[INFJ] INFJs and/or HSPs: Do you get depressed in the wrong kind of job?

[karenk]

If you're in a job that doesn't suit your preferences, do you get depressed? I already didn't like my job and then they moved my cube to an open area. People are behind me and there's a lot more stimuli/less privacy. I think for a hsp this is bad. After just a couple months I'm already depressed. I was also in a job that was a poor fit for me in the past and I continued being depressed months AFTER I left it-like it took time to get over it. Do others have this difficulty and how do you cope/deal with it?

 

[tenINsFJ]

I worked at the Attorney Generals Office of CA for a year...

not my kind of job I'll tell ya that. It was sooo mundane and boring.

I didn't get depressed.. but I was definitely not motivated and lacked a lot of energy, and a lot of the people there didn't help =/

 

[Evi]

I don't exactly get depressed, but I do feel my soul getting sucked out. I remember coming out of work one day after being drilled on corporate policy and crying because I couldn't remember the tune or the words to a Gregorian chant I normally know.

I daydreamed to escape. I also tend to throw myself into the job and become perfect at it. This however backfires on me. I have no energy at the end of the day for the things I need so I don't go nuts.

I do however really like my current job. Not a lot of contact with strangers, intuition is appreciated, talking isn't required and everyday is different.

 

[Travo7]

I think it depends. My job is very strenuous, physically. Intuition is of no value there, for it is a very hands-on, practical, sensing-focused, get-it-done type job. It's a warehouse job. Lots of sweat, lots of excercise, and it was totally overwhelming for me at first. The only thing that kept me there was the fact that I had kids and needed the benefits.

Now, I love it because:

A. I can do the work and be in "the land of make-beleive" at the same time. I've learned to block out all the bullshit.
B. All 10 people in my area are pretty cool.
C. the physical work is actually quite stress releiving. Almost like being paid to work out.
D. no outside customers

It was a challenge for me (and still is), don't get me wrong. But, it leaves me time on the weekends to focus on the people and things I love. Just a paycheck.

 

[vince]

I definitely become depressed in the wrong job. This happened at my previous job. Looking back I should have quit 2 years earlier.
I love my new job, but at one point they also moved me to an open office where I'm sitting right in the middle of 8 people -because "I'm so important" LOL. I seriously complained about this to my chef, but eventually it was a huge improvement for my self development.

And I'm definitely HSP.

 

[Dwigie]

Well, I'm "alien"(that always kills me, it's not foreigner, it's an alien!) so I can't work.
And I'm still in school, but yeah my grades are pretty wide apart.
A++ in spanish, languages anything that requires language or anything that somehow involves "people" being the subject.(Sociology, geography,history..) I usually do well at.
Take out that human factor and I just don't care, except for languages .
(I am terrible at calculus, but really good in geometry for some odd reason. I also hated chemistry and physics but I liked biology.)
Basically, if there's not a relation to people or "human" I just don't care.
Ex: in my economics and social science class we talk about investment and stock markets and I struggle to listen because it just bores me and I can feel that "draining" begin. You do feel kind of depressed...but mostly bored.

 

[felt up]

I'm in my 40s and for the exception of a job I had for a whole year and a half, I've never held a job past 6 months. I have an extreme reaction to the people, aesthetic setting, and a whole myriad of components that I can't fully detail here. I'm self-employed now and sometimes do contract work for short periods of time where I am exposed to the elements briefly. I thought this could be resolved in my 20s with tons of (psychological) help, but I still feel the same way. I think you have to build the life that is suited to your personality.

 

[Tallulah]

I'm not INFJ, but I'd say I"m an HSP, and where I work has a huge effect on my mood. I get depressed if I'm in a job that doesn't utilize my skills, if I don't like my coworkers, or even if the environment is utilitarian and not warm. For some reason, my surroundings affect me quite a bit. I developed anxiety once when I worked alone in a claustrophobic doctor's office.

My INFJ friend is in a soul-sucking job right now, and it's killing her. The only difference is that she keeps telling herself to suck it up and stop being such a baby, or to be grateful that she actually has a job, etc...whereas I would just complain and quit.

 

[vince]

Ex: in my economics and social science class we talk about investment and stock markets and I struggle to listen because it just bores me and I can feel that "draining" begin. You do feel kind of depressed...but mostly bored.

Same here.
I can tolerate economics and the people involved in it, just as long as they don't bother me with it.
What does drive me mad however is when people look at me as if I'm not down to earth enough because I coudn't care less about their artificial world.
I think the whole crisis at the stock markets shows just how surreal it all is. Last time I checked, after you plant seeds, food still grows at the same rate.

 

[Jae Rae]

If you're in a job that doesn't suit your preferences, do you get depressed? I already didn't like my job and then they moved my cube to an open area. People are behind me and there's a lot more stimuli/less privacy. I think for a hsp this is bad. After just a couple months I'm already depressed. I was also in a job that was a poor fit for me in the past and I continued being depressed months AFTER I left it-like it took time to get over it. Do others have this difficulty and how do you cope/deal with it?

Karenk, you live in the East Bay, you're HSP and INFJ - all 3 apply to me.

It's funny, I have the opposite seating situation from you - I was recently moved out of the main traffic flow at work and have a very private corner. In the beginning it made me sad, but I'm making it work for me; eg, I can check stock prices or the news without feeling everyone is looking over my shoulder. I'm also decorating my walls. I miss the camaraderie of sitting in the middle of the room, but most people here are introverts, so not much socializing happens anyway.

Thanks for your post, which reminds me that perhaps this will work out better for me in the long run. I walk around a lot, send office emails and invite 1 or 2 people to have lunch or get coffee; this works better for me than a "let's all go to happy hour" invitation which was proposed by the manager a month ago, then cancelled.

Mostly I think my job suits me; I've always worked in a fairly small office or business, and this is one of the largest. My main problem is the routine of cataloguing all day. I handle this by taking on unusual or challenging materials, like art, maps, medical instruments, etc. Sometimes this works out, but occasionally it backfires; recently I took on a medical collection - not books, but other collectibles - about which I knew very little. It was interesting, but fairly stressful because the learning curve was quite steep.

The worst job I ever had was doing bookkeeping for a book dealer in his absence from photocopies of his checkbook. His office was a few steps from the Stockton Tunnel and exceedingly dark, damp and depressing. No wonder he wasn't there. I lasted 2 weeks. Everything about it was wrong for me.

 

[ThatsWhatHeSaid]

To me, this question is like asking: "ISTPs, do you get hurt when people stab you in the neck?"

 

[littledarling]

If you're in a job that doesn't suit your preferences, do you get depressed? I already didn't like my job and then they moved my cube to an open area. People are behind me and there's a lot more stimuli/less privacy. I think for a hsp this is bad. After just a couple months I'm already depressed. I was also in a job that was a poor fit for me in the past and I continued being depressed months AFTER I left it-like it took time to get over it. Do others have this difficulty and how do you cope/deal with it?

Oh my goodness yes! I have been a professional nanny for almost 5 years. I love working with children. The family that I am with now, I absolutely adore. However, last year was horrible. I was set up with a family by one of the nanny agencies I am with and signed a one-year contract with them. About 2 weeks into the job I already hated it. For one thing, the family dynamic was extremely unhealthy. One of the little boys I "looked after", had A LOT of issues and the family refused to see there was a problem. They saw no problem with a 4 year-old locking himself in his room all day long and watching cartoons and refusing to eat anything but hot dogs. I also had no real responsibility because the grandmother was always there looking after them. So my job basically turned into cleaning his house and running errands for the grandmother. The grandmother was also extremely controlling and basically just not a nice person at all. Personality wise, I think she was a very unhealthy ESFJ. It was horrible. I got extremely depressed and there were quite a few tearful phone calls made to my parents. I was determined to stick it out for the year that I promised. About 3 months before the contract ended they decided to add 3 more children (the boys' cousins) to the mix. The way that this is supposed to work through the agency is they're supposed to talk with me about it first, and if I agree they should offer a 1-3$ raise for watching 5 children, instead of the 2 that I had orginally agreed on. But they never consulted me at all. So after a few weeks I brought it up to them. (Which was extremely terrifying, as I HATE conflict.) They're reaction was unbelievable, and I honestly still have nightmares about it all. They yelled and name-called...all in front of the children. And can you believe it, I still didn't leave. I stayed for another month. It's been 3 months since I stopped working for them and I cannot even drive through that part of town without feeling sick to my stomach.

 

[violaine]

Yes to the OP. It's only happened in one job. Really affected my health/happiness though. I thought I got my dream job in child protection - a lot of writing, excellent career path, nice level of autonomy. But the team dynamics were so off-the-wall, I was on good terms with everyone, but they all hated each other. Everything good would be derailed by personal conflict. I didn't respect any of them cos we were meant to be focused on doing the greater good and they would be arguing about what color paper the next office circular should be. (srsly!) It turned a meaningful job into a pointless one.

Due to other circumstances I left that job and started doing something creative. That made everything better though it took me a while to get over how much that job had affected me. So glad I'm not there anymore.

 

[iwakar]

If you're in a job that doesn't suit your preferences, do you get depressed? I already didn't like my job and then they moved my cube to an open area. People are behind me and there's a lot more stimuli/less privacy. I think for a hsp this is bad. After just a couple months I'm already depressed. I was also in a job that was a poor fit for me in the past and I continued being depressed months AFTER I left it-like it took time to get over it. Do others have this difficulty and how do you cope/deal with it?

OMFG, yes.

 

[soleil]

Definitely

 

[lane777]

Right now I'm unhappy with my my job because I'm not reaching my high standards. I work at a health food store only 8 hours a week, and because of that, I can't learn the products which means I can't answer Q's or give useful advice. So I mainly work the register. But I wouldn't say I'm depressed about it, simply dissatisfied with what I feel is a meaningless occupation, plus feeling inadequate.

 

[Moiety]

I'd go out of my way to quit jobs that are making me miserable no matter how much I get payed. Life is too short simply think about survival...and there's always another job out there.


But then again, I never really had a job


PS: What's a HSP? This question isn't even directed at me but I felt inclined to answer it anyway

 

[Eileen]

To me, this question is like asking: "ISTPs, do you get hurt when people stab you in the neck?"

hahaha. yeah. I know people who can handle going to work even if they don't like their jobs, but most everybody I know, regardless of type, suffers if work sucks--especially if it's a job that you're emotionally invested in.

 

[Eileen]

I'd go out of my way to quit jobs that are making me miserable no matter how much I get payed. Life is too short simply think about survival...and there's always another job out there.


But then again, I never really had a job


PS: What's a HSP? This question isn't even directed at me but I felt inclined to answer it anyway

highly sensitive person

 

[Moiety]

highly sensitive person

Oops, definitely wrong thread...