Hey! Thanks man, sounds pretty interesting. I'm checking it out after this post. (Edit: Had to find a way to watch it for free, so for anyone else who needs a free version
http://www.zzstream.com/2009/10/lie-to-me-season-2-episode-1-core-of-it.html )
Just going to write a bit more because I initially said I wanted to so I guess I should... I'm not sure what I want to say now though.
I'm very interested in people who are dealing with split personalities, but equally as interested in anyone who feels as though they have frequent fluctuations in personality, behavior, mood etc. Perhaps you are in a transition stage, and re evaluating much of what you have come to be made of. Or maybe you've never really felt sure of anything, and are always on the search for what feels right, and where you might belong. I'm very interested to hear how people handle fluctuation and how it makes them feel. I know sometimes I panic when I am unsure about certain things, especially when it comes to people. I liek to know where I stand with people, and am quite obsessed with honesty, unable to make exceptions for anyone who cannot be honest with me. I am quite rigid about that. I'd liek to know how often people feel tuned into the chaos of it all and what their experience of that is like, if it's scary or exciting to them.
In general I think people mostly have fluent reliable reactions and approaches to the world, which can change gradually over time as the person adjusts and learns.
Some people have different modes, depending on their environments or the people they are with, and whilst is may be customary for someone to practice good manners and be courteous of others in 1 setting, in an other less formal setting that person might be less conscientious.
People are always within the realm of flux, as nature is flux/change. We try our best to remain steadfast pillars of reliability because it serves us on so many levels to be reliable, to ourselves, to others, systems that need maintenance, anything that requires pattern to be sustained. Whilst stability is natural, healthy and productive on most any level, human beings have allot of issues with change and obsess over stability to the point where we are deeply ill-prepared for the day to day nature of reality, which IS change. We FIGHT against change in order to retain certainty and stay in possession. It makes sense as stability offers us allot of breathing space and comfort; if we can rely on something to sustain us that therefore ensures us further survival. It's all very natural to WANT set rules and boundaries on ourselves and our idea's. I mean, If I change my mind too much I can't settle on any one thing and I can't begin to get anything done! There is much logic in stability.
We often hide from flux, try to downplay our fighting tooth and nail against it.
So, anyone who is not stable in their mentality has allot to answer for to other people, they might be deemed unreliable and even dangerous.
I think [mental] instability is just as natural as [mental] stability though, it's just the less preferred option. We need mental instability or we can't learn, we can't introduce changes into our mind if we fight against change too hard. So we do accept it, we just have allot of rules in which to engage it on..
Some people don't fight the flux at all though, and perhaps those people descend into what would be deemed too far removed to be sanity, but others, when challenged, will immediately hit the breaks, slow down and pull in somewhere so they can be interacted with, and hopefully trusted and understood. However mentally challenging and unusual it is, they will play along for the sake of successful communication and acceptance from fellow man. For example, it might be totally unnatural for someone to hold favor or make judgments, and are thus unable to get involved with an opinion, and when that opinion is required in conversation, or interview, the lack of it could threaten to disconnect the person from the inquiring world. So perhaps in desperation they try to generalize how they feel at the time, and pretend it's their opinion, but then within a unusually short amount of time a new adjustment is made or a new piece of information is introduced which changes that persons mind and outlook, and they can no longer agree with the self that held the previous opinion or outlook. It is not that they do not know themselves, or that they are flakey or false, they are just naturally attuned to the flux, perhaps even obsessively. They might have solid convictions when it comes to morals or ideals, but those morals and ideals are not enough to stabilize reality to it's core, and all other aspects of reality are open to interpretation at any given time. One of their ideals might be that the world should be a more open and uncensored. In that mindset they come to see a multitude of contradicting motives underlying human behavior, and the dishonesty that can come with having to assert oneself and be reliable. They themselves have no justification to maintain opinions and approach.
I think it'd be fair to admit I do not know exactly what I'm trying to say right now... I just hope something I've said has made sense, even if all of this is quite pointless really. Maybe I did have a point.. hm.. my point probably is that nothing is truly set in stone.. fluctuation unsettles us, for obvious reasons, but I think that life really is all about change, and adaptation. Time is measured by change, and if nothing changed everything would be stationary, static, suspended in stasis, possibly darkness, whiteness, JUST nothing (actually, if nothing as a concept had the capacity to change it would become something, but that was a tedious observation to make
). So whilst we balance these two opposing forces, chaos and stability, we are allowed to let go and go with the flow sometimes, to be silly, make mistakes & change our minds. The less comfortable we make it be open, the more pain we feel when we have to face up and adjust to changes. It is ok to not know, and say you don't know, and accept there may never be a knowing in some area. True independence comes at last when we free ourselves from that self which wants us to be and stay a certain way, the self that won't love us for our faults. Our personal endeavor should simply be to accept and love ourself, not to be in the right conditions to be love able or respectable. The right conditions are a healthy respect for you, the human being that is here doing a damn good job at adapting to this chaos. Totally rambling off into space.
going to watch that show now
for those who find this tldr, a summary:
:marionette:
:chicken:
