, and can eliminate the threat from people of greater size and influence than I. That's all very exhausting and stressful though, I just wish we could all be friends

 

[Malice]

I just wish we could all be friends

 

[Giggly]

Don't anyone dare hurt someone i care about.

I'll let you throw the first punch because that way i'll see red. Then unless someone is holding me back, i'm going to beat your ass with my fist. I'm no pussy fighter, i'm from the hood, lol.

Hi Sarah. lol

Sarah Conner - the ultimate pissed off ISFJ.

 

[Habba]

As an SJ what is your typical course of action when someone has outright insulted you or someone you care about?

Just ignore them, or give them an ultimatum. "Shut your face or get out of here."

I don't start fights, but I do try to finish them.

If it really got into a fist fight, I'd use my feet to run (since the other guy might just as well have a concealed knife). If it's not an option (no way out, or I'm with someone who couldn't escape), I'd throw myself in fiercely with all the SJ-rage there is. And if you have ever seen an angry SJ, you know Hulk is SJ.

Having played football (=european football) as a full back, I've learnt how to deal with physically stronger people. At least I like to think so...

Which actually reminds me of one heated match we had a while back... after the match had ended, one of the opponent game to one of our player threatening to beat him up (he really is a big mouth). I intervened and said "Cut it right there, that doesn't belong to this sport, at all". That seemed to be enough for him as he left. I was also thinking of provoking him by saying "Bring it on then, or shut the fuck up". I was thinking he was just making threats and wouldn have courage to actually hit anyone. And even if he did, I would just have taken that punch to show how much better I am.

 

[uberrogo]

I do everything I can to not fight, but if I have to I take a long time to fight.

1. I just dont get mad quickly enough.
2. I like to do quality moves and will wait for them to mess up.
3. My fights get broken up quickly because of this.

I like to be underhanded about it though.

 

[Cimarron]

I make nasty comments to everything they say. Turn "party pooper" mode up to 11 on the dial. That's about it...

If you mean physical fights, I don't know. Never been in one.

My main philosophy in this situation is not to waste time and energy on stupid stuff or stupid people. If someone cares so much about something that they want to fight me, and I don't care much about that thing, then I let them have it, in most cases. That thing means a lot more to them, apparently.

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

I would be more inclined to call someone who feels the need to throw punches over-emotional than to call someone who "wusses out" over-emotional. That's what fighting seems like to me. Lack of control over emotions.

That being said, my response isn't entirely based on "emotional control" but also the understanding that... I am just not built for fighting. I'm not a physically threatening person. I'm a 5-foot-nothing weakling, not athletic at all. I've been plowed over by a 15-year-old before and couldn't manage to hold my ground. I've been in fights with girls my own age when I was in highschool, and they kicked my ass. For me, pacifism is just a product of being realistic. If I start fights, I'm going to lose. I don't really entertain delusions that I would even be capable of 'defending my loved one's honor' in such a situation.

If I were a stronger/more athletic person my response might be be different, but I am not.

Your avatar and this post are in perfect harmony.

 

[EJCC]

Oh no, you didn't. Some bitch crossed the line and now it's time to throw down. As an SJ what is your typical course of action when someone has outright insulted you or someone you care about?

I'll react differently if they're insulting me, vs. someone I care about. I think it's easier for me to back down when they're insulting me. They'll make some accusation about me, I'll immediately get defensive, and if they don't back down (i.e. if they absolutely refuse to listen to reason), I'll assume that they can't be reasoned with and I'll give up -- and if I'm especially angry, I'll make sure I have a good zinger to use as the last word before I storm out of the room.

But if they insult my friends, I will argue with them for as long as it takes for them to either change their minds or back the fuck off.

Never, ever, will I raise my voice with them. My arguing will be very testy and with gritted teeth; at most, I'll seem very frustrated, but never full-out raging. And I will never try to fight with them; I will try to change their minds. When I fight, my definition of "victory" isn't just that they're defeated (although that's nice too) -- my definition of "victory" involves the enemy changing sides.

 

[jixmixfix]

Stare at the ground, don't make eye contact, walk away.

pusssyy

 

[Giggly]

Both Patches and I are very small and always got overpowered when we were kids by our older and much bigger siblings. That might have some carry over effect.

 

[Malice]

Apparently I can get pretty dramatic, and I spew a lot of fire and brimstone while I rant and rave.
No surprises there

 

[mavericknm]

Both Patches and I are very small and always got overpowered when we were kids by our older and much bigger siblings. That might have some carry over effect.

I'm 5' 11" and being super jaded and cynical makes me 6'. But I still pretty much walk away from the situation with my head metaphorically down.

I remember really clearly this one time as a child I fought back kind of like Ender's Game. This one big fat kid was pushing my tiny body around on the soccer field. After getting tired of negotiation and trying to tell him to stop and calm down, I started counting his pushing rhythm. It ended with him face forward in the ground behind me. I walked away feeling justified but mostly scared about the excessive force. I've never really felt good about standing ground since.

 

[Elfboy]

I'll react differently if they're insulting me, vs. someone I care about. I think it's easier for me to back down when they're insulting me. They'll make some accusation about me, I'll immediately get defensive, and if they don't back down (i.e. if they absolutely refuse to listen to reason), I'll assume that they can't be reasoned with and I'll give up -- and if I'm especially angry, I'll make sure I have a good zinger to use as the last word before I storm out of the room.

But if they insult my friends, I will argue with them for as long as it takes for them to either change their minds or back the fuck off.

Never, ever, will I raise my voice with them. My arguing will be very testy and with gritted teeth; at most, I'll seem very frustrated, but never full-out raging. And I will never try to fight with them; I will try to change their minds. When I fight, my definition of "victory" isn't just that they're defeated (although that's nice too) -- my definition of "victory" involves the enemy changing sides.

+1 for Inferior Fi

 

[tinker683]

Oh no, you didn't. Some bitch crossed the line and now it's time to throw down. As an SJ what is your typical course of action when someone has outright insulted you or someone you care about?

Truth be told, I haven't been in a fist fight since middle school and even then that was with my older brother. I've been in a lot of confrontations but usually I tend to be more of a mediator for disputes and things like that. People tell me all the time that I have a very calming presence so I guess I'm just well suited for that.

All of that being said, I'll try very hard to avoid a fight if need be. To me it's just a failure for any dispute to have to break down into a fight. If by chance I meet someone who continually harasses me then I'll report said persons to whatever authorities they have to answer too.

I mean, seriously, when I woke up this morning I put on my big-boy pants that said I was going to be a civilized adult so when I meet some assclown I have no issue with telling them that they touch me and I'll files charges of assault and battery against them. Everyone expects me to act like an adult, I don't see why I can't return that courtesy to them as well

Now...how to get me into a fist fight: Physically go after my S.O. or my children. Do that, and you'll need to pray the cops/someone peels me off of you or that you knock me unconscious because I will rip your jaw out and shove it down your throat. I realize this may sound stupidly macho and perhaps even chauvinistic and I don't mean to insult any of the ladies here, but I just have this thing about being a man who protects his woman. It's just how I'm wired but if you go after my woman or my kids then I feel I have every right in the world to smear you into the pavement. Call it nature/personal honor/whatever, I don't really care. It's just who I am.

Of course, seeing as I tend to be attracted to very strong women there's a good chance she'll probably kick his ass looooong before I have a chance too so it may be a moot point