[INFJ] Professionally Confirmed INFJs

[Kingu Kurimuzon]

This is going to be fun to watch unfold. Someone is going to try wreck this thread.

 

[Forever]

I believe I don't fit the criteria for you, however, it was pretty funny how the thread turned out to be like, but you already knew, didn't you?

 

[Kullervo]

The real intent is to foster clarity through accuracy.

I fully expected to receive the criticisms levelled at me here, which is a shame. Suggesting that I want to appear as the 'one true INFJ' is hilarious to me. There are tens of millions of INFJs out there in the big wide world. An INFJ doesn't care about being '''rare''' or special. That is yet another common misconception, largely propagated by mistyped Fi users who do care about individuality. Fe really doesn't.

Boiled down, the difference between Fi vs Fe is whether the person is emotionally focused on the self or on others. This doesn't preclude a Fe user from believing that they are special, their motivations - and the traits that define this uniqueness - are just likely to be a little different. As others have mentioned, a fear of not being unique is more of an Enneagram 4 issue than something specific to an MBTI type.

Many people confuse correlation with causation, and it is worthwhile looking into the Enneagram system to realise how motivations can colour a type.

In my mind, there's nothing remotely cringe-worthy about trying to actively improve the muddied waters of typology; I thank you for your input and concerns, but within this context your post is not productive. Furthermore, I'm not particularly interested in having this discussion. If you dislike the thread, keep out. It's very simple.

Of course not, but the way you worded your OP post sent out very strong vibes to me and others that you assume everybody is mistyped on here, unless they've had their type confirmed by an MBTI professional. You further assume that INFJs who take offence to such a patronising attitude are "proving" that we're mistyped INFPs (even though INFPs have no cognitive functions in common with INFJs). Can you not see, then, how we might not find you and your approach insulting? I guess what I'm saying is, if you act like an arbiter of people's authenticity don't complain if you're criticised. You have shown a lot of poor logic in this thread and some people have already corrected you on aspects of typology.

Nonetheless I owe you an apology for the tone of my first post, because I was more than a little drunk last night. I hope you don't take anything I've typed as a personal slight, and yes, this will be my last comment.

/over

 

[PeaceBaby]

As your sensitivity tastes like Fi.

And you say that like it's a bad thing.

I've decided that this great slur often positioned against Fi is completely embraceable. Yes, I am sensitive, but not the way you might imagine.

Listen, I'll tell you, the greatest gift the forum has given me is knowing that all the hurtful things I can feel behind the words, the things you're saying between the lines, the things I sense about you but I don't want to believe are true, actually mostly are. And that's ok, because I can accept someone like you warts and all; the world is full of people with lots of unkind thoughts in their heads and a smile on their face but that doesn't necessarily make them bad people.

The bigger issue is you being able to accept and see yourself clear. Since you were pretty forthright from the start, perhaps you already do. Just nicer to not candy-coat it; it's still facetious.

My apology stands and is offered with complete sincerity.

Your words had a purpose and your mission was a success. Congratulations! However, even though your words are filled with those messages, I still love and accept you as a human being. Your purpose was uncharitable and part of me wants to give that back to you, but I won't harbor you ill will.

Sincere good luck in your journey!


eta: I was thinking of this while making lunch - you likely are thinking you're only treating me the way you feel you were treated first. But I'm going to point out this:

Your own post sought to deride me in some way

You treated me based on an ASSUMPTION of my intent - you assumed I was looking down on you in some way so felt justified to deliver it right back. Yet, let me clarify my intent for you so you know it crystal-clear: my intent is (ironically) to clear up misinformation about Fi. When I see it, I reply and share information. My post had nothing to do with you personally and was not intended to insult you in any way.

 

[violett]

I really don't understand Fe at all. My decisions are based and have always been based on my own personal values. I don't need a professionally administered Mbti instrument to tell me which functions I use nor a counselor to help me come to a conclusion. That being said, I think its rather unfair to post on a type discussion board "I only want to communicate with other professionally confirmed Infj's" Because in doing so you are automatically discrediting anyone who has made self assessments and accurately determined their own type.

 

[thoughtlost]

...since this thread is already derailed...

1.) I totally understand how this thread can seem discrediting to other people who call themselves INFJ without the aid of a practicioner, but I HOPE the point is NOT to say "YOU'RE WRONG AND YOU'RE NOT AN INFJ!!!" I would hope that point of the thread is to say "Hey let's gather information about people who are typed INFJ by professionals and compare it to people who weren't" ...that would be a slightly more scientific/less judgmental approach wouldn't it?

2.) Sure, he/she should not have said in the OP "I want GOOD and ACCURATE information" ...because just because someone is typed by a practicioner ...it does not mean that the practicioner is right ...especially when WE FOR SURE KNOW that different practicioners can give out different answers. Does that mean that opinion of just anyone is always correct? Of course not, but everyone's opinion does matter and it is useful to see how each person has come to their conclusions.

3.) so basically, practioners CAN be wrong (doesn't mean they ALWAYS will be wrong so their opinions should be included) AND people who type on their own CAN be wrong (does not mean that they will ALWAYS be wrong ...so their opinions should be included). It doesn't matter who decided to place the label on the person... I think it is fair to think that NOT everyone who is wearing that label to be called an INFJ ...just like not everyone who has been typed as INFP by themselves or by others is an INFP. Same thing with ENTP. But yes, I understand how he/she should not have set the standard by saying "only those who have typed themselves by a source ONLY I deam credible will have their opinions taken into consideration"


...and I please beg you to tell me if I am wrong on any account... just do not use sarcasm or be flippant because the message will be lost upon me. Just say directly that I am wrong/misguided/whatever.

 

[Sinmara]

You treated me based on an ASSUMPTION of my intent - you assumed I was looking down on you in some way so felt justified to deliver it right back.

Mmm, tastes like Ni+Fe.

To [MENTION=13310]pmj85[/MENTION], I'm afraid the best I have for you is that a friend, who is a psychologist and studied MBTI (and Big 5) extensively, told me that I am INFJ. I already knew this, but had not discuss my type with him previously. As others have mentioned, the professionals you require are difficult to come by and money is an issue for most people these days.

 

[chickpea]

I'd tell someone they were an INFJ if that's what they wanted to hear and they were paying me.

omg.. your Ni is so huge. I've never seen such a big, beautiful Ni in my whole life.

 

[á´…eparted]

Well now, I haven't seen such a head-up-ones-ass narcissistic topic like this in ages! It's quite lovely when there blissfully unaware of it too. Oh, this takes me back...

 

[uumlau]

You'd be surprised how much a non-INFJ might be able to tell you about INFJs, just based on exposure and experience.

The topic of MBTI came up with a psychologist friend of mine, and she said she didn't remember what her type was. I told her "INFJ". Later on she took a test and was clearly INFJ. Then she went and read a few descriptions around the web, and was surprised how well it had described her. She had already been exposed to personality inventories and had strongly considered research of one of the SLOAN dichotomies (agreeableness), but seeing something like this describe her and how she had felt for most of her life.

And she was even more amazed as I described her thought processes to her in detail, both conscious and unconscious, and how they interacted within herself and with others (using a few helpful doses of type dynamics from Quenk). I'm afraid I shouldn't reveal specifics, as lots of personal topics came up, but it was remarkably helpful for her. She ended up telling her friends and family about it and started having them all take the MBTI. (Being a psychologist makes the subject doubly fascinating for her.)

Anyway, I wish you luck with your investigations. Try not to get too focused on the words and their definitions, but instead on the patterns as they reveal themselves in human beings. The patterns which repeat from person-to-person are the traits governed by type theory. The primary useful aspect of the patterns is you only need to see bits and pieces of the pattern to know that it's there.

 

[violett]

My 4w5 sister is a speculated and then self confirmed Infj. If you email me I might let her talk to you.

 

[Eilonwy]

@pmj85, you see your first post as a legitimate request, but there are a lot of people who will see it as something else because more information comes through than we are aware of. Not all of the comments you're getting are inane; you just can't see the information that they're based on.

I said I share those INFJ traits because I do. And in the last year or so, I've started being able to see the information that I couldn't see before. It's still very difficult for me to see this information coming from myself, but I can see it coming from other INFJs at times. That's what makes your posts entertaining and enlightening to me--that the information is clearly there, and that you can't see it. It's also entertaining and enlightening to see some traits that seem so consistent that they are almost cliche--like taking conversations private rather than public. I could point out others, but, frankly, I'm tired of hearing myself say this stuff.

Also, depending on what you consider misinformation, it could be entertainingly ironic to see what results you come up with. I do sincerely wish you luck. One never knows what the results will be.

 

[Bush]

By the by, most MBTI practitioners barely scratch the cognitive functions. So if we're talking about practitioner-blessed assessments, JCF is hardly a part of the exercise. A practitioner who blesses someone as an e.g. INFJ or ESTP says very little about how the individual's psyche encompasses e.g. Fe. To delve into JCF as anchored from practitioners' knowledge and assessments is to continue to spread misinformation--or at least misguided or unsubstantiated information.

This is not to be a dick, nor to be accusatory, nor to even lend credence to the veracity of JCF and therefore implying that the whole shebang should be scrapped. Really.

I appreciate any and all efforts to figure out what typology actually means. I think that has to do with properly nailing down each type, function, aspect, etc. I also believe that most the best information about a type can be had "from the horse's mouth." That means that in spreading the best information, then, horses should actually be horses and not zebras believing themselves to be (or being misclassed as) horses, or whatever.

So the questions come back 'round: what determines the veracity of an INFJ typing? Then, what can an accurate INFJ typing actually tell you? Then, you can ask what collective knowledge from a bunch of correctly-typed INFJs would tell you and then have a bunch of good information. Then you can spread it across the whole typologyverse and dispel the Godawful stereotypes, such as that INFJs prefer orange over blue or that they never return phone calls or whatever.

I wouldn't even bother with the groanworthy "back to square one" thinking, but that's where the pushback in this thread is coming from.

 

[Cellmold]

Everyone has their agenda, but the agenda can put you on a bender and when you hit the metaphorical fender no bail out can help...definitely not the money-lender.

But at least you're clear.

 

[Bush]

Everyone has their agenda, but the agenda can put you on a bender and when you hit the metaphorical fender no bail out can help...definitely not the money-lender.

But at least you're clear.

I love this analogy.

Even if I can't figure out what the analog actually is here.

And that mystery makes it even better.

 

[pmj85]

Wow.

So, remember this?

Turns out I'm not an INFJ at all. I am in fact INTJ. Imagine that.

Sorry, everyone. What a stupid and misguided asshole I was

I know there's no need to bump this, but even though you're a bunch of strangers I'll probably never meet... this sort of matters to me. Intellectual integrity and all that. I'd rather out myself as being a misguided twat than let it lie; some people got quite pissed at me for this thread - and rightly so.

How did I figure this out? Well, a few months after posting this utter shite I ended up becoming friends with some genuinely good MBTI practitioners who actually knew their stuff (as opposed to the original individuals I consulted) in both the UK and US. If you'll permit some name-dropping, I even had the pleasure of speaking to Dario Nardi (seriously cool guy) and Linda Berens. However, two people in particular really stood out to me. One of said two is an INTJ 5w4 (yeah, the enneagram is useful - duh); the other is an ENFP who is married to an INTJ. I met the former at a conference and we immediately struck a connection with one another. I later attended one of her seminars and, long story short, she took me under her wing and coached me, took me through different instruments (including Step II, III and Frio B plus others) at which point it became glaringly obvious that I'm as Te as all fuck. I of course argued this point with her for a good few weeks (yeah - arguing with a PhD who has been doing this stuff for years... NT much?) but had to concede eventually as the evidence became overwhelming. Then, the latter (ENFP) was all "Well, I couldn't tell you that you're an INTJ because that isn't how this works... but god damn - you seriously thought you were Fe?!"

I've also run through some things with the ENFP. She's coached me quite a bit, also typed my wife (ENTJ; not ENFJ - what the fuck at my Fe/Te understanding?) and earlier this week she took me through EQ... 2.0? Point being, I'm now far better informed on all of this stuff and a great deal more self-aware.

Part of the process of discovery and networking has also seen me introduced to INFJs who HAVE been professionally confirmed. My word. The contrast!

Such warm.
Many smile.
Incredible personskillâ„¢.

Meanwhile, I'm as grumpy as shit, aloof and socially fucking hopeless. Y'know, all the things you'd expect from an INTJ who is trying to find his way in the world. Fortunately, I'm starting to do just that. Life keeps putting other xNTJs on my path as well, so for the first time ever I actually have people in my life who speak the same language. This in and of itself has made a huge and positive difference.

So, there you have it. I was wrong and a twat. I apologise profusely to all those I pissed off. You were right to be mad at me. Hell, I'm even mad at me.

Have yourselves a lovely weekend... and if you do want to know any more, just reply or PM me etc.

- P

(apologies for the slapdash nature of the post - lots to do / very little time).

 

[Norrsken]

Wow, I need to read the rest of this.

 

[Nico_D]

So...

Wow. My deepest and sincerest respects for that! I don't think I've known anyone who could've done what you just did.

 

[Virgo1987]

This thread is cringeworthy.

You do sound elitist, you're not really even trying to hide it. I'm telling you that for a fact.

I am sorry, but I just feel like I have no choice but to accuse you of having no interest in compiling interest in INFJ as a type. We are all tired of seeing somebody suggest that they're the only true INFJ, and I note that you've gone to a great extent to ensure that nobody can actually fulfil your criteria. For example, while I am sure that a group of people on here will have been typed by a careers advisor or somebody in their business, MBTI practitioners are quite rare creatures in psychometric testing professionally, especially outside the US. This is a small forum where not everybody has money, but you have made it crystal clear that nothing less will suffice. Even if somebody had undergone such testing what would he then have to do? Link you to an interview or give you a certificate?

I really despair when these kinds of threads/comments keep popping up. The real intent behind them is not hard to deduce.

Amen. Complete elitist.

 

[Mole]

There are no professional, qualified, mbti psychologists, because no university in the world qualifies psychologists to practise mbti, any more than no university in the world qualifies anyone to practice astrology.

Both mbti and astrology are fun to play, but contain no truth value.

We are not interested in the truth when we are entranced, and mbti and astrology entrances us so our critical mind goes to sleep and our imaginative mind wakes up.

And our imagination is fun because we can imagine anything, even what isn't true.

But does it matter? Yes, because we are talking about our psyche which guides our life for good or ill. So what is true matters.