[ENTP] ENTPs and relationship sabotage?

[jenocyde]

just remember to put "überhaupt" after "kümnmert sich" and I will be the dog who will follow you everywhere

Das Leben ist nicht einfach, digga. Meine Grammatik ist schlecht, aber ich behandeln alle meine Hunde mit viel Respekt. woof.

 

[Fluffywolf]

Es gibt nichts, was es nicht gibt!

 

[jenocyde]

außer mir...

(oder außer für mich??? ich weiß es nicht...)

 

[entropie]

I didnt meant the grammar this is indeed quite perfect, you have got a new lover here

 

[jenocyde]

I know what you meant. I just wanted to hear you say it.

 

[Gamine]

I'd like to jump on the bandwagon of "I'm so glad other people are a similar strand of crazy to find entertainment/comfort/hilarity/opposition." Or more accurately, watch it pass me on the country road and rob it, only to find you guys and use my exploits to buy a couple rounds.

 

[jenocyde]

I'd like to jump on the bandwagon of "I'm so glad other people are a similar strand of crazy to find entertainment/comfort/hilarity/opposition." Or more accurately, watch it pass me on the country road and rob it, only to find you guys and use my exploits to buy a couple rounds.

No we'll use your exploits to get some guys to buy us a couple of rounds. That's right, 'cause no one puts Twinkie in a corner.

 

[Gamine]

No we'll use your exploits to get some guys to buy us a couple of rounds. That's right, 'cause no one puts Twinkie in a corner.

If I ever became a bandit rogue pirate person, like professionally and not just for killing boredom, which may be the same thing, because aren't all pirates bored on the inside? I bet we would have more pirates if boats were cheaper and people were generally more open to using more R sounds in their speech patterns. I don't remember where I was going with that Jen, but there was a payoff for you in this occupational consideration.

I'm halfers for the getting-guys-to-buy-me-drinks-thing. I think it's awesome because I'm a lightweight drinker, cheap, cheap and lazy. At the same time it's annoying for how presumptuous some guys are. Now just to figure out how to join those two things... Maybe getting drinks from someone while insulting them? What combo moves do you see/have?



I you other entps

 

[marmandahalf]

Maybe getting drinks from someone while insulting them?

Sadly, many guys seem to kind of like being insulted. It's unfortunate when you want someone to go away, so you tell them exactly what you're thinking about them, and they hang around even more.

My primary group of friends in high school were composed of just such boys.

 

[jenocyde]

I'm halfers for the getting-guys-to-buy-me-drinks-thing. I think it's awesome because I'm a lightweight drinker, cheap, cheap and lazy. At the same time it's annoying for how presumptuous some guys are. Now just to figure out how to join those two things... Maybe getting drinks from someone while insulting them? What combo moves do you see/have?

No no no, I was just teasing. I don't like it when people buy me things. It happens, for sure, but never my intention. Because then you can't get rid of them. They stare at you while you down their $8 and it hardly seems worth the trouble to me.

But then again, it could be fun to test out all those R sounds. And letting them watch is definitely worth the $8, I think.

Sadly, many guys seem to kind of like being insulted. It's unfortunate when you want someone to go away, so you tell them exactly what you're thinking about them, and they hang around even more.

A lot of people of both genders have a hard time believing that I mean what I say. Always looking for subtext where there is none. So perhaps the men just don't believe us. Then our words get stronger. I think a lot of dudes must think we are teasing and playing hard to get when we actually insult them. Ego overload. If someone even looks at me funny, I'm gone - I can't imagine sticking around for any sort of abuse...

 

[entropie]

I am mostly alone at the bar at some point after the party has started and the everyone-else-buying-themselves-drinks-to-donate thing has started.

But at an advanced hour though, I get occasionally lucky and a 10 year older + 2 heads taller lady sits down next to me at the bar, asking if I would happen to know the right guy to order a 16 years old Glenfiddich Solera Single-Malt Scotch without ice.

I am really no big fan of clichés but life always tends to do a full-spin into that direction, when at a party the hours have advanced. This is then the point when some of the people with whom I entered the bar in the beginning tend to find me again and ask why I am talking to the empty chair next to me

 

[digesthisickness]

To Jenocyde and Marm:
What I found that helps... is... forcing yourself to feel sadness. Feel their sadness. I don't know why, but it helps. Especially with the guilt. And try to rebuild that sabotaged bridge. And from that point, you've done all you can do.

just don't take it too far. being able to see all points of view can sometimes screw you up and cause you to forget/neglect your own when you care so much.

My question is then, what type could possibly put up with this?

Let me know when you figure that one out.

add me to that list.

You know what? The guilt is gone now. Poof - just like that. Even though he's still sobbing in the next room (ugh)... My rationale took over and I realized that I did nothing wrong (I really didn't!). I decided to tell him my honest feelings and he reacted to it. I can't be responsible for his reactions, only my actions. And I feel that I was honest, fair and kind. I can't force anyone to accept the truth - and I admit it is rather hard to face, at times. But I don't believe in being a martyr or in suffering in silence.

I can only be me, and if that's not what you want/need/like, then get to f'ing stepping. I still care for him dearly, and this is probably not our last chapter (this is +/- 10 years now...) but I won't pretend something I just don't feel, and I won't accept something I just don't like. Life is too short.

i couldn't agree more with the last paragraph of your post, but i've found that faking it enough to salvage the other's feelings as much as possible erases that guilt. for me, i then know that i really did do all that i could, and once i know that, i'm totally guilt-free and well, free in general.

Wow, my 2nd to last post reads like it's from an issue of You Go, Girl magazine. Now I feel that 6th emotion - shame. hahahaa...

i rarely feel that one. maybe i've made an ass out of myself so many times that it now rolls off of my back. i go through life assuming i'm going to say something i shouldn't have, and balance that knowledge out with knowing the person i'm talking to will do the same thing eventually.

and, most likely sooner than later. it's a human thing.

 

[lifeintechnicolor]

OK, I'm going to put it out there.


I think I'm in love. And I'm scared out of my mind. I'm scared of getting hurt. I'm scared of rejection. How can I NOT mess this one up?

I thought I should ask you guys, since you seem to have a pretty good grasp of how my mind works.

 

[marmandahalf]

OK, I'm going to put it out there.


I think I'm in love. And I'm scared out of my mind. I'm scared of getting hurt. I'm scared of rejection. How can I NOT mess this one up?

I thought I should ask you guys, since you seem to have a pretty good grasp of how my mind works.

Oh gosh, if I knew, one of my last infinity relationships would still be happening.

 

[lifeintechnicolor]

Oh gosh, if I knew, one of my last infinity relationships would still be happening.

I feel like I shouldn't be asking. I feel like I should know. And I know what I want to do, but I want to be sure it's the right thing. Am I insane or something?

 

[Mitzy]

we're all in the same boat
i have a question
does anyone seem to turn more 'f' for the person their with? not in general or as a whole, but just for them. like an exception.
is it everyone, or a girl thing, or a type thing, or is it just me >_>

i really dont like it but i turn really mushy and sentimental and less rational
ew and im actually confessing about it
but im desperate for help with a current situation.
idk, im just confused

 

[jenocyde]

OK, I'm going to put it out there.


I think I'm in love. And I'm scared out of my mind. I'm scared of getting hurt. I'm scared of rejection. How can I NOT mess this one up?

I thought I should ask you guys, since you seem to have a pretty good grasp of how my mind works.

I just majorly fucked up last night, so I am probably not the best help. However, I'm usually better at other people's lives than I am with my own. Can you give us more details?

 

[jenocyde]

we're all in the same boat
i have a question
does anyone seem to turn more 'f' for the person their with? not in general or as a whole, but just for them. like an exception.
is it everyone, or a girl thing, or a type thing, or is it just me >_>

i really dont like it but i turn really mushy and sentimental and less rational
ew and im actually confessing about it
but im desperate for help with a current situation.
idk, im just confused

Yes. I f all over the place. If I fall for someone, I fall hard. And then I'm a babbling brook of mushiness. But only in his presence. As soon as he exits stage left, I'm back to my old self again. But whenever he's back in my sight, all rationale goes out the window.

Unless we are discussing politics... (some things just won't change.)

 

[Gamine]

we're all in the same boat
i have a question
does anyone seem to turn more 'f' for the person their with? not in general or as a whole, but just for them. like an exception.
is it everyone, or a girl thing, or a type thing, or is it just me >_>

i really dont like it but i turn really mushy and sentimental and less rational
ew and im actually confessing about it
but im desperate for help with a current situation.
idk, im just confused

I don't think I would label it as being more "f", but the softer more openly emotional part of me (shhh it's a secret) only comes out around the people I trust most. This isn't the bubbly energetic performer side of me, but that other backstage persona. When I'm infatuated with someone, they fit into this group of people, and I aggressively compassion them.

 

[lifeintechnicolor]

we're all in the same boat
i have a question
does anyone seem to turn more 'f' for the person their with? not in general or as a whole, but just for them. like an exception.
is it everyone, or a girl thing, or a type thing, or is it just me >_>

i really dont like it but i turn really mushy and sentimental and less rational
ew and im actually confessing about it
but im desperate for help with a current situation.
idk, im just confused

I agree with jenocyde. I tend to be more F when he's around, I just don't have the slightest clue why. In general I don't like to be very emotional and such, but when he's around for some reason I am.

As for details. He's one of my greatest friends. He understands me, and actually gets that I need my space sometimes. (he's an ESFJ) It actually seems like he tries to understand my mind when I'm around him, and at just the right level. We've come close to actually having a relationship many times before, but I always find a way to freeze up and doubt myself before I make a move. This time I'm sure I want to, but I don't want to keep shying away when things are going well. I guess what I'm looking for is security. I don't want to be that awkward teenager who's all 'hey, could you ask _____ who he likes?' because that's just foolish and immature. I want this to work. Badly.

I hate talking about this stuff, so bear with me. :blushing: