Mistyping ESFP ? Eveything is possible...

[RedAmazoneFriendZone]

Hello everyone,


I am back here after several trips and numerous changes in my life that led to a certain evolution about my feelings and acceptation.


I have let aside MBTI (je me confesse mes amis ) and would like to know your opinion.

I have done several enneagramm tests and even went to numerous courses. Finally I was thought 7,8, or counterphobic 6 because I have always expressed how I felt authority boring, harassing, and avoid control.

But recently I went to another course and they discovered I may be an INFP Because they found I am more creative than rebellious, more sensitive than blunt, more of an idealistic leader (I have created my entreprise 2 years ago but in the esoteric area) than a group lover (I don't feel confortable in groups).



I "had been typed" (that expression makes me laugh, as if this label was extremely important) ESFP because I used to play theatre, but I have never seen myself as "a typical extrovert" and beyond the numerous experiences I am craving for I am rather very much solitary.

So I went for a test in Italy where I am going to live in September and I had in front of me different methods to try to know who the people really are.

Could some INFP and ESFP give me their opinion also about if, in certain stressful occasions to them, they have lost control of their own feelings and cried because they didn't feel supported in important decisions ?

Is it possible to be mistyped because under stress for a long time and how to know about your own type beyond all clichés ?


I have denied my feelings in the past not to suffer and have entered denial many times. I had been suffering of anorexia in my 16/18's and have not always been that creative example for others.
But finally, my sensitivity always come back on the carpet. And I recently felt overwhelmed because I wanted to feel the support of my family. I was myself surprised to react this way even if it wasn't the very first time....

When my brother said "Well it has always been like this in our family, we don't express such and such warm feeling", it was because I said :

"Come on you all, you don't even show any sign of support, you are all asking me questions all at once and no on e is even listening to me, nobody cares."

Then everybody tried to tell me to calm down and I said "Oh yes, go on with you hypocrisie, I don't wanna enter this game, I am not interested at all by denying who I am and what I feel, and now I am the one who isn't normal, I just needed

to ear some kind words, to feel your support, is that too much to ask ? I am not ready to fake anything "

So that kind of rebellious side of mine is generally shown when I criticise society, but I never felt this urge to express this that way, always expressing my feelings in what I write, at the theatre, and to some few very good friends I knwo I can say anything and just be myself, happy, authentic as always.

So yes my question directed to the Mbti users is : That "borderline aspect" in stressful times is it more "np" or "sp" ?


To be in the box of sp or nf isn't what matters to me, but what is important is to understand my feelings and how they sometimes take such or such shape in the world. Also, I'd like to understand other experiences about you,

particularly if you have been living what I call "borderline rebellions" (you can express to others they don't understand you or that they are insensitive _ which is of course craving for authenticity).

Merci ! :hi:

 

[Betty Blue]

Careers themselves are not particularly type related though you may find some types attracted in swathes to certain areas. Plenty of INFP's in theatre, it's more the way we cognitively interact with our chosen field than what that chosen field is.

That being said INFP's tend not to express their inner feelings to others so bluntly and usually carry the weight internally or express it in less decipherable ways. It is often the case with ESFP's that they surprise others by bluntly expressing they feel misunderstood when in crisis. I too would be interested to hear if other INFP's have expressed they feel misunderstood to family members as it's not something I have come across before.

The group interaction comments are interesting, I would usually expect extroverts to feel comfortable in at least small groups, and even a fair few introverts.

So I suppose i'd like to ask, what does theatre mean to you? What does family mean to you? What are your long term goals?

 

[RedAmazoneFriendZone]

Betty Blue is the name of the personnage in the movie of the same title with Beatrice Dalle. Called in french 37°2. Beautiful movie with indeed a character that is totally borderline (she has 9 traits on 10 about the diagnostic)

To answer your questions theatre means (or meant because I decided to let down my last group because they didn't ask me anything when a play was given to me, how I felt was left aside so I decided to leave everybody 15 days before the show)
being able to express different feelings, even the ones I don't feel confortable with, and become more at ease and familiar with them. So more confident in myself. It also means sharing with other people, but I still feel the look of others on me
as a trap. I am sensitive to judgement, and I'm quite perfectionist.

On stage nobody is suppose to judge as we are not there for being destroyed but to express ourselves, sometimes in a play (or let's say an incarnation) that will make you discover a facette of yourself you ignored until here.

That is what I like the most. Exploring. And working in depth on an emotion to make it alive at your best.

Family used to mean conflicts and feeling trapped, misunderstanding and pain. When I was a kid I felt as if I always had to be strong and deny my own emotions. I suppose it was only one of the many parental messages I received and my ego selected this one. I think it has something to do with my mother's fears. She wanted a girl, and a girl that would survive and not be afraid and anxious (as she used to be). So I understood quite early the why and when, what happened in my story and I don't judge their behaviours that have seemed unfair to me for long (until I left home and beyond that...). Everybody does what he/she can. We are all awkward with emotions in my family because quite emotional (I think they are all F types) and finally they became quite "taboo", which should normally be the contrary (in my own good sense that's what I think !). So instead of feeling that pain of emotions I prefer to transform them, most of the time, and sometimes I explode because I have too much to wear on my shoulders (and mainly in my head). Mainly as I work with people all day explaining to me their problems (that I love to take in charge, solve, analyse and always push things and, by listening and explaining things in my own view, to find solutions and give hope) I sometimes need to...listen to mines as well . Or should I say I need to listen to myself to be able to work with people. that seems more logical on a human and efficient point of view.

"Help yourself and the sky will save you", is that correct ? "Aide-toi et le ciel t'aidera."

My long term goals are to develop myself in the area I chose (well-being, therapy, energies, spirituality but also languages as I will move again to another country).
I don't seem to plan things unless I feel passionate. I can't really explain my choices sometimes (the worse thing is to ask me to be "rational", that makes me laugh, because...it has no sense !). I just feel my intuitions and follow it.
And in my own experiments it works pretty good

How about you ? Merci for the answer !

 

[Betty Blue]

Betty Blue is the name of the personnage in the movie of the same title with Beatrice Dalle. Called in french 37°2. Beautiful movie with indeed a character that is totally borderline (she has 9 traits on 10 about the diagnostic)

To answer your questions theatre means (or meant because I decided to let down my last group because they didn't ask me anything when a play was given to me, how I felt was left aside so I decided to leave everybody 15 days before the show)
being able to express different feelings, even the ones I don't feel confortable with, and become more at ease and familiar with them. So more confident in myself. It also means sharing with other people, but I still feel the look of others on me
as a trap. I am sensitive to judgement, and I'm quite perfectionist.

On stage nobody is suppose to judge as we are not there for being destroyed but to express ourselves, sometimes in a play (or let's say an incarnation) that will make you discover a facette of yourself you ignored until here.

That is what I like the most. Exploring. And working in depth on an emotion to make it alive at your best.

Family used to mean conflicts and feeling trapped, misunderstanding and pain. When I was a kid I felt as if I always had to be strong and deny my own emotions. I suppose it was only one of the many parental messages I received and my ego selected this one. I think it has something to do with my mother's fears. She wanted a girl, and a girl that would survive and not be afraid and anxious (as she used to be). So I understood quite early the why and when, what happened in my story and I don't judge their behaviours that have seemed unfair to me for long (until I left home and beyond that...). Everybody does what he/she can. We are all awkward with emotions in my family because quite emotional (I think they are all F types) and finally they became quite "taboo", which should normally be the contrary (in my own good sense that's what I think !). So instead of feeling that pain of emotions I prefer to transform them, most of the time, and sometimes I explode because I have too much to wear on my shoulders (and mainly in my head). Mainly as I work with people all day explaining to me their problems (that I love to take in charge, solve, analyse and always push things and, by listening and explaining things in my own view, to find solutions and give hope) I sometimes need to...listen to mines as well . Or should I say I need to listen to myself to be able to work with people. that seems more logical on a human and efficient point of view.

"Help yourself and the sky will save you", is that correct ? "Aide-toi et le ciel t'aidera."

My long term goals are to develop myself in the area I chose (well-being, therapy, energies, spirituality but also languages as I will move again to another country).
I don't seem to plan things unless I feel passionate. I can't really explain my choices sometimes (the worse thing is to ask me to be "rational", that makes me laugh, because...it has no sense !). I just feel my intuitions and follow it.
And in my own experiments it works pretty good

How about you ? Merci for the answer !

From this post Fi is pretty clear, what I am trying to gather is weather it is your primary function or secondary, if it's your primary I could see either INFP or ISFP. Have you looked at the descriptions for ISFP?

How do you deal with conflict?

What are your friendships/relationship like and how do you view them?

p.s I chose the name betty blue for my love of that film, the inner turmoil and exuberance of the character coupled with the despair of not realising potential and a sense of being bigger than life/not fitting in the mould of societal expectation.

 

[RedAmazoneFriendZone]

ISFP no I don't think so, that because a member of my close family is ISFP and I'm pretty sure of that : we are totally different.

For example about conflicts I prefer to tell some truths than to avoid conflicts at any cost (that isn't generally what ISFP do).

My friendships are extremely intense, as well as my ex relationships (maybe sx expressing itself here ?), as well as my future It is not only me who mean it but the person I am in relation with.


I also like the character of Betty Blue but wouldn't like to have her in my house...